INSERT INTO `wped_posts` VALUES (99741,1,'2020-02-11 09:39:35','2020-02-11 07:39:35','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99365} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2019/11/1102014686_univ_lsr_xl-1024x512.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99365\"/><figcaption>The Parable of the Prodigal Son</figcaption></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The parable of the prodigal son is one of the default go-to stories for Christians when we seek to underscore the unconditional love of God as immaculately epitomized by the Father in the parable.  At face value the unconditional love of the Father is the key deliverable of the story as narrated by Jesus. However, an up-close assimilation of the not only the content but the ingenuity behind the fictitious narrative illuminates the fact that while the unconditional love of the Father remains the key deliverable of the narrative, the gist of the story is not simplistically in the story in and of itself, but elsewhere. Keep reading... </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>The Parable of the Lost Son: Luke 15:11-32</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>11 Jesus continued: “There was a man who had two sons. 12 The younger one said to his father, ‘Father, give me my share of the estate.’ So he divided his property between them. 13 “Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country and there squandered his wealth in wild living. 14 After he had spent everything, there was a severe famine in that whole country, and he began to be in need. 15 So he went and hired himself out to a citizen of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed pigs. 16 He longed to fill his stomach with the pods that the pigs were eating, but no one gave him anything.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>17 “When he came to his senses, he said, ‘How many of my father’s hired servants have food to spare, and here I am starving to death! 18 I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. 19 I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired servants.’ 20 So he got up and went to his father. “But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him.21 “The son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.’ 22 “But the father said to his servants, ‘Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. 23 Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let’s have a feast and celebrate. 24 For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’ So they began to celebrate. 25 “Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing. 26 So he called one of the servants and asked him what was going on. 27 ‘Your brother has come,’ he replied, ‘and your father has killed the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.’</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>28 “The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him. 29 But he answered his father, ‘Look! All these years I’ve been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. 30 But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!’ 31 “‘My son,’ the father said, ‘you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. 32 But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’”</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading -->\n<h2>10 Take Aways</h2>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:list {\"ordered\":true} -->\n<ol><li>A true story requires a mere narration  without any thought investment from the story teller, a fictitious story presents thoughtful detail informed by the sensitivity of the story teller to the inner affairs of humanity. In this regard a real life story would be deficient of necessary detail to underscore the profoundness of God’s love.</li><li>The fictitious narrative gives Jesus latitude to embed detail in the story that serves to teach and assert the principle of the parable, detail that would not be guaranteed in a real life story.</li><li>The triangulation around the psychology of a rebellious and repentant son, the grumpy elderly brothers’ attitude towards the Father and the younger brother, the steadfast and unconditional love of the Father, present a profound prism which establishes the beauty of the unconditional love of God as real as the ugly estate of human rebellion, jealousy and repentance. </li><li>Christ poignantly unveils the psychology of a rebellious sinner, repentant sinner, jealous brother, not only their mere actions which would leave us conjecturing about motive and disposition, but  delves compassionately into their inner thoughts and psyches. Through parading the deep psychologies of human struggles and thought, Christ powerfully lays bare His inner thoughts, feelings and emotions as a creator:  The sum disposition of a loving God who is not far removed but rather up-close to the external and internal struggles of humanity. Christ is on a compelling pedestal to tell the story as He is God-man tempted in all points as we are, yet without sin, touched with the feeling of our infirmities. (Hebrews 4:15)</li><li>How profound is the story? it is so profound, it shouts the unconditional and amazing love of God not only through its content but more powerfully through its crafty construction and  the ingenuity behind narrative. </li><li>To grasp only the deliverable of the content of the story is to miss the bigger picture by a mile for there are many parables and real life incidents in and outside the Bible that powerfully uphold the undying love of God. The main takeaway of the story is not the story, but the motive behind the creativity and innovation of the story which is to demonstrate not only the omniscience of God but His immaculate relevance to the diverse and intricate complexes of humanity. The real essence of the story is not the story but the undying love, the compassion and all-detailed disposition of the story teller as captured not in the content of the story as it were, but in the divine construction of the story. </li><li>The intentional piecing together of the fictitious pieces of the imaginary scenario and characters to craft the parable is where the profoundness of the parable lies. The thinking behind the story, the consideration of what to include and exclude in the narrative is where lies the redemptive beauty of God and the hope for all mankind. </li><li>By default the story projects the unconditional love of the Father, however a detailed zooming in into the narrative creativity and ingenuity projects a high definition display of the closeness of God to humanity, His thoughtful concern with what we would classify as minutiae in the affairs of humanity is profoundly reassuring. Through the parable Jesus projects  demonstrable intimate knowledge and remedy for human woes of sin, rebellion, licentiousness, guilt, shame, repentance, jealous, disappointment, etc. There is nothing that we go through that shocks God, He is not even shocked by our sinfulness. His arms are ever open to meet us even at the very point where and when we are embarrassed by our failures and  have given up on ourselves. </li><li>The profundity is in the rotundity of the narrator\'s consciousness of the complex struggles, failures, frailties, regrets and the very potentials of human beings. This fact presents a radical station of a God whose disposition to humanity is not that of mere sympathy but sheer empathy, whose thrust is not merely supportive but decisively victorious.  In Jesus we have a God who is not only touched with the feeling of our infirmities but is more acquainted with our true situations more than we are, and more than we are prepared to face the fact.</li><li>Ultimately, the hope and salvation for humanity lies is not in our weak, unreliable and sometimes questionable love for God,  our hope and redemption lies not in how much we love God but in how much God loves us. We can rest assured that the foundation of our salvation is  the solid Rock, a more stable and reliable basis than what our frail humanness could ever collectively  assure. </li></ol>\n<!-- /wp:list -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>\n        Romans 8:38–39\n\n                    \n            \n\n    </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>“For I am sure that neither \ndeath nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to \ncome, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all \ncreation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ \nJesus our Lord.”</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','When Fiction is more Powerful than Reality: The Parable of the Prodigal Son under the Microscope','','inherit','closed','closed','','99364-revision-v1','','','2020-02-11 09:39:35','2020-02-11 07:39:35','',99364,'https://expound.org.za/99364-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99839,1,'2020-03-14 22:15:02','2020-03-14 20:15:02','','churh-and-dress-code-suit-and-neck-tie-bondage','','inherit','open','closed','','churh-and-dress-code-suit-and-neck-tie-bondage','','','2020-03-14 22:15:02','2020-03-14 20:15:02','',99838,'https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/churh-and-dress-code-suit-and-neck-tie-bondage.png',0,'attachment','image/png',0),(99840,1,'2020-03-14 22:19:38','2020-03-14 20:19:38','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99839} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/churh-and-dress-code-suit-and-neck-tie-bondage-1024x364.png\" alt=\"Suit and necktie bondage. Church and dress code\" class=\"wp-image-99839\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>I can barely imagine any issue\nthat is as half as decisive as the issue of dress and music in Christendom. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The point of departure for\nthis post is captured in the title, “Does wearing a suit and a necktie make you\nholy?”. “Suit and necktie” are chosen for immediate resonance and are by no\nmeans used to disenfranchise the females from the discourse. By extension, the\nquestion interrogates the issue of what holiness really is and whether or not\nlegalistic impositions on conduct for corporate worship do hold water. The\nquestion that also arises, inescapably is, what attire is acceptable for\nchurch? Should such a question even arise?</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Two framing contentions.</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:list {\"ordered\":true} -->\n<ol><li>Some Christians feel people need to come dressed at their “best” when they come to church for they come to meet their King and as such they have to be in their best (formal) attire and conduct.</li><li>Some feel the issue of attire is a non-issue as the defining principle of true worship is worshiping God in spirit and truth.</li></ol>\n<!-- /wp:list -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<strong> Let’s delve into a few insights and then conclude a few biblical guidelines</strong>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Let’s deal with the first\nframing contention that asserts that we should come to church at our best\nattire (and in most cases “best” is misused as synonym for “formal”) as we are\ncoming to meet our King, as a matter of fact, the King of the Universe. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>This notion seems to curry favor\nwith a lot of average Christian thinking that has been regrettably entrenched\nas gospel truth. The argument that when we come to church we are coming to meet\nour King and thus we should be in the best (formal) of our attires only holds\nwater until we appreciate that the very King is our Father. Do you really need\nto dress up to meet your Dad? God is many things to us but the His defining\nidentity for our relationship with Him is that He is our Father, for we are His\nsons and daughters.&nbsp; At this point there\nis no need to deconstruct the “formalistic” spat further, its flawed framing is\nsufficiently and defectively fatal. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Secondly, God is omnipresent.\nThis denotes that He is present everywhere without necessarily having to be\nphysically present everywhere for He arts in heaven. The nub of this fact is\nthat we live in the presence of God in our homes, in whatever business we do in\nour kitchens, bedrooms, bathrooms and elsewhere (everywhere) God is ever\npresent. We do not go to church to meet God primarily, although we ultimately\ndo as He is the center of what we go to church for. Nonetheless we go to church\nprimarily to fellowship with fellow humans, of course in the presence of an\never present God. Thus; most of our notions of decorum and propriety are\ninformed more by culture and human expectations which have nothing at all to do\nwith God. Nothing is sad as humanity anointing mere tradition on the throne of\ngospel truth and generations swallowing the formalistic palaver as if it were a\nthus saith the Lord. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In order to exercise mental\nhygiene on this issue, the formalistic tribe who are driven by a lopsided ratio\nof zeal to knowledge must interrogate the basis of their positions on this\nissue. In most cases the dogmatic overbearing disposition stems from mere\nsocialisation. There is no wisdom in reason that is circumscribed within the\nconfines of socialisation and taps not from the rich and diverse cultures and\nexperiences outside its place of birth and death. A fixation on mere tradition\nis what led to the Jews crucifying their own messiah. Perish the thought of\ndead formalistic traditionalism. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The biggest currency for true\nfellowship and Christianity is social literacy or social intelligence; which\nderives from Christian love and high levels of tolerance for the next human\nbeing. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3>Biblical guidelines on dress</h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>&nbsp;1 Peter 3:3-4 </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>3 Your beauty should not come\nfrom outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold\njewellery or fine clothes. 4 Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the\nunfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s\nsight.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph {\"align\":\"left\"} -->\n<p style=\"text-align:left\"><strong>A few takes-homes</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3> While the preferential aspects of modesty are subjective, the principle is objective </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>One fundamental principle of\ndress across the bible is modesty. Then there are those of us who will seek to\nsubjectivise and relativise the issue of modesty until there is nothing left to\nwork with and thus inevitably undermining the wisdom of God in giving&nbsp; the principle. While superficial and\npreferential aspects of modesty can be debated, the core fundaments of the\nprinciple are sufficiently objective. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Modesty fundamentally means\nthat whatever is chosen as dress or attire should not emphasise sexuality. If\nyou are struggling with what this means and boils down to practically, I have\nno doubt in my mind that God will help you if you are sincere. Prescriptivism\nhas been one major problem around the issue of dress and to venture into\nprescribing mechanically what to wear or what not to wear is to miss the point\nby huge stretch. My view is that Jesus has the knowledge, wisdom and capability\nto dress up His children to His satisfaction. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The best way to assimilate the\nprinciple of modest is to ask a few questions when dealing with the issue of\ndress:</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Does this attire deemphasise\nmy sexuality? </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Does the attire help me focus\nless on myself and more on God? </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>If you can answer “yes” earnestly\nto those both questions then go ahead and wear it. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>By the way this is the reason\nwhy most people are comfortable in adorning casual attire rather than rocking\nup in overly formal wear at church. In most cases, encumbering formal wear like\na suit or anything similar for females, tend to keep the wearer more\nself-conscious and self-absorbed than modest yet casual apparel that\nessentially divests attention from self.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3> Principles of Modesty are for our edification </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>This is very important. Having\nasserted the objective principle of modesty I have to state that the principles\nof modesty and all education on how we should conduct ourselves are for our\nedification and the edification of those we have influence over. These\nprinciples are not for sizing up or measuring the spirituality of others. In\nother words, the biblical principles of modesty are for our benefit and the\nbenefit of those we have access to influence positively. These principles are\nNOT for policing fellow mortals and curating their spirituality based on the\nshortness or lengths of their skirts or on whether their attires meet our rigid\nand formalistic human standards. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h2>The principles of modesty are a shield and not a weapon.</h2>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Consider this, “The foul spirit of forming negative and uninformed opinions about others is the outcome of the “judge” over estimating their importance and esteeming themselves better than the “judged” in a convoluted paradigm of comparative holiness.” (<strong><a href=\"https://expound.org.za/why-do-we-judge-others/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" aria-label=\"Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy, Expound: 2020 (opens in a new tab)\">Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy, Expound: 2020</a>)</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In conclusion, wearing a tie\nand a suit or whatever the equivalent are for females does not make anyone\nholy. Holiness is an outcome of: rather than a means to salvation. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Don’t hesitate to share your\nthoughts below. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Recommended Post: </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong><a href=\"https://expound.org.za/why-do-we-judge-others/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" aria-label=\"Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy (opens in a new tab)\">Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy</a></strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Does wearing a suit and necktie make you holy? Mental hygiene on church and dress','','inherit','closed','closed','','99838-revision-v1','','','2020-03-14 22:19:38','2020-03-14 20:19:38','',99838,'https://expound.org.za/99838-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99748,1,'2020-02-19 16:13:37','2020-02-19 14:13:37','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99600} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/grow-up.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99600\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>I am aware that the subject of purposeful living is a tired causeway for motivational speakers. Notwithstanding, the difference between bubblegum-motivational-talk and the word of God is that skin-deep motivational talk can get you excited and the next morning when you check as to why you are excited you will struggle to pin your excitement on any solid base. However with the word of God, you will get uplifted, challenged and inspired and your “why” base will remain sustainably intact. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading -->\n<h2> Potential Versus Purpose </h2>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Let me open with this quote: <br>\nAs the will of man cooperates with the will of God, it becomes omnipotent. Whatever is to be done at His command may be accomplished in His strength. All His biddings are enablings. (Our Father Cares page 308)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>One of the draw cards of motivational talk is the, “achieve your potential” mantra. However, the life of Christ teaches a radical concept about life. Jesus did not achieve His potential, however He achieved His purpose within the 33 and a half years He spent on planet earth. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading -->\n<h2>Jesus did not achieve His potential but He achieved His purpose.  </h2>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Jesus could have potentially been a great ruler of Jews if He wanted to pursue that but He did not exhaust his potential in that line because He did not pursue that. He could have pursued His full potential as a healer and set up a ministry to do much healing work for at least 40 to 50 years or so but He did not pursue that and therefore He did not achieve His potential in that. Generally Jesus did not achieve His true potential because He had not come to achieve any potential but rather to accomplish a specific purpose.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the point of departure, when the human will is aligned to the will of God, it becomes omnipotent. “Omni”  means “all”, “potent” means “power” or “powerful”. In other words, when the will of a human being is aligned to the will of God there is no limit to what the human being can achieve. If you understand the import of the foregoing then you would understand that even two thousand years would not suffice for one to achieve their true potential because once the human will is aligned to the will of God the possibilities can not even be quantified. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Anchor Verse: John 17:4  “I have glorified You on the earth. I have finished the work which You have given Me to do.”<br>\nThis Jesus said just before he was crucified. He could look back into His life and work and confidently say, “I have finished the work which you gave me to do”. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Also, at the apex of his  earthly ministry while hanging on the cross and shouldering the frightful mass and weight of the iniquities of the human race, He declared that He had finished the work God had given Him to do. <br>\nAt 33 years Jesus could look at His life and work and declare that He was done with His purpose on earth. This fact alone is profoundly instructive on purposeful living. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Do you know how this was possible for Christ? It was possible because at the age of 12 Jesus already knew His purpose. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Luke chapter 2 verse 48-49 </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>48 And when they saw him, they were amazed: and his mother said unto him, Son, why hast thou thus dealt with us? behold, thy father and I have sought thee sorrowing.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>49 And he said unto them, How is it that ye sought me? wist ye not that I must be about my Father\'s business?</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3> What do you want to be when you grow up? </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Most people will be quick to dismiss the sterling success and accomplishments of Christ in the short time He was down here as mere outworking of His limitless divinity. Christ however demystified this notion when addressing his disciples: </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>John 14:12 <br>\nVerily, verily, I say unto you, He that believeth on me, the works that I do shall he do also; and greater works than these shall he do; because I go unto my Father.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>So friend, there is actually no excuse for mediocrity in any front. Jesus promised that we can do it so long as we plug to the same power He was plugged to. As we are soon to discover, poverty, a poor background, inhibiting socio-political factors, rejection etc did not stop Jesus and thus they can not and should not stop me and you.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Let’s look at the odds that were staked against Jesus when He achieved His mission: </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3> 1. Poverty </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Jesus came from a poor family. <br>\nLuke 2:24 and to offer a sacrifice in keeping with what is said in the Law of the Lord: “a pair of doves or two young pigeons.” </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember that according to Leviticus 12:8, for the ritual Mary and Joseph were performing upon the birth of a male first born child the ideal sacrifice model was a lamb for the burnt offering and either a dove or pigeon for the sin offering. The sacrifice model brought according to Luke 2:24 was an insignia of poverty. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong> Chances are high me and you have more resources and opportunities that Jesus had in any grind and drive of life</strong>.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3> 2. Jesus hailed from the ghetto </h3> <br> In John 1: 43-46, Philip is interacting with Nathaniel and draws the attention of Nathaniel to the Messiah from Nazareth whom Moses in the law and the scribes have written about, Nathaniel’s reaction is, “What good can come of Nazareth”. To give context to Nathaniel\'s reaction, studies indicate that Nazareth was a community notorious for poverty, crime and violence, a slum or Ghetto if you like, and this was Jesus’ hood.\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>So Jesus did not hail from some opulent or leafy suburb and this proves the fact that your address of birth is not necessarily your destiny and neither can it hinder  your dreams and drive if you are determined to achieve your purpose. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3> 3. Jesus came under Roman Imperialism </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Jesus was born in the era when Jews were under Roman rule. Do you know what that means, it means “apartheid”, or imperialism (colonialism) if you like it, did not stop him. <br> We can not be previously disadvantaged, currently disadvantaged and forever disadvantaged. Somewhere we must have what it takes to break the vicious cycle.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3> 4. Jesus had no family support </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Oh by the way, Jesus did not have family support in his mission. John 7:4 declares that he was rejected neither did His brethren believe him. Jesus’ family thought their very own was a huge embarrassment and disgrace to the family. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Going with this:  Jesus was embarrassingly rejected home and away.  John 6:42 And they said, Is not this Jesus, the son of Joseph, whose father and mother we know? how is it then that he saith, I came down from heaven?</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The religious leaders dismissed Him as the son of Joseph. By asserting his sonship to Joseph they were casting aspersions on His divine birth. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In the book of Luke, other than Simeon and prophetess Anna (Luke Chapter 1) who acknowledged the messiahship of the baby Jesus in the temple, the first entities to acknowledge Jesus’ holiness were demons (Luke 4:34). The take home: none of the excruciating rejection from the very race He had come to save discouraged Jesus. He trudged on and accomplished His purposes regardless.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Jesus did not enjoy church support. As a matter of fact, He  ultimately left the church and started a new church in the upper room. The church He had referred to as as “my house” (Mathew 21:13) He later distanced himself from it. “Look, your house is left unto you desolate.” Mathew 23:38</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3> 5. Jesus had no funding </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>One scribe admired what Christ was doing and verbalized that he would like to follow Christ. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>And Jesus said to him, “Foxes have holes and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has nowhere to lay His head.” (Matthew 8:20)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Do know what that means? It means Jesus had no funding for His start up. However that did not stop Him. How many a young person out there are languishing in lack of purpose and decisiveness in their enterprises and the default let off is, “Only if I could get funding. You can’t seek to use some one else’s yield (harvest) as seed for your untried and tested dreams. Funding is for scaling. It can not be scaled before it is. You scale what is already established. Even the notion of “seed” funding has its place. Back to the spiritual import: Little is much when God is in it. “Oh But I’ve got nothing…”, you say. God loves working with nothing. In fact He has a track record of achieving wonders with “Nothing”. At one time He stepped onto nothing and spoke to nothing and through that our world came to be. Oh and God does know how to put “nothing” to good use. Ask Elder Job. When God had finished creating planet earth do you know upon what He hung it? “Nothing\". Job 26:7 [He stretcheth out the north over the empty place, and hangeth the earth upon nothing.]<br> If you’ve got nothing, that\'s great, God says, bring it, and you will see what we can do with it. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>How Jesus scaled from a one-man-band, to a start-up, right up to a global blue chip without funding, presents profound universal and timeless life principles to be studied through endless ages.</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3> Jesus won against all odds </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<p> [signinlocker id=\"99515\"] </p>\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>What can you achieve with 30 years of preparation/planning and 3 and half years of execution!</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Jesus’ sterling accomplishments are beyond enumeration. However the 5 below are enough home work for us when we appreciate them in cognizance of the fact  that He achieved these, against all odds. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:list {\"ordered\":true} -->\n<ol><li>Jesus turned the world upside down. In a world with over 7 billion people more than 2 billion of these are Christians. You have over 2 billion people called by the name of a man who lived down here only for 33 and a half years and had no biological offspring to see to His legacy and posterity. When Jesus said that many would  come in His name and cast demons and ultimately He would reject them and tell them He never knew them (Mathew 24;5), He was not a celebrity. He was not an Instagram influencer. He had no followers on Facebook neither did He have a Twitter handle. He came and changed the world in an era when there were no cars and means of mass communication. He worked from the ground up and achieved His goals against all odds.</li><li>Jesus trained 11 disciples successfully. Notwithstanding that the team He worked with did not get the object of his mission until He died, resurrected and left for heaven, Jesus had the wisdom and the grace to identify men that had the potential to grow and transform and be similarly on fire for the gospel as their master was. Jesus had a strategy for His 3 and a half years of public ministry and what would happen when He was no longer down here and that worked to the dot.</li><li>Jesus healed the sick, raised the dead, preached, taught and reached out to outcasts and the downcast. While He had a very short span of time for His ministry, He was never too busy to meet human needs. </li><li>He conquered sin. Hebrews 4:15: \"For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin.\"<br> Never was He at any point tempted to be impatient or to cut corners on the basis of the weight of his mission and its urgency. He  had normal “down time” as me and you in that He also got tired and retired to sleep when He needed to.</li><li>Lastly: He died for us. Jesus accomplished the complex mission of avoiding murder while committing to die for us without being suicidal about it. This is a hard saying. If you were to ask Jesus what He wanted to be when He grew up His dream was neither to be a pilot nor an engineer, or whatever the lucrative mainstream career paths were for that time. His dream was to die. He ultimately accomplished that. On the very cross before He gave up His spirit He declared, “It is Finished”. That meant quite a mouthful and part of what it meant was that His earthly mission had been accomplished. </li></ol>\n<!-- /wp:list -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>When He said “It is finished the essence of Isiah Chapter 53 had been accomplished. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3> Isiah Chapter 53 </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n1.Who hath believed our report? and to whom is the arm of the Lord revealed?\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>2 For he shall grow up before him as a tender plant, and as a root out of a dry ground: he hath no form nor comeliness; and when we shall see him, there is no beauty that we should desire him.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>3 He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: and we hid as it were our faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>4 Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>5 But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>6 All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned every one to his own way; and the Lord hath laid on him the iniquity of us all.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>7 He was oppressed, and he was afflicted, yet he opened not his mouth: he is brought as a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before her shearers is dumb, so he openeth not his mouth.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>8 He was taken from prison and from judgment: and who shall declare his generation? for he was cut off out of the land of the living: for the transgression of my people was he stricken.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>9 And he made his grave with the wicked, and with the rich in his death; because he had done no violence, neither was any deceit in his mouth.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>10 Yet it pleased the Lord to bruise him; he hath put him to grief: when thou shalt make his soul an offering for sin, he shall see his seed, he shall prolong his days, and the pleasure of the Lord shall prosper in his hand.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>11 He shall see of the travail of his soul, and shall be satisfied: by his knowledge shall my righteous servant justify many; for he shall bear their iniquities.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>12 Therefore will I divide him a portion with the great, and he shall divide the spoil with the strong; because he hath poured out his soul unto death: and he was numbered with the transgressors; and he bare the sin of many, and made intercession for the transgressors.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3>When I grow up </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>When I grow up, I want to own a big car, when I grow up I want to own that big house and live with my big happy family. When I group I want to obtain a prestigious qualification and excel in fronts academic and professional.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>But to grow up I need to grow down and become as humble as a child. To grow up I need to aim higher than that. To grow up I need to aim higher than high. To grow up I need to aim higher than the clouds. To grow up I need to aim higher than the crowds.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>When I grow up I want to deal with bigger things. Forget politics, terrorism and global warming. When I grow up I want to deal with bigger things. I want to fight sin, I want to conquer lust and pride and ultimately, through Christ I want to conquer death. Ultimately, I would like to have an interview with  death and pose a question, death where is your sting. When I grow up I want to deal with real issues. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>But to grow up I need to aim higher than high. To grow up I need grow down and be as humble as a child. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>When I grow up I want to go places. I mean real places. Forget table mountain, Dubai and the Grand Canyon. When I grow up I want to go up, fly across the sun, scale neptune and explore orion. When I grow up I want to go planets. When I grow up I want to follow the Lamb wheresoever He goes. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>But to grow up I must realize that I am destined for greatness. <br>To grow up I need to aim higher than high. To grow up I need to bury all excuses. To grow up I need to realize that my time is now. To grow up I must realize that “Yes I can”. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3>What do you want to be when you, Finally; grow up?</h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<p>[/signinlocker]</p>','What Do you Want to be When you Grow Up?','','inherit','closed','closed','','99597-revision-v1','','','2020-02-19 16:13:37','2020-02-19 14:13:37','',99597,'https://expound.org.za/99597-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99749,2,'2020-02-20 11:00:27','2020-02-20 09:00:27','Ever felt a poem coming\nWords boiling in your veins waiting to be birthed through ink\nEver felt vowels curl up your spine begging to be freed\nOnly to find that it\'s linguistic constipation\n\nI’m constipated\nMy soul is full of emotion but my hand can’t spell it out\nI’m bloated\nHead full of air\nYou’ll think there is peace in there, but it’s a chaotic whirlwind of confusion. A ravaging storm threatening to tear my soul apart\nSee I haven\'t written anything good in the last six months\nWait....I haven’t written anything in a good six months. I haven’t unbottled all I’ve seen, smelt, felt and heard.\nThe gutters of my mind are clogged but the rain is still pouring in\n\nI even made a commitment to write every morning and every evening\nBut word and thought don’t seem to align\nEmotion and ink don’t see eye to I\nI just can\'t seem to find a way to let it all out\n\nThis is the writer’s block.\n\nThe writer’s block is not some fancy phase experienced by elite writers. It is a universal phenomenon that has seen many go homeless, bankrupt and settling for divorce.\nIt is when we run out of the ink of life\nWhen time becomes stagnant and all our wishes and desires seem to never meet the light of reality\nWhen we put the pen down and give up on writing our story because we’ve run out of ideas, out of inspiration, out of motivation, and courage\nBecause we have run out of the will to continue with the poetry, with the story , with the song.\nThe point is we all and I mean all, get writer’s block\nWhen love dies and we stare into each other’s eyes, wondering what happened to the fire that kept our hearts burning\nWhen we opt to raise our hands not as a sign of continuing the story but a desperate giving up Brutally erasing some of the characters we ourselves chose to make part of the plot\n\nWe ourselves, do you hear that . We.\n\nThat is the problem.\nWe want to hold the pen, we want to be authors of a story we never started .\n\nWe want to submit our manuscripts only for editing but still want to call Him the Author and Finisher of our faith.\n\nWhy do we insist on carrying such a heavy load when we can hand over the pen to the one who drew the stars in the skies\nOne who will never run out of ideas because of His Omniscience\nOne who never loses motivation because He is committed to the craft His art, we His creation.\n\nHave we forgotten He willed us into existence He, whom we can always hand the pen over to when we’ve written ourselves into messes\nThe one whose blood will wash away all curses.\n\nSo even on the days when the words of my heart cannot find their way to the pages of my poetry book I’ll rest in this, that My Creator is still at it and He never has and never will know the Writer’s block.','Constipation','','inherit','closed','closed','','99718-revision-v1','','','2020-02-20 11:00:27','2020-02-20 09:00:27','',99718,'https://expound.org.za/99718-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99750,2,'2020-02-20 11:02:08','2020-02-20 09:02:08','<p style=\"text-align: center;\">Ever felt a poem coming\nWords boiling in your veins waiting to be birthed through ink\nEver felt vowels curl up your spine begging to be freed\nOnly to find that it\'s linguistic constipation</p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">I’m constipated\nMy soul is full of emotion but my hand can’t spell it out\nI’m bloated\nHead full of air\nYou’ll think there is peace in there, but it’s a chaotic whirlwind of confusion. A ravaging storm threatening to tear my soul apart\nSee I haven\'t written anything good in the last six months\nWait....I haven’t written anything in a good six months. I haven’t unbottled all I’ve seen, smelt, felt and heard.\nThe gutters of my mind are clogged but the rain is still pouring in</p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">I even made a commitment to write every morning and every evening\nBut word and thought don’t seem to align\nEmotion and ink don’t see eye to I\nI just can\'t seem to find a way to let it all out</p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">\nThis is the writer’s block.</p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">The writer’s block is not some fancy phase experienced by elite writers. It is a universal phenomenon that has seen many go homeless, bankrupt and settling for divorce.\nIt is when we run out of the ink of life\nWhen time becomes stagnant and all our wishes and desires seem to never meet the light of reality\nWhen we put the pen down and give up on writing our story because we’ve run out of ideas, out of inspiration, out of motivation, and courage\nBecause we have run out of the will to continue with the poetry, with the story , with the song.\nThe point is we all and I mean all, get writer’s block\nWhen love dies and we stare into each other’s eyes, wondering what happened to the fire that kept our hearts burning\nWhen we opt to raise our hands not as a sign of continuing the story but a desperate giving up Brutally erasing some of the characters we ourselves chose to make part of the plot</p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">We ourselves, do you hear that . We.</p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">\nThat is the problem.\nWe want to hold the pen, we want to be authors of a story we never started .</p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">We want to submit our manuscripts only for editing but still want to call Him the Author and Finisher of our faith.</p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">Why do we insist on carrying such a heavy load when we can hand over the pen to the one who drew the stars in the skies\nOne who will never run out of ideas because of His Omniscience\nOne who never loses motivation because He is committed to the craft His art, we His creation.</p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">Have we forgotten He willed us into existence He, whom we can always hand the pen over to when we’ve written ourselves into messes\nThe one whose blood will wash away all curses.</p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">\nSo even on the days when the words of my heart cannot find their way to the pages of my poetry book I’ll rest in this, that My Creator is still at it and He never has and never will know the Writer’s block.</p>','Constipation','','inherit','closed','closed','','99718-revision-v1','','','2020-02-20 11:02:08','2020-02-20 09:02:08','',99718,'https://expound.org.za/99718-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99751,2,'2020-02-20 11:05:02','2020-02-20 09:05:02','','pen-3301338_960_720','','inherit','open','closed','','pen-3301338_960_720','','','2020-02-20 11:05:02','2020-02-20 09:05:02','',99718,'https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/pen-3301338_960_720.jpg',0,'attachment','image/jpeg',0),(99752,1,'2020-02-24 17:05:55','2020-02-24 15:05:55','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99705} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/the-value-of-now-768x1024.jpg\" alt=\"The Value of Now\" class=\"wp-image-99705\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading -->\n<h2>Achieving your goals one now at a time</h2>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>“Now” is not only the only link between the past and the future, the previous moment and next, but between your life trajectory, your plans and their unfolding. I can not emphasize this point enough. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>“Now” is the only link between ambition and accomplishment. This fact and consideration alone will turn our concept of “now” right on its head.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Let’s illustrate the point more.<br>\nLook at your life in general, look at the plans you have, look at your goals, nothing in the immediate or distant future, nothing remote (in time or process) will be accessible if “Now” fails. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The assignment that is due tomorrow will not be submitted if “now” is not handled appropriately and that may derail your entire academic goal. If you miss work today or now, your employment status is compromised at best or jeopardized at worst. If “now” goes South, tomorrow (if it comes to you) can be a whole new ball game.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The lofty ambitions and aspirations some of which we are already working on: are not accessible outside an appropriate and fruitful handling of “now”. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading -->\n<h2>There is a time for everything</h2>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The reason people fail to achieve long term goals or any goals in the long run, is that “now” looks unimportant, the value of now is hardly appreciated. Right “now” someone thinks that how they should handle “now” is optional. They could either get on to that important task as planned or they can rather tune up some movie on Netflix and shelve the important task for later. Now seems to have a plurality of options with regards to how it can be handled. However every purposeful individual bent on achieving set goals knows clearly that the principle of acing “now” is not optional. In the ecosystem of life there are no options really. There is time for everything and time to work is time for just one thing: to work! Time for play is time for just one thing: to play.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>“Now” is often despised as an unimportant passing moment whose mishandling can be easily corrected in the next moment. This is a big lie we tell ourselves. As a matter of fact there is no optimal access to later, or tomorrow, next week, next month, next year or any other lofty life milestone outside the efficacious handling of “NOW”. The many nows we have misused and many we have been lent have a fleeting influence that makes us think there will always be “next time”. Not true.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Between the gone and the coming “Now” is the only way forward, to a non guaranteed forward.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The foregoing is what gives context to, “To day if ye will hear his voice, Harden not your hearts.” Hebrews 11:7</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading -->\n<h2>Now is the only door to the next step in the ladder of life. </h2>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Top achievers will tell you that the key is not to focus on the overwhelming lofty end product but on the process. Do  you know what focusing on the process entails? It entails handling your series of nows productively.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A life of failure is in essence a series of mishandled nows. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Keep wasting one now after another, (through idleness, slothfulness or busywork) before you know it the misused nows will add up to wasted moments, hours, days, weeks, months and years. They amount to a wasted life. It will dawn then that just like success in life is not an accident, neither is failure. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>You are where you are today, right now according to how you thought, what you decided and what you did in your timeline’s old “nows”. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Right now, in this seemingly negligible moment of time called now, a great legacy is either being born or built or being aborted. Right now the obituary to be read at your funeral (perhaps many years from now) is being scripted silently. Right now your future is being formed and decided by you. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Take note, success will be a net outcome of a whooping series of aced nows, however don’t be overwhelmed by countless units of nows, right now you only have one now to deal with and this will always be the rhythm of your life. One now at a time.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:quote -->\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote\"><p><strong>Psalm 90: 12<br>  So teach us to number our days,<br>  That we may apply our hearts unto wisdom.</strong></p></blockquote>\n<!-- /wp:quote -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Note, David’s prayer is that we learn to number our days, not to count then. So the point is not about the collective quantifying of the days but progressive living. Counting would imply mere quantifying while numbering implies progression. In other words day 1 lays the foundation for day 2, and day 2 lays the foundation for day 3 and so forth. <br>\nNumbering our days means that our lives are closed systems as opposed to open ended systems. A closed system has an A to Z structure. <br>\nThe tragedy of life is when you are on day 8 and days 1 to 7 have not been handled productively. i.e. You will struggle with mid life if childhood affairs were not handled appropriately. You will struggle in your life’s sunset years if mid life is not handled appropriately. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In numbering our days we ought to understand that opportunities, challenges and dynamics of day 2 presuppose the dutiful handling of day 1. Day 1 capacitates us for day 2 challenges and opportunities. The operative of life is cumulative and progressive. The idea is that age must come with maturity, wisdom, independence and stability. When age comes strolling alone the sight must be an eyesore to the engineer of life.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>An individual at 40 still grappling with adolescent challenges and opportunities is the travesty of life on two legs.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading -->\n<h2>The value of now is invaluable</h2>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Thus, the value of now is invaluable, its importance is incalculable. An appropriate and dutiful handling of now not only secures the meaning of life at present, but lays the foundation while giving direction and perspective to the series of prospective nows, whose succession is the unitary unfolding of the future. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Now has no intrinsic value, it doesn’t come with a truckload of goodies, it has nothing else to offer beyond the mere value of access to it. The value of now derives from our investment of it rather than investing in it. Invest now, don’t just expend it. It is too short-lived and transient in any case and the only means of drawing maximum profit from it is investing it as opposed to investing in it.\n<strong> The only to invest now is to derive permanence out of its transience (temporariness). </strong>\n</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Keep in mind that investing now and handling now productively do not imply the absence of failure. We may fail at one point or the other, but the object is to do our best to achieve set objectives. Remember this, God has NOT asked us to be successful, He has asked us to be faithful.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','The Value of Now','','inherit','closed','closed','','99704-revision-v1','','','2020-02-24 17:05:55','2020-02-24 15:05:55','',99704,'https://expound.org.za/99704-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99753,1,'2020-02-24 17:12:52','2020-02-24 15:12:52','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99705} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/the-value-of-now-768x1024.jpg\" alt=\"The Value of Now\" class=\"wp-image-99705\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading -->\n<h2>Achieving your goals one now at a time</h2>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>“Now” is not only the only link between the past and the future, the previous moment and next, but between your life trajectory, your plans and their unfolding. I can not emphasize this point enough. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>“Now” is the only link between ambition and accomplishment. This fact and consideration alone will turn our concept of “now” right on its head.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Let’s illustrate the point more.<br>\nLook at your life in general, look at the plans you have, look at your goals, nothing in the immediate or distant future, nothing remote (in time or process) will be accessible if “Now” fails. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The assignment that is due tomorrow will not be submitted if “now” is not handled appropriately and that may derail your entire academic goal. If you miss work today or now, your employment status is compromised at best or jeopardized at worst. If “now” goes South, tomorrow (if it comes to you) can be a whole new ball game.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The lofty ambitions and aspirations some of which we are already working on: are not accessible outside an appropriate and fruitful handling of “now”. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading -->\n<h2>There is a time for everything</h2>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The reason people fail to achieve long term goals or any goals in the long run, is that “now” looks unimportant, the value of now is hardly appreciated. Right “now” someone thinks that how they should handle “now” is optional. They could either get on to that important task as planned or they can rather tune up some movie on Netflix and shelve the important task for later. Now seems to have a plurality of options with regards to how it can be handled. However every purposeful individual bent on achieving set goals knows clearly that the principle of acing “now” is not optional. In the ecosystem of life there are no options really. There is time for everything and time to work is time for just one thing: to work! Time for play is time for just one thing: to play.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>“Now” is often despised as an unimportant passing moment whose mishandling can be easily corrected in the next moment. This is a big lie we tell ourselves. As a matter of fact there is no optimal access to later, or tomorrow, next week, next month, next year or any other lofty life milestone outside the efficacious handling of “NOW”. The many nows we have misused and many we have been lent have a fleeting influence that makes us think there will always be “next time”. Not true.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Between the gone and the coming “Now” is the only way forward, to a non guaranteed forward.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The foregoing is what gives context to, “To day if ye will hear his voice, Harden not your hearts.” Hebrews 11:7</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading -->\n<h2>Now is the only door to the next step in the ladder of life. </h2>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Top achievers will tell you that the key is not to focus on the overwhelming lofty end product but on the process. Do  you know what focusing on the process entails? It entails handling your series of nows productively.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A life of failure is in essence a series of mishandled nows. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Keep wasting one now after another, (through idleness, slothfulness or busywork) before you know it the misused nows will add up to wasted moments, hours, days, weeks, months and years. They amount to a wasted life. It will dawn then that just like success in life is not an accident, neither is failure. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>You are where you are today, right now according to how you thought, what you decided and what you did in your timeline’s old “nows”. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Right now, in this seemingly negligible moment of time called now, a great legacy is either being born or built or being aborted. Right now the obituary to be read at your funeral (perhaps many years from now) is being scripted silently. Right now your future is being formed and decided by you. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Take note, success will be a net outcome of a whooping series of aced nows, however don’t be overwhelmed by countless units of nows, right now you only have one now to deal with and this will always be the rhythm of your life. One now at a time.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:quote -->\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote\"><p><strong>Psalm 90: 12<br>  So teach us to number our days,<br>  That we may apply our hearts unto wisdom.</strong></p></blockquote>\n<!-- /wp:quote -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Note, David’s prayer is that we learn to number our days, not to count then. So the point is not about the collective quantifying of the days but progressive living. Counting would imply mere quantifying while numbering implies progression. In other words day 1 lays the foundation for day 2, and day 2 lays the foundation for day 3 and so forth. <br>\nNumbering our days means that our lives are closed systems as opposed to open ended systems. A closed system has an A to Z structure. <br>\nThe tragedy of life is when you are on day 8 and days 1 to 7 have not been handled productively. i.e. You will struggle with mid life if childhood affairs were not handled appropriately. You will struggle in your life’s sunset years if mid life is not handled appropriately. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In numbering our days we ought to understand that opportunities, challenges and dynamics of day 2 presuppose the dutiful handling of day 1. Day 1 capacitates us for day 2 challenges and opportunities. The operative of life is cumulative and progressive. The idea is that age must come with maturity, wisdom, independence and stability. When age comes strolling alone the sight must be an eyesore to the engineer of life.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>An individual at 40 still grappling with adolescent challenges and opportunities is the travesty of life on two legs.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading -->\n<h2>The value of now is invaluable</h2>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Thus, the value of now is invaluable, its importance is incalculable. An appropriate and dutiful handling of now not only secures the meaning of life at present, but lays the foundation while giving direction and perspective to the series of prospective nows, whose succession is the unitary unfolding of the future. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Now has no intrinsic value, it doesn’t come with a truckload of goodies, it has nothing else to offer beyond the mere value of access to it. The value of now derives from our investment of it rather than investing in it. Invest now, don’t just expend it. It is too short-lived and transient in any case and the only means of drawing maximum profit from it is investing it as opposed to investing in it.\n<strong> The only way to invest now is to derive permanence out of its transience (temporariness). </strong>\n</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Keep in mind that investing now and handling now productively do not imply the absence of failure. We may fail at one point or the other, but the object is to do our best to achieve set objectives. Remember this, God has NOT asked us to be successful, He has asked us to be faithful.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','The Value of Now','','inherit','closed','closed','','99704-revision-v1','','','2020-02-24 17:12:52','2020-02-24 15:12:52','',99704,'https://expound.org.za/99704-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99754,1,'2020-02-24 17:19:41','2020-02-24 15:19:41','<h3><span style=\"color: #008000;\"><em>Death, the dry dreary dread of the living.</em></span></h3>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Death, I have not known you but I do know you.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">As I mull over your inscrutable business my point of departure is a crashing halt.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You know how to break hearts, you know how to tear souls apart.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You are a thief with a middle name and a surname.You steal, you kill and you destroy.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You have no good reputation to maintain. You care not what adjectival prefixes are conferred upon your morose noun.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Call you untimely death, premature death, You simply won’t be bothered. You are unstoppable in your morbid hocus-pocus.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">“Worst timing” is your strategic plan. Without an invite you come in. Without notice you arrive. Every home is your home. In every family you are that member who dismembers.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Every birth is an irresistible invite to you, it’s a matter of when not if before you grace the occasion of everyone’s life with your disgrace.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Clumsiness is your preferred precision. Disrepute is your reputation.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Your track record are your stealthy untraceable bloody steps to whomsoever is surely next.</span>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #008000;\"><em>Death,The dry dreary dread of the living.</em></span></h3>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Death you are tone-deaf to occasion.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You employ gate crushing for your grand entrance. You have no struggle in getting attention. Disruption is your hallmark and wrecking havoc is your clinical act.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You rearrange the agenda of the day without consultation. You hardly attend planning meetings but when you rock up your orders are not optional.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You are delivered unordered and when you land disorder is the order of the day.</span>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #008000;\"><em>Death,The dry dreary dread of the living.</em></span></h3>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Our teary eyes and agonies of tragedy are your daily fix, you giggle when we mourn not only because you have struck but more so because you will most certainly come back.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You delight in hand crafting tragedy and human misery is your masterpiece.You are deft in subverting reality.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Death listen, your incurable oxymorons are not funny.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You make children motherless and Fathers childless. Your linguistic jokes are killing us literally.</span>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #008000;\"><em>Death, the dry dreary dread of the living,</em></span></h3>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">But don’t be too cocky yet. I know your power. You thrive in human ignorance.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Those who don’t know God know not your limits nor your glorious fate.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You are a terrorist par excellence. Terror is your operative, you blast unexpecting victims and casualties to their wits end and you strike fear for a living.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">“You will never see your dead loved ones again....” is the gospel truth of your puerile heap of lies with which you haunt and hound the unbelieving minds of many.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">To those who don’t know that your sting is temporary... your blow is permanent.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">When you strike, some suffer mere sadness and some sheer devastation.The difference is Jesus.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">To those who know the end game, your conclusion is not conclusive.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Death listen, your blows are fatal yet not final. You will ultimately grin and grimace at your grim lifetime career in death-craft when at last the casualties you have in cemeteries lined up are thrown an eternal lifeline.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">The resurrection morning will summarily undo your gory to-do list. The grand union of parted loved ones will be the high definition undoing of your doing.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">I have been keen to hear what your response shall be to the question, “Where oh death is your sting?” until it dawned to me that at that point the question will be mere rhetoric.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">By then you would have shamefacedly shoved your creepy tail betwixt your ugly, scandalous and unwelcome legs and self destructed into eternal oblivion.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">For when the tables turn then it will be your turn.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Oh, When I peep into the future then I see that your deathly paws have a paucity of wisdom and your deadly claws are clueless for ultimately your last casualty is yourself.</span>\n\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Oh Death, I have not known you but I do know you.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You surely look and loom invincible for now, but I know ultimately your end is more permanent than your sting.</span>','Death','','inherit','closed','closed','','99715-revision-v1','','','2020-02-24 17:19:41','2020-02-24 15:19:41','',99715,'https://expound.org.za/99715-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99756,1,'2020-02-24 17:23:20','2020-02-24 15:23:20','<h3><span style=\"color: #008000;\"><em>Death, the dry dreary dread of the living.</em></span></h3>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Death, I have not known you but I do know you.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">As I mull over your inscrutable business my point of departure is a crashing halt.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You know how to break hearts, you know how to tear souls apart.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You are a thief with a middle name and a surname.You steal, you kill and you destroy.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You have no good reputation to maintain. You care not what adjectival prefixes are conferred upon your morose noun.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Call you untimely death, premature death, You simply won’t be bothered. You are unstoppable in your morbid hocus-pocus.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">“Worst timing” is your strategic plan. Without an invite you come in. Without notice you arrive. Every home is your home. In every family you are that member who dismembers.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Every birth is an irresistible invite to you, it’s a matter of when not if before you grace the occasion of everyone’s life with your disgrace.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Clumsiness is your preferred precision. Disrepute is your reputation.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Your track record are your stealthy untraceable bloody steps to whomsoever is surely next.</span>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #008000;\"><em>Death,The dry dreary dread of the living.</em></span></h3>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Death you are tone-deaf to occasion.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You employ gate crushing for your grand entrance. You have no struggle in getting attention. Disruption is your hallmark and wrecking havoc is your clinical act.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You rearrange the agenda of the day without consultation. You hardly attend planning meetings but when you rock up your orders are not optional.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You are delivered unordered and when you land disorder is the order of the day.</span>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #008000;\"><em>Death,The dry dreary dread of the living.</em></span></h3>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Our teary eyes and agonies of tragedy are your daily fix, you giggle when we mourn not only because you have struck but more so because you will most certainly come back.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You delight in hand crafting tragedy and human misery is your mastered masterpiece.You are deft in subverting reality.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Death listen, your incurable oxymorons are not funny.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You make children motherless and Fathers childless. Your linguistic jokes are killing us literally.</span>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #008000;\"><em>Death, the dry dreary dread of the living,</em></span></h3>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">But don’t be too cocky yet. I know your power. You thrive in human ignorance.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Those who don’t know God know not your limits nor your glorious fate.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You are a terrorist par excellence. Terror is your operative, you blast unexpecting victims and casualties to their wits end, You strike fear for a living.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">“You will never see your dead loved ones again....” is the gospel truth of your puerile heap of lies with which you haunt and hound the unbelieving minds of many.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">To those who don’t know that your sting is temporary... your blow is permanent.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">When you strike, some suffer mere sadness and some sheer devastation.The difference is Jesus.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">To those who know the end game, your conclusion is not conclusive.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Death listen, your blows are fatal yet not final. You will ultimately grin and grimace at your grim lifetime career in death-craft when at last the casualties you have in cemeteries lined up are thrown an eternal lifeline.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">The resurrection morning will summarily undo your gory to-do list. The grand union of parted loved ones will be the high definition undoing of your doing.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">I have been keen to hear what your response shall be to the question, “Where oh death is your sting?” until it dawned to me that at that point the question will be mere rhetoric.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">By then you would have shamefacedly shoved your creepy tail betwixt your ugly, scandalous and unwelcome legs and self destructed into eternal oblivion.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">For when the tables turn then it will be your turn.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Oh, When I peep into the future then I see that your deathly paws have a paucity of wisdom and your deadly claws are clueless for ultimately your last casualty is yourself.</span>\n\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Oh Death, I have not known you but I do know you.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You surely look and loom invincible for now, but I know ultimately your end is more permanent than your sting.</span>','Death','','inherit','closed','closed','','99715-revision-v1','','','2020-02-24 17:23:20','2020-02-24 15:23:20','',99715,'https://expound.org.za/99715-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99755,1,'2020-02-24 17:20:46','2020-02-24 15:20:46','<h3><span style=\"color: #008000;\"><em>Death, the dry dreary dread of the living.</em></span></h3>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Death, I have not known you but I do know you.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">As I mull over your inscrutable business my point of departure is a crashing halt.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You know how to break hearts, you know how to tear souls apart.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You are a thief with a middle name and a surname.You steal, you kill and you destroy.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You have no good reputation to maintain. You care not what adjectival prefixes are conferred upon your morose noun.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Call you untimely death, premature death, You simply won’t be bothered. You are unstoppable in your morbid hocus-pocus.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">“Worst timing” is your strategic plan. Without an invite you come in. Without notice you arrive. Every home is your home. In every family you are that member who dismembers.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Every birth is an irresistible invite to you, it’s a matter of when not if before you grace the occasion of everyone’s life with your disgrace.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Clumsiness is your preferred precision. Disrepute is your reputation.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Your track record are your stealthy untraceable bloody steps to whomsoever is surely next.</span>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #008000;\"><em>Death,The dry dreary dread of the living.</em></span></h3>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Death you are tone-deaf to occasion.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You employ gate crushing for your grand entrance. You have no struggle in getting attention. Disruption is your hallmark and wrecking havoc is your clinical act.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You rearrange the agenda of the day without consultation. You hardly attend planning meetings but when you rock up your orders are not optional.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You are delivered unordered and when you land disorder is the order of the day.</span>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #008000;\"><em>Death,The dry dreary dread of the living.</em></span></h3>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Our teary eyes and agonies of tragedy are your daily fix, you giggle when we mourn not only because you have struck but more so because you will most certainly come back.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You delight in hand crafting tragedy and human misery is your mastered masterpiece.You are deft in subverting reality.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Death listen, your incurable oxymorons are not funny.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You make children motherless and Fathers childless. Your linguistic jokes are killing us literally.</span>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #008000;\"><em>Death, the dry dreary dread of the living,</em></span></h3>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">But don’t be too cocky yet. I know your power. You thrive in human ignorance.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Those who don’t know God know not your limits nor your glorious fate.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You are a terrorist par excellence. Terror is your operative, you blast unexpecting victims and casualties to their wits end and you strike fear for a living.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">“You will never see your dead loved ones again....” is the gospel truth of your puerile heap of lies with which you haunt and hound the unbelieving minds of many.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">To those who don’t know that your sting is temporary... your blow is permanent.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">When you strike, some suffer mere sadness and some sheer devastation.The difference is Jesus.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">To those who know the end game, your conclusion is not conclusive.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Death listen, your blows are fatal yet not final. You will ultimately grin and grimace at your grim lifetime career in death-craft when at last the casualties you have in cemeteries lined up are thrown an eternal lifeline.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">The resurrection morning will summarily undo your gory to-do list. The grand union of parted loved ones will be the high definition undoing of your doing.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">I have been keen to hear what your response shall be to the question, “Where oh death is your sting?” until it dawned to me that at that point the question will be mere rhetoric.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">By then you would have shamefacedly shoved your creepy tail betwixt your ugly, scandalous and unwelcome legs and self destructed into eternal oblivion.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">For when the tables turn then it will be your turn.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Oh, When I peep into the future then I see that your deathly paws have a paucity of wisdom and your deadly claws are clueless for ultimately your last casualty is yourself.</span>\n\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Oh Death, I have not known you but I do know you.</span>\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You surely look and loom invincible for now, but I know ultimately your end is more permanent than your sting.</span>','Death','','inherit','closed','closed','','99715-revision-v1','','','2020-02-24 17:20:46','2020-02-24 15:20:46','',99715,'https://expound.org.za/99715-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99758,2,'2020-02-26 20:16:41','2020-02-26 18:16:41','I followed you on Twitter, sent tweets and you didn\'t reply and made me look like a twit.\r\nI tried to send a poke on Facebook but you treated me as an Adventist would treat pork.\r\nI was old school and sent you my letters but all I have are these envelopes written return to sender.\r\n\r\nBound in fetters I found you, \r\nloosed them and removed your rags of leather.\r\nI robed you in fine linen but now you flee from me as if I robed without meaning.\r\nNowadays you dodge my love like you dodge the credit collectors,\r\nDodging me like I\'m the police and you are the foreigner without papers,\r\nFearing me like a businessman fears SARS if all his assets ain\'t on paper.\r\nFleeing me as if I got fleas around me like a leper.\r\n\r\nYou do me wrong and live, \r\nBreak all promises and think you are a pro at this.\r\nEskom doesn\'t even have your house on the grid, you live in meager means to put it politely.\r\nYour neighbors believe your life is a TV show of survivor: the urban edition.\r\nYou, pray when you have guests just so you make them believe your hungering is a holy fast.\r\nI set you to be the salt of the earth but you chose to be the ordinary herb thyme and not add any flavor to the world!\r\n\r\nRolex Swiss, Bvlgari Italian, Casio Japanese watches you wear and you think you have all the time in the world!\r\n\r\nWho can redeem lost time?\r\nTry turning back the hands of the clock backward and what you have is the wrong time!\r\nCome whilst there is time,\r\nIn my house is bread, fruit, nourishment, raiment, if only you would stop in your steps I would restore you to this golden manor!\r\n','To whom it may concern','','inherit','closed','closed','','99757-revision-v1','','','2020-02-26 20:16:41','2020-02-26 18:16:41','',99757,'https://expound.org.za/99757-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99814,1,'2020-03-06 10:51:15','2020-03-06 08:51:15','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99784} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99784\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3 style=\"text-align:justify!important;\">Self is the invariable abattoir where many relationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Just like the old adage goes, it takes two to tango. In any given relationship paradigm there are at least two entities (persons) involved. A relationship is a social real estate whose ecosystem is the sum total of the net contributions of the two persons involved. The relationship stands apart as an independent entity which feeds on a diet radically different from that of its constituent persons, for it not just to survive but to flourish. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are certain things that are otherwise optional and yet compulsory for a relationship to work. You mean like really “compulsory” when it’s a relationship of two consenting adults? Indeed! Communication, intimacy, trust, respect, love, submission etc constitute the mandatory diet the relationship cannot live without. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Relationships fail because people confuse their personal needs and preferences for the needs of the relationship. Because of this grave mistake, persons then tend to think that needs of their relationships (which in many cases are confused for personal preferences and idiosyncrasies), are optional. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the thing, maybe you don’t like to communicate, perhaps you don’t feel like investing in quality time with your partner, or it could be that you have genuine trust issues, and maybe you struggle with respect, love, submission etc, however as far as the survival and flourishing of your relationship is concerned these aspects are neither optional nor negotiable.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99795} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/common-reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99795\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It helps to understand and view the relationship as an entity separate from its persons just like it is with a business concept. Most of us understand that the moment you start running a business on personal preferences and whims at that very moment you have killed it. You may not like sales,&nbsp; or marketing management or even financial literacy, etc, however your enterprise needs a diligent praxis of these disciplines to survive and grow. As far as the survival and growth of your business is concerned these aspects are not negotiable. If you can\'t appreciate that then do not run a business.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work. If you are caught up in this rigmarole, what you are seeking to do is as futile as trying to lobby reality for custom settings. Adults caught up in this predicament are essentially adolescents trapped in big people’s bodies. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The shallow concept of mutual consent is another problem</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The issue of mutual consent in this context pertains to the essentials that keep the relationship growing and thriving and not anything untoward as it were. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the standard grade appreciation of the basis of functional relationships: Mutual Consent on initiatives or propositions. This simply refers to getting the buy-in of your partner for whatever you seek to do or accomplish with him/her. Quite straight forward this, no rattles nor blisters here. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>However, there is a higher grade appreciation of the basis of not only functional but flourishing relationships:&nbsp; Comprehensive Mutual Consent i.e. mutual consent on the both axes of propositioning as well as declining.  This refers to mutual consent being exercised on both ends of the communicative transaction. In other words, the one making an initiative seeks mutual consent of the other party and the target of the motion also seeks mutual consent in a case where the bid is declined. The fact is understandably quite elusive to many.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>We tend to emphasize consent on one end and yet de-emphasize it on other. For example, if your partner wants to spend time or take a walk with you, usually the default setting is to check if you are in the mood or if you would like to do that or not, whereas a negotiated consensual, loving and mutual turn down will serve the relationship better than a self-conceived, monocratic, unilateral  and a veto-powered \"No\". When confronted with a decision making process that has a bearing on the relationship, the question to ask is not: \"Do I want to do this or not?\", the appropriate question to ask is, \"Does the relationship need this or not?\" A balanced way forward should be negotiated within that premise.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong> Many people tend to exercise veto power (unilateral decision making) in declining propositions or initiatives. This is the low hanging fruit of the insidious plague of self-centeredness. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>You will surely win the argument but lose the relationship</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember the sharpness of your argument for, or against it (whatever the initiative is) is completely irrelevant and lopsided if the needs of the significant other are trivialized. If you persist, you will surely win the argument but lose the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract where in you get what you want and do not get what you do not want in the context of comprehensive mutual consent. A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract where you get what you want which serves the relationship. Among many other equally important factors, failure to understand and live by the principle of comprehensive mutual consent is the major reason why relationships fail. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Mental Hygiene on Why Relationships Fail','','inherit','closed','closed','','99783-revision-v1','','','2020-03-06 10:51:15','2020-03-06 08:51:15','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/99783-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99762,1,'2020-02-27 23:36:33','2020-02-27 21:36:33','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99763} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/parable-of-talents.jpg\" alt=\"The parable of talents commentry\" class=\"wp-image-99763\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In Matthew 25: 14-30 we are given a reverting account of a wealthy master who entrusted a measure of his wealth (in form of talents) among three of his  servants before going to a far away country. Just like it is with any parable given by Jesus, <a href=\"https://expound.org.za/job-chapter-1-part-1/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" aria-label=\"fiction looms more powerful than reality (opens in a new tab)\">fiction looms more powerful than reality</a> as narrative artistry gave Jesus latitude to poignantly illuminate complexes of human life in a manner that underscored His intimate proximity to the detail of human misery, wretchedness and potential under divine empowerment. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Revisit the parable: Matthew 25: 14-30 and then consider the following eight (8) cogent lessons we can draw from the account.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n \n<h3> 1. The measure of faithfulness and success is not safe keeping but increase. </h3>\nThe productive servants were called good and\nfaithful. Thus, to be “good and faithful” in the eyes of God has more to do\nwith multiplication and fruitfulness that it has to do with safe keeping as\nexemplified by the third servant who merely buried the talent for safe keeping.\nGod is not pleased when we aim for the bare minimum. \n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 2. Be fruitful and multiply </h3>\nThroughout the bible God employs the farming motif the basis of which is the imperative given to human beings and all creatures: “Be fruitful and Multiply”.&nbsp;\nGen 1:28 The master declared the first two servants as good and faithful\nbecause they had achieved the very object of every created creature: to\nmultiply and to be fruitful. The imperative is hardly exclusive to\nreproduction. God expects His children to multiply in all aspects of life. In\nJohn 15: 1-2 Jesus says, “I am the true vine and my Father is the husbandman. 2\nEvery branch in me that does not bear fruit He purges it and every branch in me\nthat bears fruit He purges that it may bring forth more fruit. The object of\nthe farming and fruit bearing motifs is aptly illumined in Galatians 5: 22.\nChildren of God must bear fruit and in Galatians 5:22 the combo of the expected\nfruitage is unpacked: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance,\nkindness, goodness, faithfulness.” &nbsp;Now\nthe question to be raised is: what are fruits for? Fruits are food, and thus\nthe fruit is for nourishment of the children of God. The purpose of fruit\nbearing is nourishment.\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 3. A talent is not an achievement </h3>\nAchievement is the outcome of a purposeful application of the “talent”. Natural\nendowments such as beauty, height, influence, eloquence, material belongings,\netc are not an achievement as it were. Achievement is the net outcome of the\nproductive and beneficial use of these talents or gifts.\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 4. God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful </h3>\n\nMany fear failure and are reluctant to go forward at God’s charge. We forget that God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful. The determination of whether one has failed or has succeeded is not premised on the outcomes. When we obey we have succeeded, when we disobey we have failed. Take note that it is the parable of talents and not the parable of the talented. As we like to say, if it’s God’s will He will pay the bill, He has provision for every vision and all His biddings are his enablings. “As the will of man co-operates with the\nwill of God, it becomes omnipotent. Whatever is to be done at His command, may\nbe accomplished in His strength. All His biddings are enablings.” Ellen G.\nWhite. Christ\'s Object Lessons, 333.\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 5. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness </h3>\nWhat we would habitually classify as laziness or mediocrity is addressed aptly by its first name. The unproductive servant is addressed as: “Thou wicked and slothful servant”. \n[signinlocker id=\"99519\"]\nThe master did not mince his words. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness. The master employed categoric descriptors to unmask the slothful servant and to succinctly “un”sugar coat the dead salt of wickedness underlying his conspicuous languor. If we consider the end of the story, the servant is not referred to some entrepreneurial development workshop or investment seminar for his up-skilling or rehabilitation. He is decisively cast into outer darkness where there is weeping and gnashing of teeth. Why such a seemingly exacting and harsh action from the\nmaster for a “small” matter of non-performance at best and laziness at worst? Fact\nof the matter is that laziness is our “acceptable” demon of wickedness. In the\nthralldom of laziness and slothfulness lies the same demonic species of ungodliness\nand wickedness as verily resident in the hue of rape, murder, adultery and all\nother hideous forms of sin which are visibly deplorable and revolting. \n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 6. God is the foundation of everything </h3>\n\nThe faithful servants referenced what the master had given them before enumerating their yield. This is crucial. Firstly,God is the foundation of everything. Secondly, God’s expectations are reasonable because they are predicated by provision. i.e. God does not demand an account over nothing. Life as a gift from God in itself. It is the foundation of everything and everyone who has breath in their nostrils can do something. The unfaithful servant did NOT make mention of the single talent given to him. The point of departure in his self-pitying response is to decimate the character of the master. He alleges: “I knew thee that thou art an hard man, reaping where thou hast not sown, and gathering where thou hast not sown.”\nWhile the unfaithful servant’s reportage takes off by decimating and vilifying\nthe character of the master, the attitude of the two faithful servants exudes\ngratitude as the appropriate point of departure. You may not have everything\nyou have wished for and desired but just take a moment to look around you and count your blessings. Perhaps you are frustrated over unfinished business and undone tasks but hey, today is another day God has granted us, a day we did not have to pay for, a fresh new chance we do not deserve. The least we can do is to seize the opportunity thankfully with both hands and gear up to deliver. A positive attitude trumps aptitude in the general ecosystem of life. \n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 7. There is no excuse for non-performance </h3>\nThe unfaithful servant attempted to contextualize and rationalize his indolent station on the basis of the alleged crudeness of the master’s character. (Matt 25:24) The master could have easily nullified his line of reasoning by simply reminding him that the task at hand had nothing to do with the hardness of master or any the imaginary traits the servant is expostulating about, the task was to\nmultiply the talent. But the master decided to tag along his futile and evasive\nline of thinking and prove that the logical end of his own reasoning is that he\ntherefore should have invested the talent as his perception of the master’s\ncharacter gave him more reason to invest that not to. In a nutshell, the master\nis saying to the servant “your reasons for non-performance are neither here nor\nthere”.&nbsp; The same is true for all our wafer-thin excuses for non-performance. They are neither here nor there.\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 8. Dissimilar Capabilities (Talents) Equal Exponentiality  </h3>\nDid you notice that the two faithful servants had 100% yields in their entrepreneurship? What that means is that the one with five talents did not bask in the laurels. He did not sit back and gloat over his lot for he understood that the five talents were not achievement but mere seed. He understood principle number one highlighted above that the measure of success and faithfulness is not safe keeping but increase (fruitfulness). The one with two talents did not nurse any gripe over being less endowed, He gratefully embraced what was allotted to him and similarly hit the ground running, thus both of them achieved 100% yield. \n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The reason people tend to worship outstandingly successful\npeople is because any trail blazing persona will tower like a demi-god to a\nfull time under achiever. The more we inch to the summit in our different\nspheres the less we covet, revere and venerate genius, and in fact the more we\nbegin to appreciate the fact that genius is not a specialized or exclusive\nendowment but the basic defining operative of persistent, resilient and diligent\npurposeful living. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Knowledge and skill are neither innate nor hardwired, they are acquired. The ability to acquire knowledge productively is developed and can be developed by anyone, it is honed in the grind of resilience and consistency.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Let me close off with a trenchant volley from an inspired\nauthor, </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>“Many whom God has qualified to do excellent work accomplish\nvery little, because they attempt little. Thousands pass through life as if\nthey had no definite object for which to live, no standard to reach. Such will\nobtain a reward proportionate to their works. Remember that you will never\nreach a higher standard than you yourself set. . . . Press with determination\nin the right direction, and circumstances will be your helpers, not your\nhindrances.” Ellen G. White Christ Object Lessons 331, 332)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Over to you. Ever spent some time on the Parable of Talents?\nWhat stood out for you? Please share your reflections on the comments section\nbelow. </p>\n\n[/signinlocker]\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','UnSugar Coating Dead Salt: 8 Lessons from the Parable of Talents','','publish','open','open','','parable-of-talents-commentry','','\nhttps://expound.org.za/job-chapter-1-part-1/','2020-02-28 08:08:12','2020-02-28 06:08:12','',0,'https://expound.org.za/?p=99762',0,'post','',0),(99763,1,'2020-02-27 23:36:01','2020-02-27 21:36:01','','parable-of-talents','','inherit','open','closed','','parable-of-talents','','','2020-02-27 23:36:01','2020-02-27 21:36:01','',99762,'https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/parable-of-talents.jpg',0,'attachment','image/jpeg',0),(99764,1,'2020-02-27 23:36:33','2020-02-27 21:36:33','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99763} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/parable-of-talents.jpg\" alt=\"The parable of talents commentry\" class=\"wp-image-99763\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In Mathew 25: 14-30 we are given a reverting account of a wealthy master who entrusted a measure of his wealth (in form of talents) among three of his  servants before going to a far away country. Just like any parable given by Jesus, fiction looms more powerful than reality as narrative artistry gave Jesus latitude to poignantly illuminate complexes of human life that underscore His intimate proximity to the detail of human misery, wretchedness and potential under divine empowerment. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Revisit the parable: Mathew 25: 14-30 and then consider the following\neight (8) cogent lessons we can draw from the account.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<ol><li> <h3> The measure of faithfulness and success </h3>\nis not safe keeping but increase. The productive servants were called good and\nfaithful. Thus, to be “good and faithful” in the eyes of God has more to do\nwith multiplication and fruitfulness that it has to do with safe keeping as\nexemplified by the third servant who merely buried the talent for safe keeping.\nGod is not pleased when we aim for the bare minimum. </li><li>Be fruitful and multiply.&nbsp; Throughout the bible God employs the farming\nmotif the basis of which is the imperative given to human beings and all\ncreatures: “Be fruitful and Multiply”.&nbsp;\nGen 1:28 The master declared the first two servants as good and faithful\nbecause they had achieved the very object of every created creature: to\nmultiply and to be fruitful. The imperative is hardly exclusive to\nreproduction. God expects His children to multiply in all aspects of life. In\nJohn 15: 1-2 Jesus says, “I am the true vine and my Father is the husbandman. 2\nEvery branch in me that does not bear fruit He purges it and every branch in me\nthat bears fruit He purges that it may bring forth more fruit. The object of\nthe farming and fruit bearing motifs is aptly illumined in Galatians 5: 22.\nChildren of God must bear fruit and in Galatians 5:22 the combo of the expected\nfruitage is unpacked: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance,\nkindness, goodness, faithfulness.” &nbsp;Now\nthe question to be raised is: what are fruits for? Fruits are food, and thus\nthe fruit is for nourishment of the children of God. The purpose of fruit\nbearing is nourishment.</li><li>A talent is not an achievement.\nAchievement is the outcome of a purposeful application of the “talent”. Natural\nendowments such as beauty, height, influence, eloquence, material belongings,\netc are not an achievement as it were. Achievement is the net outcome of the\nproductive and beneficial use of these talents or gifts.</li><li>Many fear failure and are reluctant to\ngo forward at God’s charge. We forget that God has not asked us to be\nsuccessful, He Has only asked us to be faithful. The determination of whether\none has failed or has succeeded is not premised on the outcomes. When we obey\nwe have succeeded, when we disobey we have failed. Take note that it is the\nparable of talents and not the parable of the talented. As we like to say, if it’s\nGod’s will He will pay the bill, He has provision for every vision and all His biddings are his enablings.\n&nbsp;“As the will of man co-operates with the\nwill of God, it becomes omnipotent. Whatever is to be done at His command, may\nbe accomplished in His strength. All His biddings are enablings.” Ellen G.\nWhite. Christ\'s Object Lessons, 333.</li></ol>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:list -->\n<ul><li>\n<h3> Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness </h3>\nWhat we would habitually classify as laziness\nor mediocrity is addressed aptly by its first name. The unproductive servant is\naddressed as: “Thou wicked and slothful servant”. The master did not mince his\nwords. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness. The\nmaster employed categoric descriptors to unmask the slothful servant and to succinctly\n“un”sugar coat the dead salt of wickedness underlying his conspicuous languor.\nIf we consider the end of the story, the servant is not referred to some entrepreneurial\ndevelopment workshop or investment seminar for his up-skilling or\nrehabilitation. He is decisively cast into outer darkness where there is weeping\nand gnashing of teeth. Why such a seemingly exacting and harsh action from the\nmaster for a “small” matter of non-performance at best and laziness at worst? Fact\nof the matter is that laziness is our “acceptable” demon of wickedness. In the\nthralldom of laziness and slothfulness lies the same demonic species of ungodliness\nand wickedness as verily resident in the hue of rape, murder, adultery and all\nother hideous forms of sin which are visibly deplorable and revolting. </li><li>The faithful servants referenced what\nthe master had given them before enumerating their yield. This is crucial. Firstly,\nGod is the foundation of everything. Secondly, God’s expectations are\nreasonable because they are predicated by provision. i.e. God does not demand\nan account over nothing. Life as a gift from God in itself. It is the\nfoundation of everything and everyone who has breath in their nostrils can do\nsomething. The unfaithful servant did NOT make mention of the single talent\ngiven to him. The point of departure in his self-pitying response is to\ndecimate the character of the master. He alleges: “I knew thee that thou art an\nhard man, reaping where thou hast not sown, and gathering where thou hast not sown.”\nWhile the unfaithful servant’s reportage takes off by decimating and vilifying\nthe character of the master, the attitude of the two faithful servants exudes\ngratitude as the appropriate point of departure. You may not have everything\nyou have wished for and desired but just take a moment to look around you and count\nyour blessings. Perhaps you are frustrated over unfinished business and undone tasks\nbut hey, today is another day God has granted us, a day we did not have to pay\nfor, a fresh new chance we do not deserve. The least we can do is to seize the\nopportunity thankfully with both hands and gear up to deliver. A positive attitude\ntrumps aptitude in the general ecosystem of life. </li><li> <h3> There is no excuse for non-performance </h3>\nThe unfaithful servant attempted to contextualize and rationalize his indolent station on the basis of the alleged crudeness of the master’s character. (Matt 25:24) The master could have easily nullified his line of reasoning by simply reminding him that the task at hand had nothing to do with the hardness of master or any the imaginary traits the servant is expostulating about, the task was to\nmultiply the talent. But the master decided to tag along his futile and evasive\nline of thinking and prove that the logical end of his own reasoning is that he\ntherefore should have invested the talent as his perception of the master’s\ncharacter gave him more reason to invest that not to. In a nutshell, the master\nis saying to the servant “your reasons for non-performance are neither here nor\nthere”.&nbsp; The same is true for all our wafer-thin excuses for non-performance. They are neither here nor there.</li><li> <h3> Dissimilar Capabilities (Talents) Equitable Yeild </h3>\nDid you notice that the two faithful servants had 100% yields in their entrepreneurship? What that means is that the one with five talents did not bask in the laurels. He did not sit back and gloat over his lot for he understood that the five talents were not achievement but mere\nseed. He understood principle number one highlighted above that the measure of\nsuccess and faithfulness is not safe keeping but increase (fruitfulness). The\none with two talents did not nurse any gripe over being less endowed, He\ngratefully embraced what was allotted to him and similarly hit the ground\nrunning, thus both of them achieved 100% yield. </li></ul>\n<!-- /wp:list -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The reason people tend to worship outstandingly successful\npeople is because any trail blazing persona will tower like a demi-god to a\nfull time under achiever. The more we inch to the summit in our different\nspheres the less we covet, revere and venerate genius, and in fact the more we\nbegin to appreciate the fact that genius is not a specialized or exclusive\nendowment but the basic defining operative of persistent, resilient and diligent\npurposeful living. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Knowledge and skill are neither innate nor hardwired, they\nare acquired. The ability to acquire knowledge productively is developed can be\ndeveloped by anyone, it is honed in the grind of resilience and consistency.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Let me close off with a trenchant volley from an inspired\nauthor, </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>“Many whom God has qualified to do excellent work accomplish\nvery little, because they attempt little. Thousands pass through life as if\nthey had no definite object for which to live, no standard to reach. Such will\nobtain a reward proportionate to their works. Remember that you will never\nreach a higher standard than you yourself set. . . . Press with determination\nin the right direction, and circumstances will be your helpers, not your\nhindrances.” Ellen G. White Christ Object Lessons 331, 332)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Over to you. Ever spent some time on the Parable of Talents?\nWhat stood out for you? Please share your reflections on the comments section\nbelow. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','UnSugar Coating Dead Salt: 8 Lessons from the Parable of Talents','','inherit','closed','closed','','99762-revision-v1','','','2020-02-27 23:36:33','2020-02-27 21:36:33','',99762,'https://expound.org.za/99762-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99767,1,'2020-02-27 23:46:49','2020-02-27 21:46:49','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99763} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/parable-of-talents.jpg\" alt=\"The parable of talents commentry\" class=\"wp-image-99763\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In Mathew 25: 14-30 we are given a reverting account of a wealthy master who entrusted a measure of his wealth (in form of talents) among three of his  servants before going to a far away country. Just like any parable given by Jesus, fiction looms more powerful than reality as narrative artistry gave Jesus latitude to poignantly illuminate complexes of human life that underscore His intimate proximity to the detail of human misery, wretchedness and potential under divine empowerment. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Revisit the parable: Mathew 25: 14-30 and then consider the following nine (9) cogent lessons we can draw from the account.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n \n<h3> 1. The measure of faithfulness and success is not safe keeping but increase. </h3>\nThe productive servants were called good and\nfaithful. Thus, to be “good and faithful” in the eyes of God has more to do\nwith multiplication and fruitfulness that it has to do with safe keeping as\nexemplified by the third servant who merely buried the talent for safe keeping.\nGod is not pleased when we aim for the bare minimum. \n<h3> 2. Be fruitful and multiply </h3>\nThroughout the bible God employs the farming motif the basis of which is the imperative given to human beings and all creatures: “Be fruitful and Multiply”.&nbsp;\nGen 1:28 The master declared the first two servants as good and faithful\nbecause they had achieved the very object of every created creature: to\nmultiply and to be fruitful. The imperative is hardly exclusive to\nreproduction. God expects His children to multiply in all aspects of life. In\nJohn 15: 1-2 Jesus says, “I am the true vine and my Father is the husbandman. 2\nEvery branch in me that does not bear fruit He purges it and every branch in me\nthat bears fruit He purges that it may bring forth more fruit. The object of\nthe farming and fruit bearing motifs is aptly illumined in Galatians 5: 22.\nChildren of God must bear fruit and in Galatians 5:22 the combo of the expected\nfruitage is unpacked: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance,\nkindness, goodness, faithfulness.” &nbsp;Now\nthe question to be raised is: what are fruits for? Fruits are food, and thus\nthe fruit is for nourishment of the children of God. The purpose of fruit\nbearing is nourishment.\n\n<h3> 3. A talent is not an achievement </h3>\nAchievement is the outcome of a purposeful application of the “talent”. Natural\nendowments such as beauty, height, influence, eloquence, material belongings,\netc are not an achievement as it were. Achievement is the net outcome of the\nproductive and beneficial use of these talents or gifts.\n<h3> 4. God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful </h3>\n\nMany fear failure and are reluctant to go forward at God’s charge. We forget that God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful. The determination of whether one has failed or has succeeded is not premised on the outcomes. When we obey we have succeeded, when we disobey we have failed. Take note that it is the parable of talents and not the parable of the talented. As we like to say, if it’s God’s will He will pay the bill, He has provision for every vision and all His biddings are his enablings. “As the will of man co-operates with the\nwill of God, it becomes omnipotent. Whatever is to be done at His command, may\nbe accomplished in His strength. All His biddings are enablings.” Ellen G.\nWhite. Christ\'s Object Lessons, 333.\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n\n<h3> 6. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness </h3>\nWhat we would habitually classify as laziness or mediocrity is addressed aptly by its first name. The unproductive servant is addressed as: “Thou wicked and slothful servant”. The master did not mince his words. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness. The master employed categoric descriptors to unmask the slothful servant and to succinctly “un”sugar coat the dead salt of wickedness underlying his conspicuous languor. If we consider the end of the story, the servant is not referred to some entrepreneurial development workshop or investment seminar for his up-skilling or rehabilitation. He is decisively cast into outer darkness where there is weeping and gnashing of teeth. Why such a seemingly exacting and harsh action from the\nmaster for a “small” matter of non-performance at best and laziness at worst? Fact\nof the matter is that laziness is our “acceptable” demon of wickedness. In the\nthralldom of laziness and slothfulness lies the same demonic species of ungodliness\nand wickedness as verily resident in the hue of rape, murder, adultery and all\nother hideous forms of sin which are visibly deplorable and revolting. \n\n<h3> 7. God is the foundation of everything </h3>\n\nThe faithful servants referenced what the master had given them before enumerating their yield. This is crucial. Firstly,God is the foundation of everything. Secondly, God’s expectations are reasonable because they are predicated by provision. i.e. God does not demand an account over nothing. Life as a gift from God in itself. It is the foundation of everything and everyone who has breath in their nostrils can do something. The unfaithful servant did NOT make mention of the single talent given to him. The point of departure in his self-pitying response is to decimate the character of the master. He alleges: “I knew thee that thou art an hard man, reaping where thou hast not sown, and gathering where thou hast not sown.”\nWhile the unfaithful servant’s reportage takes off by decimating and vilifying\nthe character of the master, the attitude of the two faithful servants exudes\ngratitude as the appropriate point of departure. You may not have everything\nyou have wished for and desired but just take a moment to look around you and count your blessings. Perhaps you are frustrated over unfinished business and undone tasks but hey, today is another day God has granted us, a day we did not have to pay for, a fresh new chance we do not deserve. The least we can do is to seize the opportunity thankfully with both hands and gear up to deliver. A positive attitude trumps aptitude in the general ecosystem of life. \n\n<h3> 8. There is no excuse for non-performance </h3>\nThe unfaithful servant attempted to contextualize and rationalize his indolent station on the basis of the alleged crudeness of the master’s character. (Matt 25:24) The master could have easily nullified his line of reasoning by simply reminding him that the task at hand had nothing to do with the hardness of master or any the imaginary traits the servant is expostulating about, the task was to\nmultiply the talent. But the master decided to tag along his futile and evasive\nline of thinking and prove that the logical end of his own reasoning is that he\ntherefore should have invested the talent as his perception of the master’s\ncharacter gave him more reason to invest that not to. In a nutshell, the master\nis saying to the servant “your reasons for non-performance are neither here nor\nthere”.&nbsp; The same is true for all our wafer-thin excuses for non-performance. They are neither here nor there.\n<h3> 9. Dissimilar Capabilities (Talents) Equal Exponentiality  </h3>\nDid you notice that the two faithful servants had 100% yields in their entrepreneurship? What that means is that the one with five talents did not bask in the laurels. He did not sit back and gloat over his lot for he understood that the five talents were not achievement but mere\nseed. He understood principle number one highlighted above that the measure of\nsuccess and faithfulness is not safe keeping but increase (fruitfulness). The\none with two talents did not nurse any gripe over being less endowed, He\ngratefully embraced what was allotted to him and similarly hit the ground\nrunning, thus both of them achieved 100% yield. \n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The reason people tend to worship outstandingly successful\npeople is because any trail blazing persona will tower like a demi-god to a\nfull time under achiever. The more we inch to the summit in our different\nspheres the less we covet, revere and venerate genius, and in fact the more we\nbegin to appreciate the fact that genius is not a specialized or exclusive\nendowment but the basic defining operative of persistent, resilient and diligent\npurposeful living. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Knowledge and skill are neither innate nor hardwired, they\nare acquired. The ability to acquire knowledge productively is developed can be\ndeveloped by anyone, it is honed in the grind of resilience and consistency.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Let me close off with a trenchant volley from an inspired\nauthor, </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>“Many whom God has qualified to do excellent work accomplish\nvery little, because they attempt little. Thousands pass through life as if\nthey had no definite object for which to live, no standard to reach. Such will\nobtain a reward proportionate to their works. Remember that you will never\nreach a higher standard than you yourself set. . . . Press with determination\nin the right direction, and circumstances will be your helpers, not your\nhindrances.” Ellen G. White Christ Object Lessons 331, 332)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Over to you. Ever spent some time on the Parable of Talents?\nWhat stood out for you? Please share your reflections on the comments section\nbelow. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','UnSugar Coating Dead Salt: 9 Lessons from the Parable of Talents','','inherit','closed','closed','','99762-revision-v1','','','2020-02-27 23:46:49','2020-02-27 21:46:49','',99762,'https://expound.org.za/99762-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99766,1,'2020-02-27 23:42:21','2020-02-27 21:42:21','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99763} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/parable-of-talents.jpg\" alt=\"The parable of talents commentry\" class=\"wp-image-99763\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In Mathew 25: 14-30 we are given a reverting account of a wealthy master who entrusted a measure of his wealth (in form of talents) among three of his  servants before going to a far away country. Just like any parable given by Jesus, fiction looms more powerful than reality as narrative artistry gave Jesus latitude to poignantly illuminate complexes of human life that underscore His intimate proximity to the detail of human misery, wretchedness and potential under divine empowerment. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Revisit the parable: Mathew 25: 14-30 and then consider the following\neight (8) cogent lessons we can draw from the account.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<ol><li> \n<h3> The measure of faithfulness and success is not safe keeping but increase. </h3>\nThe productive servants were called good and\nfaithful. Thus, to be “good and faithful” in the eyes of God has more to do\nwith multiplication and fruitfulness that it has to do with safe keeping as\nexemplified by the third servant who merely buried the talent for safe keeping.\nGod is not pleased when we aim for the bare minimum. </li>\n<li>\n<h3> Be fruitful and multiply </h3>\nThroughout the bible God employs the farming motif the basis of which is the imperative given to human beings and all creatures: “Be fruitful and Multiply”.&nbsp;\nGen 1:28 The master declared the first two servants as good and faithful\nbecause they had achieved the very object of every created creature: to\nmultiply and to be fruitful. The imperative is hardly exclusive to\nreproduction. God expects His children to multiply in all aspects of life. In\nJohn 15: 1-2 Jesus says, “I am the true vine and my Father is the husbandman. 2\nEvery branch in me that does not bear fruit He purges it and every branch in me\nthat bears fruit He purges that it may bring forth more fruit. The object of\nthe farming and fruit bearing motifs is aptly illumined in Galatians 5: 22.\nChildren of God must bear fruit and in Galatians 5:22 the combo of the expected\nfruitage is unpacked: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance,\nkindness, goodness, faithfulness.” &nbsp;Now\nthe question to be raised is: what are fruits for? Fruits are food, and thus\nthe fruit is for nourishment of the children of God. The purpose of fruit\nbearing is nourishment.</li>\n<li>\n<h3> A talent is not an achievement </h3>\nAchievement is the outcome of a purposeful application of the “talent”. Natural\nendowments such as beauty, height, influence, eloquence, material belongings,\netc are not an achievement as it were. Achievement is the net outcome of the\nproductive and beneficial use of these talents or gifts.</li>\n<li> <h3> God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful </h3>\n\nMany fear failure and are reluctant to go forward at God’s charge. We forget that God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful. The determination of whether one has failed or has succeeded is not premised on the outcomes. When we obey we have succeeded, when we disobey we have failed. Take note that it is the parable of talents and not the parable of the talented. As we like to say, if it’s God’s will He will pay the bill, He has provision for every vision and all His biddings are his enablings. “As the will of man co-operates with the\nwill of God, it becomes omnipotent. Whatever is to be done at His command, may\nbe accomplished in His strength. All His biddings are enablings.” Ellen G.\nWhite. Christ\'s Object Lessons, 333.</li>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:list -->\n<li>\n<h3> Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness </h3>\nWhat we would habitually classify as laziness\nor mediocrity is addressed aptly by its first name. The unproductive servant is\naddressed as: “Thou wicked and slothful servant”. The master did not mince his\nwords. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness. The\nmaster employed categoric descriptors to unmask the slothful servant and to succinctly\n“un”sugar coat the dead salt of wickedness underlying his conspicuous languor.\nIf we consider the end of the story, the servant is not referred to some entrepreneurial\ndevelopment workshop or investment seminar for his up-skilling or\nrehabilitation. He is decisively cast into outer darkness where there is weeping\nand gnashing of teeth. Why such a seemingly exacting and harsh action from the\nmaster for a “small” matter of non-performance at best and laziness at worst? Fact\nof the matter is that laziness is our “acceptable” demon of wickedness. In the\nthralldom of laziness and slothfulness lies the same demonic species of ungodliness\nand wickedness as verily resident in the hue of rape, murder, adultery and all\nother hideous forms of sin which are visibly deplorable and revolting. </li>\n<li>\n<h3> God is the foundation of everything </h3>\n\nThe faithful servants referenced what the master had given them before enumerating their yield. This is crucial. Firstly,God is the foundation of everything. Secondly, God’s expectations are reasonable because they are predicated by provision. i.e. God does not demand an account over nothing. Life as a gift from God in itself. It is the foundation of everything and everyone who has breath in their nostrils can do something. The unfaithful servant did NOT make mention of the single talent given to him. The point of departure in his self-pitying response is to decimate the character of the master. He alleges: “I knew thee that thou art an hard man, reaping where thou hast not sown, and gathering where thou hast not sown.”\nWhile the unfaithful servant’s reportage takes off by decimating and vilifying\nthe character of the master, the attitude of the two faithful servants exudes\ngratitude as the appropriate point of departure. You may not have everything\nyou have wished for and desired but just take a moment to look around you and count your blessings. Perhaps you are frustrated over unfinished business and undone tasks but hey, today is another day God has granted us, a day we did not have to pay for, a fresh new chance we do not deserve. The least we can do is to seize the opportunity thankfully with both hands and gear up to deliver. A positive attitude trumps aptitude in the general ecosystem of life. </li>\n\n<li> <h3> There is no excuse for non-performance </h3>\nThe unfaithful servant attempted to contextualize and rationalize his indolent station on the basis of the alleged crudeness of the master’s character. (Matt 25:24) The master could have easily nullified his line of reasoning by simply reminding him that the task at hand had nothing to do with the hardness of master or any the imaginary traits the servant is expostulating about, the task was to\nmultiply the talent. But the master decided to tag along his futile and evasive\nline of thinking and prove that the logical end of his own reasoning is that he\ntherefore should have invested the talent as his perception of the master’s\ncharacter gave him more reason to invest that not to. In a nutshell, the master\nis saying to the servant “your reasons for non-performance are neither here nor\nthere”.&nbsp; The same is true for all our wafer-thin excuses for non-performance. They are neither here nor there.</li>\n<li> <h3> Dissimilar Capabilities (Talents) Equitable Yeild </h3>\nDid you notice that the two faithful servants had 100% yields in their entrepreneurship? What that means is that the one with five talents did not bask in the laurels. He did not sit back and gloat over his lot for he understood that the five talents were not achievement but mere\nseed. He understood principle number one highlighted above that the measure of\nsuccess and faithfulness is not safe keeping but increase (fruitfulness). The\none with two talents did not nurse any gripe over being less endowed, He\ngratefully embraced what was allotted to him and similarly hit the ground\nrunning, thus both of them achieved 100% yield. </li>\n</ul>\n<!-- /wp:list -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The reason people tend to worship outstandingly successful\npeople is because any trail blazing persona will tower like a demi-god to a\nfull time under achiever. The more we inch to the summit in our different\nspheres the less we covet, revere and venerate genius, and in fact the more we\nbegin to appreciate the fact that genius is not a specialized or exclusive\nendowment but the basic defining operative of persistent, resilient and diligent\npurposeful living. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Knowledge and skill are neither innate nor hardwired, they\nare acquired. The ability to acquire knowledge productively is developed can be\ndeveloped by anyone, it is honed in the grind of resilience and consistency.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Let me close off with a trenchant volley from an inspired\nauthor, </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>“Many whom God has qualified to do excellent work accomplish\nvery little, because they attempt little. Thousands pass through life as if\nthey had no definite object for which to live, no standard to reach. Such will\nobtain a reward proportionate to their works. Remember that you will never\nreach a higher standard than you yourself set. . . . Press with determination\nin the right direction, and circumstances will be your helpers, not your\nhindrances.” Ellen G. White Christ Object Lessons 331, 332)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Over to you. Ever spent some time on the Parable of Talents?\nWhat stood out for you? Please share your reflections on the comments section\nbelow. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','UnSugar Coating Dead Salt: 8 Lessons from the Parable of Talents','','inherit','closed','closed','','99762-revision-v1','','','2020-02-27 23:42:21','2020-02-27 21:42:21','',99762,'https://expound.org.za/99762-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99768,1,'2020-02-27 23:49:36','2020-02-27 21:49:36','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99763} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/parable-of-talents.jpg\" alt=\"The parable of talents commentry\" class=\"wp-image-99763\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In Mathew 25: 14-30 we are given a reverting account of a wealthy master who entrusted a measure of his wealth (in form of talents) among three of his  servants before going to a far away country. Just like any parable given by Jesus, fiction looms more powerful than reality as narrative artistry gave Jesus latitude to poignantly illuminate complexes of human life that underscore His intimate proximity to the detail of human misery, wretchedness and potential under divine empowerment. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Revisit the parable: Mathew 25: 14-30 and then consider the following nine (9) cogent lessons we can draw from the account.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n \n<h3> 1. The measure of faithfulness and success is not safe keeping but increase. </h3>\nThe productive servants were called good and\nfaithful. Thus, to be “good and faithful” in the eyes of God has more to do\nwith multiplication and fruitfulness that it has to do with safe keeping as\nexemplified by the third servant who merely buried the talent for safe keeping.\nGod is not pleased when we aim for the bare minimum. \n<br/>\n<h3> 2. Be fruitful and multiply </h3>\nThroughout the bible God employs the farming motif the basis of which is the imperative given to human beings and all creatures: “Be fruitful and Multiply”.&nbsp;\nGen 1:28 The master declared the first two servants as good and faithful\nbecause they had achieved the very object of every created creature: to\nmultiply and to be fruitful. The imperative is hardly exclusive to\nreproduction. God expects His children to multiply in all aspects of life. In\nJohn 15: 1-2 Jesus says, “I am the true vine and my Father is the husbandman. 2\nEvery branch in me that does not bear fruit He purges it and every branch in me\nthat bears fruit He purges that it may bring forth more fruit. The object of\nthe farming and fruit bearing motifs is aptly illumined in Galatians 5: 22.\nChildren of God must bear fruit and in Galatians 5:22 the combo of the expected\nfruitage is unpacked: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance,\nkindness, goodness, faithfulness.” &nbsp;Now\nthe question to be raised is: what are fruits for? Fruits are food, and thus\nthe fruit is for nourishment of the children of God. The purpose of fruit\nbearing is nourishment.\n<br/>\n<h3> 3. A talent is not an achievement </h3>\nAchievement is the outcome of a purposeful application of the “talent”. Natural\nendowments such as beauty, height, influence, eloquence, material belongings,\netc are not an achievement as it were. Achievement is the net outcome of the\nproductive and beneficial use of these talents or gifts.\n\n<br/>\n<h3> 4. God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful </h3>\n\nMany fear failure and are reluctant to go forward at God’s charge. We forget that God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful. The determination of whether one has failed or has succeeded is not premised on the outcomes. When we obey we have succeeded, when we disobey we have failed. Take note that it is the parable of talents and not the parable of the talented. As we like to say, if it’s God’s will He will pay the bill, He has provision for every vision and all His biddings are his enablings. “As the will of man co-operates with the\nwill of God, it becomes omnipotent. Whatever is to be done at His command, may\nbe accomplished in His strength. All His biddings are enablings.” Ellen G.\nWhite. Christ\'s Object Lessons, 333.\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<br/>\n<h3> 5. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness </h3>\nWhat we would habitually classify as laziness or mediocrity is addressed aptly by its first name. The unproductive servant is addressed as: “Thou wicked and slothful servant”. The master did not mince his words. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness. The master employed categoric descriptors to unmask the slothful servant and to succinctly “un”sugar coat the dead salt of wickedness underlying his conspicuous languor. If we consider the end of the story, the servant is not referred to some entrepreneurial development workshop or investment seminar for his up-skilling or rehabilitation. He is decisively cast into outer darkness where there is weeping and gnashing of teeth. Why such a seemingly exacting and harsh action from the\nmaster for a “small” matter of non-performance at best and laziness at worst? Fact\nof the matter is that laziness is our “acceptable” demon of wickedness. In the\nthralldom of laziness and slothfulness lies the same demonic species of ungodliness\nand wickedness as verily resident in the hue of rape, murder, adultery and all\nother hideous forms of sin which are visibly deplorable and revolting. \n\n<br/>\n<h3> 6. God is the foundation of everything </h3>\n\nThe faithful servants referenced what the master had given them before enumerating their yield. This is crucial. Firstly,God is the foundation of everything. Secondly, God’s expectations are reasonable because they are predicated by provision. i.e. God does not demand an account over nothing. Life as a gift from God in itself. It is the foundation of everything and everyone who has breath in their nostrils can do something. The unfaithful servant did NOT make mention of the single talent given to him. The point of departure in his self-pitying response is to decimate the character of the master. He alleges: “I knew thee that thou art an hard man, reaping where thou hast not sown, and gathering where thou hast not sown.”\nWhile the unfaithful servant’s reportage takes off by decimating and vilifying\nthe character of the master, the attitude of the two faithful servants exudes\ngratitude as the appropriate point of departure. You may not have everything\nyou have wished for and desired but just take a moment to look around you and count your blessings. Perhaps you are frustrated over unfinished business and undone tasks but hey, today is another day God has granted us, a day we did not have to pay for, a fresh new chance we do not deserve. The least we can do is to seize the opportunity thankfully with both hands and gear up to deliver. A positive attitude trumps aptitude in the general ecosystem of life. \n<br/>\n<h3> 7. There is no excuse for non-performance </h3>\nThe unfaithful servant attempted to contextualize and rationalize his indolent station on the basis of the alleged crudeness of the master’s character. (Matt 25:24) The master could have easily nullified his line of reasoning by simply reminding him that the task at hand had nothing to do with the hardness of master or any the imaginary traits the servant is expostulating about, the task was to\nmultiply the talent. But the master decided to tag along his futile and evasive\nline of thinking and prove that the logical end of his own reasoning is that he\ntherefore should have invested the talent as his perception of the master’s\ncharacter gave him more reason to invest that not to. In a nutshell, the master\nis saying to the servant “your reasons for non-performance are neither here nor\nthere”.&nbsp; The same is true for all our wafer-thin excuses for non-performance. They are neither here nor there.\n<br/>\n<h3> 8. Dissimilar Capabilities (Talents) Equal Exponentiality  </h3>\nDid you notice that the two faithful servants had 100% yields in their entrepreneurship? What that means is that the one with five talents did not bask in the laurels. He did not sit back and gloat over his lot for he understood that the five talents were not achievement but mere\nseed. He understood principle number one highlighted above that the measure of\nsuccess and faithfulness is not safe keeping but increase (fruitfulness). The\none with two talents did not nurse any gripe over being less endowed, He\ngratefully embraced what was allotted to him and similarly hit the ground\nrunning, thus both of them achieved 100% yield. \n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The reason people tend to worship outstandingly successful\npeople is because any trail blazing persona will tower like a demi-god to a\nfull time under achiever. The more we inch to the summit in our different\nspheres the less we covet, revere and venerate genius, and in fact the more we\nbegin to appreciate the fact that genius is not a specialized or exclusive\nendowment but the basic defining operative of persistent, resilient and diligent\npurposeful living. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Knowledge and skill are neither innate nor hardwired, they\nare acquired. The ability to acquire knowledge productively is developed can be\ndeveloped by anyone, it is honed in the grind of resilience and consistency.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Let me close off with a trenchant volley from an inspired\nauthor, </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>“Many whom God has qualified to do excellent work accomplish\nvery little, because they attempt little. Thousands pass through life as if\nthey had no definite object for which to live, no standard to reach. Such will\nobtain a reward proportionate to their works. Remember that you will never\nreach a higher standard than you yourself set. . . . Press with determination\nin the right direction, and circumstances will be your helpers, not your\nhindrances.” Ellen G. White Christ Object Lessons 331, 332)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Over to you. Ever spent some time on the Parable of Talents?\nWhat stood out for you? Please share your reflections on the comments section\nbelow. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','UnSugar Coating Dead Salt: 9 Lessons from the Parable of Talents','','inherit','closed','closed','','99762-revision-v1','','','2020-02-27 23:49:36','2020-02-27 21:49:36','',99762,'https://expound.org.za/99762-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99769,1,'2020-02-27 23:53:59','2020-02-27 21:53:59','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99763} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/parable-of-talents.jpg\" alt=\"The parable of talents commentry\" class=\"wp-image-99763\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In Mathew 25: 14-30 we are given a reverting account of a wealthy master who entrusted a measure of his wealth (in form of talents) among three of his &nbsp;servants before going to a far away country. Just like any parable given by Jesus, fiction looms more powerful than reality as narrative artistry gave Jesus latitude to poignantly illuminate complexes of human life in a manner that underscored His intimate proximity to the detail of human misery, wretchedness and potential under divine empowerment. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Revisit the parable: Matthew 25: 14-30 and then consider the following nine (9) cogent lessons we can draw from the account.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n \n<h3> 1. The measure of faithfulness and success is not safe keeping but increase. </h3>\nThe productive servants were called good and\nfaithful. Thus, to be “good and faithful” in the eyes of God has more to do\nwith multiplication and fruitfulness that it has to do with safe keeping as\nexemplified by the third servant who merely buried the talent for safe keeping.\nGod is not pleased when we aim for the bare minimum. \n<br/>\n<h3> 2. Be fruitful and multiply </h3>\nThroughout the bible God employs the farming motif the basis of which is the imperative given to human beings and all creatures: “Be fruitful and Multiply”.&nbsp;\nGen 1:28 The master declared the first two servants as good and faithful\nbecause they had achieved the very object of every created creature: to\nmultiply and to be fruitful. The imperative is hardly exclusive to\nreproduction. God expects His children to multiply in all aspects of life. In\nJohn 15: 1-2 Jesus says, “I am the true vine and my Father is the husbandman. 2\nEvery branch in me that does not bear fruit He purges it and every branch in me\nthat bears fruit He purges that it may bring forth more fruit. The object of\nthe farming and fruit bearing motifs is aptly illumined in Galatians 5: 22.\nChildren of God must bear fruit and in Galatians 5:22 the combo of the expected\nfruitage is unpacked: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance,\nkindness, goodness, faithfulness.” &nbsp;Now\nthe question to be raised is: what are fruits for? Fruits are food, and thus\nthe fruit is for nourishment of the children of God. The purpose of fruit\nbearing is nourishment.\n<br/>\n<h3> 3. A talent is not an achievement </h3>\nAchievement is the outcome of a purposeful application of the “talent”. Natural\nendowments such as beauty, height, influence, eloquence, material belongings,\netc are not an achievement as it were. Achievement is the net outcome of the\nproductive and beneficial use of these talents or gifts.\n\n<br/>\n<h3> 4. God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful </h3>\n\nMany fear failure and are reluctant to go forward at God’s charge. We forget that God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful. The determination of whether one has failed or has succeeded is not premised on the outcomes. When we obey we have succeeded, when we disobey we have failed. Take note that it is the parable of talents and not the parable of the talented. As we like to say, if it’s God’s will He will pay the bill, He has provision for every vision and all His biddings are his enablings. “As the will of man co-operates with the\nwill of God, it becomes omnipotent. Whatever is to be done at His command, may\nbe accomplished in His strength. All His biddings are enablings.” Ellen G.\nWhite. Christ\'s Object Lessons, 333.\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<br/>\n<h3> 5. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness </h3>\nWhat we would habitually classify as laziness or mediocrity is addressed aptly by its first name. The unproductive servant is addressed as: “Thou wicked and slothful servant”. The master did not mince his words. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness. The master employed categoric descriptors to unmask the slothful servant and to succinctly “un”sugar coat the dead salt of wickedness underlying his conspicuous languor. If we consider the end of the story, the servant is not referred to some entrepreneurial development workshop or investment seminar for his up-skilling or rehabilitation. He is decisively cast into outer darkness where there is weeping and gnashing of teeth. Why such a seemingly exacting and harsh action from the\nmaster for a “small” matter of non-performance at best and laziness at worst? Fact\nof the matter is that laziness is our “acceptable” demon of wickedness. In the\nthralldom of laziness and slothfulness lies the same demonic species of ungodliness\nand wickedness as verily resident in the hue of rape, murder, adultery and all\nother hideous forms of sin which are visibly deplorable and revolting. \n\n<br/>\n<h3> 6. God is the foundation of everything </h3>\n\nThe faithful servants referenced what the master had given them before enumerating their yield. This is crucial. Firstly,God is the foundation of everything. Secondly, God’s expectations are reasonable because they are predicated by provision. i.e. God does not demand an account over nothing. Life as a gift from God in itself. It is the foundation of everything and everyone who has breath in their nostrils can do something. The unfaithful servant did NOT make mention of the single talent given to him. The point of departure in his self-pitying response is to decimate the character of the master. He alleges: “I knew thee that thou art an hard man, reaping where thou hast not sown, and gathering where thou hast not sown.”\nWhile the unfaithful servant’s reportage takes off by decimating and vilifying\nthe character of the master, the attitude of the two faithful servants exudes\ngratitude as the appropriate point of departure. You may not have everything\nyou have wished for and desired but just take a moment to look around you and count your blessings. Perhaps you are frustrated over unfinished business and undone tasks but hey, today is another day God has granted us, a day we did not have to pay for, a fresh new chance we do not deserve. The least we can do is to seize the opportunity thankfully with both hands and gear up to deliver. A positive attitude trumps aptitude in the general ecosystem of life. \n<br/>\n<h3> 7. There is no excuse for non-performance </h3>\nThe unfaithful servant attempted to contextualize and rationalize his indolent station on the basis of the alleged crudeness of the master’s character. (Matt 25:24) The master could have easily nullified his line of reasoning by simply reminding him that the task at hand had nothing to do with the hardness of master or any the imaginary traits the servant is expostulating about, the task was to\nmultiply the talent. But the master decided to tag along his futile and evasive\nline of thinking and prove that the logical end of his own reasoning is that he\ntherefore should have invested the talent as his perception of the master’s\ncharacter gave him more reason to invest that not to. In a nutshell, the master\nis saying to the servant “your reasons for non-performance are neither here nor\nthere”.&nbsp; The same is true for all our wafer-thin excuses for non-performance. They are neither here nor there.\n<br/>\n<h3> 8. Dissimilar Capabilities (Talents) Equal Exponentiality  </h3>\nDid you notice that the two faithful servants had 100% yields in their entrepreneurship? What that means is that the one with five talents did not bask in the laurels. He did not sit back and gloat over his lot for he understood that the five talents were not achievement but mere\nseed. He understood principle number one highlighted above that the measure of\nsuccess and faithfulness is not safe keeping but increase (fruitfulness). The\none with two talents did not nurse any gripe over being less endowed, He\ngratefully embraced what was allotted to him and similarly hit the ground\nrunning, thus both of them achieved 100% yield. \n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The reason people tend to worship outstandingly successful\npeople is because any trail blazing persona will tower like a demi-god to a\nfull time under achiever. The more we inch to the summit in our different\nspheres the less we covet, revere and venerate genius, and in fact the more we\nbegin to appreciate the fact that genius is not a specialized or exclusive\nendowment but the basic defining operative of persistent, resilient and diligent\npurposeful living. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Knowledge and skill are neither innate nor hardwired, they\nare acquired. The ability to acquire knowledge productively is developed can be\ndeveloped by anyone, it is honed in the grind of resilience and consistency.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Let me close off with a trenchant volley from an inspired\nauthor, </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>“Many whom God has qualified to do excellent work accomplish\nvery little, because they attempt little. Thousands pass through life as if\nthey had no definite object for which to live, no standard to reach. Such will\nobtain a reward proportionate to their works. Remember that you will never\nreach a higher standard than you yourself set. . . . Press with determination\nin the right direction, and circumstances will be your helpers, not your\nhindrances.” Ellen G. White Christ Object Lessons 331, 332)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Over to you. Ever spent some time on the Parable of Talents?\nWhat stood out for you? Please share your reflections on the comments section\nbelow. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','UnSugar Coating Dead Salt: 9 Lessons from the Parable of Talents','','inherit','closed','closed','','99762-revision-v1','','','2020-02-27 23:53:59','2020-02-27 21:53:59','',99762,'https://expound.org.za/99762-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99770,1,'2020-02-27 23:54:31','2020-02-27 21:54:31','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99763} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/parable-of-talents.jpg\" alt=\"The parable of talents commentry\" class=\"wp-image-99763\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In Mathew 25: 14-30 we are given a reverting account of a wealthy master who entrusted a measure of his wealth (in form of talents) among three of his &nbsp;servants before going to a far away country. Just like any parable given by Jesus, fiction looms more powerful than reality as narrative artistry gave Jesus latitude to poignantly illuminate complexes of human life in a manner that underscored His intimate proximity to the detail of human misery, wretchedness and potential under divine empowerment. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Revisit the parable: Matthew 25: 14-30 and then consider the following eight (8) cogent lessons we can draw from the account.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n \n<h3> 1. The measure of faithfulness and success is not safe keeping but increase. </h3>\nThe productive servants were called good and\nfaithful. Thus, to be “good and faithful” in the eyes of God has more to do\nwith multiplication and fruitfulness that it has to do with safe keeping as\nexemplified by the third servant who merely buried the talent for safe keeping.\nGod is not pleased when we aim for the bare minimum. \n<br/>\n<h3> 2. Be fruitful and multiply </h3>\nThroughout the bible God employs the farming motif the basis of which is the imperative given to human beings and all creatures: “Be fruitful and Multiply”.&nbsp;\nGen 1:28 The master declared the first two servants as good and faithful\nbecause they had achieved the very object of every created creature: to\nmultiply and to be fruitful. The imperative is hardly exclusive to\nreproduction. God expects His children to multiply in all aspects of life. In\nJohn 15: 1-2 Jesus says, “I am the true vine and my Father is the husbandman. 2\nEvery branch in me that does not bear fruit He purges it and every branch in me\nthat bears fruit He purges that it may bring forth more fruit. The object of\nthe farming and fruit bearing motifs is aptly illumined in Galatians 5: 22.\nChildren of God must bear fruit and in Galatians 5:22 the combo of the expected\nfruitage is unpacked: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance,\nkindness, goodness, faithfulness.” &nbsp;Now\nthe question to be raised is: what are fruits for? Fruits are food, and thus\nthe fruit is for nourishment of the children of God. The purpose of fruit\nbearing is nourishment.\n<br/>\n<h3> 3. A talent is not an achievement </h3>\nAchievement is the outcome of a purposeful application of the “talent”. Natural\nendowments such as beauty, height, influence, eloquence, material belongings,\netc are not an achievement as it were. Achievement is the net outcome of the\nproductive and beneficial use of these talents or gifts.\n\n<br/>\n<h3> 4. God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful </h3>\n\nMany fear failure and are reluctant to go forward at God’s charge. We forget that God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful. The determination of whether one has failed or has succeeded is not premised on the outcomes. When we obey we have succeeded, when we disobey we have failed. Take note that it is the parable of talents and not the parable of the talented. As we like to say, if it’s God’s will He will pay the bill, He has provision for every vision and all His biddings are his enablings. “As the will of man co-operates with the\nwill of God, it becomes omnipotent. Whatever is to be done at His command, may\nbe accomplished in His strength. All His biddings are enablings.” Ellen G.\nWhite. Christ\'s Object Lessons, 333.\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<br/>\n<h3> 5. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness </h3>\nWhat we would habitually classify as laziness or mediocrity is addressed aptly by its first name. The unproductive servant is addressed as: “Thou wicked and slothful servant”. The master did not mince his words. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness. The master employed categoric descriptors to unmask the slothful servant and to succinctly “un”sugar coat the dead salt of wickedness underlying his conspicuous languor. If we consider the end of the story, the servant is not referred to some entrepreneurial development workshop or investment seminar for his up-skilling or rehabilitation. He is decisively cast into outer darkness where there is weeping and gnashing of teeth. Why such a seemingly exacting and harsh action from the\nmaster for a “small” matter of non-performance at best and laziness at worst? Fact\nof the matter is that laziness is our “acceptable” demon of wickedness. In the\nthralldom of laziness and slothfulness lies the same demonic species of ungodliness\nand wickedness as verily resident in the hue of rape, murder, adultery and all\nother hideous forms of sin which are visibly deplorable and revolting. \n\n<br/>\n<h3> 6. God is the foundation of everything </h3>\n\nThe faithful servants referenced what the master had given them before enumerating their yield. This is crucial. Firstly,God is the foundation of everything. Secondly, God’s expectations are reasonable because they are predicated by provision. i.e. God does not demand an account over nothing. Life as a gift from God in itself. It is the foundation of everything and everyone who has breath in their nostrils can do something. The unfaithful servant did NOT make mention of the single talent given to him. The point of departure in his self-pitying response is to decimate the character of the master. He alleges: “I knew thee that thou art an hard man, reaping where thou hast not sown, and gathering where thou hast not sown.”\nWhile the unfaithful servant’s reportage takes off by decimating and vilifying\nthe character of the master, the attitude of the two faithful servants exudes\ngratitude as the appropriate point of departure. You may not have everything\nyou have wished for and desired but just take a moment to look around you and count your blessings. Perhaps you are frustrated over unfinished business and undone tasks but hey, today is another day God has granted us, a day we did not have to pay for, a fresh new chance we do not deserve. The least we can do is to seize the opportunity thankfully with both hands and gear up to deliver. A positive attitude trumps aptitude in the general ecosystem of life. \n<br/>\n<h3> 7. There is no excuse for non-performance </h3>\nThe unfaithful servant attempted to contextualize and rationalize his indolent station on the basis of the alleged crudeness of the master’s character. (Matt 25:24) The master could have easily nullified his line of reasoning by simply reminding him that the task at hand had nothing to do with the hardness of master or any the imaginary traits the servant is expostulating about, the task was to\nmultiply the talent. But the master decided to tag along his futile and evasive\nline of thinking and prove that the logical end of his own reasoning is that he\ntherefore should have invested the talent as his perception of the master’s\ncharacter gave him more reason to invest that not to. In a nutshell, the master\nis saying to the servant “your reasons for non-performance are neither here nor\nthere”.&nbsp; The same is true for all our wafer-thin excuses for non-performance. They are neither here nor there.\n<br/>\n<h3> 8. Dissimilar Capabilities (Talents) Equal Exponentiality  </h3>\nDid you notice that the two faithful servants had 100% yields in their entrepreneurship? What that means is that the one with five talents did not bask in the laurels. He did not sit back and gloat over his lot for he understood that the five talents were not achievement but mere\nseed. He understood principle number one highlighted above that the measure of\nsuccess and faithfulness is not safe keeping but increase (fruitfulness). The\none with two talents did not nurse any gripe over being less endowed, He\ngratefully embraced what was allotted to him and similarly hit the ground\nrunning, thus both of them achieved 100% yield. \n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The reason people tend to worship outstandingly successful\npeople is because any trail blazing persona will tower like a demi-god to a\nfull time under achiever. The more we inch to the summit in our different\nspheres the less we covet, revere and venerate genius, and in fact the more we\nbegin to appreciate the fact that genius is not a specialized or exclusive\nendowment but the basic defining operative of persistent, resilient and diligent\npurposeful living. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Knowledge and skill are neither innate nor hardwired, they\nare acquired. The ability to acquire knowledge productively is developed can be\ndeveloped by anyone, it is honed in the grind of resilience and consistency.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Let me close off with a trenchant volley from an inspired\nauthor, </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>“Many whom God has qualified to do excellent work accomplish\nvery little, because they attempt little. Thousands pass through life as if\nthey had no definite object for which to live, no standard to reach. Such will\nobtain a reward proportionate to their works. Remember that you will never\nreach a higher standard than you yourself set. . . . Press with determination\nin the right direction, and circumstances will be your helpers, not your\nhindrances.” Ellen G. White Christ Object Lessons 331, 332)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Over to you. Ever spent some time on the Parable of Talents?\nWhat stood out for you? Please share your reflections on the comments section\nbelow. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','UnSugar Coating Dead Salt: 8 Lessons from the Parable of Talents','','inherit','closed','closed','','99762-revision-v1','','','2020-02-27 23:54:31','2020-02-27 21:54:31','',99762,'https://expound.org.za/99762-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99771,1,'2020-02-27 23:55:29','2020-02-27 21:55:29','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99763} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/parable-of-talents.jpg\" alt=\"The parable of talents commentry\" class=\"wp-image-99763\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In Mathew 25: 14-30 we are given a reverting account of a wealthy master who entrusted a measure of his wealth (in form of talents) among three of his &nbsp;servants before going to a far away country. Just like any parable given by Jesus, fiction looms more powerful than reality as narrative artistry gave Jesus latitude to poignantly illuminate complexes of human life in a manner that underscored His intimate proximity to the detail of human misery, wretchedness and potential under divine empowerment. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Revisit the parable: Matthew 25: 14-30 and then consider the following eight (8) cogent lessons we can draw from the account.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n \n<h3> 1. The measure of faithfulness and success is not safe keeping but increase. </h3>\nThe productive servants were called good and\nfaithful. Thus, to be “good and faithful” in the eyes of God has more to do\nwith multiplication and fruitfulness that it has to do with safe keeping as\nexemplified by the third servant who merely buried the talent for safe keeping.\nGod is not pleased when we aim for the bare minimum. \n<br/>\n<h3> 2. Be fruitful and multiply </h3>\nThroughout the bible God employs the farming motif the basis of which is the imperative given to human beings and all creatures: “Be fruitful and Multiply”.&nbsp;\nGen 1:28 The master declared the first two servants as good and faithful\nbecause they had achieved the very object of every created creature: to\nmultiply and to be fruitful. The imperative is hardly exclusive to\nreproduction. God expects His children to multiply in all aspects of life. In\nJohn 15: 1-2 Jesus says, “I am the true vine and my Father is the husbandman. 2\nEvery branch in me that does not bear fruit He purges it and every branch in me\nthat bears fruit He purges that it may bring forth more fruit. The object of\nthe farming and fruit bearing motifs is aptly illumined in Galatians 5: 22.\nChildren of God must bear fruit and in Galatians 5:22 the combo of the expected\nfruitage is unpacked: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance,\nkindness, goodness, faithfulness.” &nbsp;Now\nthe question to be raised is: what are fruits for? Fruits are food, and thus\nthe fruit is for nourishment of the children of God. The purpose of fruit\nbearing is nourishment.\n<br/>\n<h3> 3. A talent is not an achievement </h3>\nAchievement is the outcome of a purposeful application of the “talent”. Natural\nendowments such as beauty, height, influence, eloquence, material belongings,\netc are not an achievement as it were. Achievement is the net outcome of the\nproductive and beneficial use of these talents or gifts.\n\n<br/>\n<h3> 4. God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful </h3>\n\nMany fear failure and are reluctant to go forward at God’s charge. We forget that God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful. The determination of whether one has failed or has succeeded is not premised on the outcomes. When we obey we have succeeded, when we disobey we have failed. Take note that it is the parable of talents and not the parable of the talented. As we like to say, if it’s God’s will He will pay the bill, He has provision for every vision and all His biddings are his enablings. “As the will of man co-operates with the\nwill of God, it becomes omnipotent. Whatever is to be done at His command, may\nbe accomplished in His strength. All His biddings are enablings.” Ellen G.\nWhite. Christ\'s Object Lessons, 333.\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<br/>\n<h3> 5. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness </h3>\nWhat we would habitually classify as laziness or mediocrity is addressed aptly by its first name. The unproductive servant is addressed as: “Thou wicked and slothful servant”. The master did not mince his words. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness. The master employed categoric descriptors to unmask the slothful servant and to succinctly “un”sugar coat the dead salt of wickedness underlying his conspicuous languor. If we consider the end of the story, the servant is not referred to some entrepreneurial development workshop or investment seminar for his up-skilling or rehabilitation. He is decisively cast into outer darkness where there is weeping and gnashing of teeth. Why such a seemingly exacting and harsh action from the\nmaster for a “small” matter of non-performance at best and laziness at worst? Fact\nof the matter is that laziness is our “acceptable” demon of wickedness. In the\nthralldom of laziness and slothfulness lies the same demonic species of ungodliness\nand wickedness as verily resident in the hue of rape, murder, adultery and all\nother hideous forms of sin which are visibly deplorable and revolting. \n\n<br/>\n<h3> 6. God is the foundation of everything </h3>\n\nThe faithful servants referenced what the master had given them before enumerating their yield. This is crucial. Firstly,God is the foundation of everything. Secondly, God’s expectations are reasonable because they are predicated by provision. i.e. God does not demand an account over nothing. Life as a gift from God in itself. It is the foundation of everything and everyone who has breath in their nostrils can do something. The unfaithful servant did NOT make mention of the single talent given to him. The point of departure in his self-pitying response is to decimate the character of the master. He alleges: “I knew thee that thou art an hard man, reaping where thou hast not sown, and gathering where thou hast not sown.”\nWhile the unfaithful servant’s reportage takes off by decimating and vilifying\nthe character of the master, the attitude of the two faithful servants exudes\ngratitude as the appropriate point of departure. You may not have everything\nyou have wished for and desired but just take a moment to look around you and count your blessings. Perhaps you are frustrated over unfinished business and undone tasks but hey, today is another day God has granted us, a day we did not have to pay for, a fresh new chance we do not deserve. The least we can do is to seize the opportunity thankfully with both hands and gear up to deliver. A positive attitude trumps aptitude in the general ecosystem of life. \n<br/>\n<h3> 7. There is no excuse for non-performance </h3>\nThe unfaithful servant attempted to contextualize and rationalize his indolent station on the basis of the alleged crudeness of the master’s character. (Matt 25:24) The master could have easily nullified his line of reasoning by simply reminding him that the task at hand had nothing to do with the hardness of master or any the imaginary traits the servant is expostulating about, the task was to\nmultiply the talent. But the master decided to tag along his futile and evasive\nline of thinking and prove that the logical end of his own reasoning is that he\ntherefore should have invested the talent as his perception of the master’s\ncharacter gave him more reason to invest that not to. In a nutshell, the master\nis saying to the servant “your reasons for non-performance are neither here nor\nthere”.&nbsp; The same is true for all our wafer-thin excuses for non-performance. They are neither here nor there.\n<br/>\n<h3> 8. Dissimilar Capabilities (Talents) Equal Exponentiality  </h3>\nDid you notice that the two faithful servants had 100% yields in their entrepreneurship? What that means is that the one with five talents did not bask in the laurels. He did not sit back and gloat over his lot for he understood that the five talents were not achievement but mere\nseed. He understood principle number one highlighted above that the measure of\nsuccess and faithfulness is not safe keeping but increase (fruitfulness). The\none with two talents did not nurse any gripe over being less endowed, He\ngratefully embraced what was allotted to him and similarly hit the ground\nrunning, thus both of them achieved 100% yield. \n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:nextpage -->\n<!--nextpage-->\n<!-- /wp:nextpage -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The reason people tend to worship outstandingly successful\npeople is because any trail blazing persona will tower like a demi-god to a\nfull time under achiever. The more we inch to the summit in our different\nspheres the less we covet, revere and venerate genius, and in fact the more we\nbegin to appreciate the fact that genius is not a specialized or exclusive\nendowment but the basic defining operative of persistent, resilient and diligent\npurposeful living. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Knowledge and skill are neither innate nor hardwired, they\nare acquired. The ability to acquire knowledge productively is developed can be\ndeveloped by anyone, it is honed in the grind of resilience and consistency.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Let me close off with a trenchant volley from an inspired\nauthor, </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>“Many whom God has qualified to do excellent work accomplish\nvery little, because they attempt little. Thousands pass through life as if\nthey had no definite object for which to live, no standard to reach. Such will\nobtain a reward proportionate to their works. Remember that you will never\nreach a higher standard than you yourself set. . . . Press with determination\nin the right direction, and circumstances will be your helpers, not your\nhindrances.” Ellen G. White Christ Object Lessons 331, 332)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Over to you. Ever spent some time on the Parable of Talents?\nWhat stood out for you? Please share your reflections on the comments section\nbelow. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','UnSugar Coating Dead Salt: 8 Lessons from the Parable of Talents','','inherit','closed','closed','','99762-revision-v1','','','2020-02-27 23:55:29','2020-02-27 21:55:29','',99762,'https://expound.org.za/99762-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99772,1,'2020-02-27 23:56:09','2020-02-27 21:56:09','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99763} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/parable-of-talents.jpg\" alt=\"The parable of talents commentry\" class=\"wp-image-99763\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In Mathew 25: 14-30 we are given a reverting account of a wealthy master who entrusted a measure of his wealth (in form of talents) among three of his &nbsp;servants before going to a far away country. Just like any parable given by Jesus, fiction looms more powerful than reality as narrative artistry gave Jesus latitude to poignantly illuminate complexes of human life in a manner that underscored His intimate proximity to the detail of human misery, wretchedness and potential under divine empowerment. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Revisit the parable: Matthew 25: 14-30 and then consider the following eight (8) cogent lessons we can draw from the account.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n \n<h3> 1. The measure of faithfulness and success is not safe keeping but increase. </h3>\nThe productive servants were called good and\nfaithful. Thus, to be “good and faithful” in the eyes of God has more to do\nwith multiplication and fruitfulness that it has to do with safe keeping as\nexemplified by the third servant who merely buried the talent for safe keeping.\nGod is not pleased when we aim for the bare minimum. \n<br/>\n<h3> 2. Be fruitful and multiply </h3>\nThroughout the bible God employs the farming motif the basis of which is the imperative given to human beings and all creatures: “Be fruitful and Multiply”.&nbsp;\nGen 1:28 The master declared the first two servants as good and faithful\nbecause they had achieved the very object of every created creature: to\nmultiply and to be fruitful. The imperative is hardly exclusive to\nreproduction. God expects His children to multiply in all aspects of life. In\nJohn 15: 1-2 Jesus says, “I am the true vine and my Father is the husbandman. 2\nEvery branch in me that does not bear fruit He purges it and every branch in me\nthat bears fruit He purges that it may bring forth more fruit. The object of\nthe farming and fruit bearing motifs is aptly illumined in Galatians 5: 22.\nChildren of God must bear fruit and in Galatians 5:22 the combo of the expected\nfruitage is unpacked: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance,\nkindness, goodness, faithfulness.” &nbsp;Now\nthe question to be raised is: what are fruits for? Fruits are food, and thus\nthe fruit is for nourishment of the children of God. The purpose of fruit\nbearing is nourishment.\n<br/>\n<h3> 3. A talent is not an achievement </h3>\nAchievement is the outcome of a purposeful application of the “talent”. Natural\nendowments such as beauty, height, influence, eloquence, material belongings,\netc are not an achievement as it were. Achievement is the net outcome of the\nproductive and beneficial use of these talents or gifts.\n\n<br/>\n<h3> 4. God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful </h3>\n\nMany fear failure and are reluctant to go forward at God’s charge. We forget that God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful. The determination of whether one has failed or has succeeded is not premised on the outcomes. When we obey we have succeeded, when we disobey we have failed. Take note that it is the parable of talents and not the parable of the talented. As we like to say, if it’s God’s will He will pay the bill, He has provision for every vision and all His biddings are his enablings. “As the will of man co-operates with the\nwill of God, it becomes omnipotent. Whatever is to be done at His command, may\nbe accomplished in His strength. All His biddings are enablings.” Ellen G.\nWhite. Christ\'s Object Lessons, 333.\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<br/>\n<h3> 5. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness </h3>\nWhat we would habitually classify as laziness or mediocrity is addressed aptly by its first name. The unproductive servant is addressed as: “Thou wicked and slothful servant”. The master did not mince his words. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness. The master employed categoric descriptors to unmask the slothful servant and to succinctly “un”sugar coat the dead salt of wickedness underlying his conspicuous languor. If we consider the end of the story, the servant is not referred to some entrepreneurial development workshop or investment seminar for his up-skilling or rehabilitation. He is decisively cast into outer darkness where there is weeping and gnashing of teeth. Why such a seemingly exacting and harsh action from the\nmaster for a “small” matter of non-performance at best and laziness at worst? Fact\nof the matter is that laziness is our “acceptable” demon of wickedness. In the\nthralldom of laziness and slothfulness lies the same demonic species of ungodliness\nand wickedness as verily resident in the hue of rape, murder, adultery and all\nother hideous forms of sin which are visibly deplorable and revolting. \n\n<br/>\n<h3> 6. God is the foundation of everything </h3>\n\nThe faithful servants referenced what the master had given them before enumerating their yield. This is crucial. Firstly,God is the foundation of everything. Secondly, God’s expectations are reasonable because they are predicated by provision. i.e. God does not demand an account over nothing. Life as a gift from God in itself. It is the foundation of everything and everyone who has breath in their nostrils can do something. The unfaithful servant did NOT make mention of the single talent given to him. The point of departure in his self-pitying response is to decimate the character of the master. He alleges: “I knew thee that thou art an hard man, reaping where thou hast not sown, and gathering where thou hast not sown.”\nWhile the unfaithful servant’s reportage takes off by decimating and vilifying\nthe character of the master, the attitude of the two faithful servants exudes\ngratitude as the appropriate point of departure. You may not have everything\nyou have wished for and desired but just take a moment to look around you and count your blessings. Perhaps you are frustrated over unfinished business and undone tasks but hey, today is another day God has granted us, a day we did not have to pay for, a fresh new chance we do not deserve. The least we can do is to seize the opportunity thankfully with both hands and gear up to deliver. A positive attitude trumps aptitude in the general ecosystem of life. \n<br/>\n<h3> 7. There is no excuse for non-performance </h3>\nThe unfaithful servant attempted to contextualize and rationalize his indolent station on the basis of the alleged crudeness of the master’s character. (Matt 25:24) The master could have easily nullified his line of reasoning by simply reminding him that the task at hand had nothing to do with the hardness of master or any the imaginary traits the servant is expostulating about, the task was to\nmultiply the talent. But the master decided to tag along his futile and evasive\nline of thinking and prove that the logical end of his own reasoning is that he\ntherefore should have invested the talent as his perception of the master’s\ncharacter gave him more reason to invest that not to. In a nutshell, the master\nis saying to the servant “your reasons for non-performance are neither here nor\nthere”.&nbsp; The same is true for all our wafer-thin excuses for non-performance. They are neither here nor there.\n<br/>\n<h3> 8. Dissimilar Capabilities (Talents) Equal Exponentiality  </h3>\nDid you notice that the two faithful servants had 100% yields in their entrepreneurship? What that means is that the one with five talents did not bask in the laurels. He did not sit back and gloat over his lot for he understood that the five talents were not achievement but mere\nseed. He understood principle number one highlighted above that the measure of\nsuccess and faithfulness is not safe keeping but increase (fruitfulness). The\none with two talents did not nurse any gripe over being less endowed, He\ngratefully embraced what was allotted to him and similarly hit the ground\nrunning, thus both of them achieved 100% yield. \n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The reason people tend to worship outstandingly successful\npeople is because any trail blazing persona will tower like a demi-god to a\nfull time under achiever. The more we inch to the summit in our different\nspheres the less we covet, revere and venerate genius, and in fact the more we\nbegin to appreciate the fact that genius is not a specialized or exclusive\nendowment but the basic defining operative of persistent, resilient and diligent\npurposeful living. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Knowledge and skill are neither innate nor hardwired, they\nare acquired. The ability to acquire knowledge productively is developed can be\ndeveloped by anyone, it is honed in the grind of resilience and consistency.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Let me close off with a trenchant volley from an inspired\nauthor, </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>“Many whom God has qualified to do excellent work accomplish\nvery little, because they attempt little. Thousands pass through life as if\nthey had no definite object for which to live, no standard to reach. Such will\nobtain a reward proportionate to their works. Remember that you will never\nreach a higher standard than you yourself set. . . . Press with determination\nin the right direction, and circumstances will be your helpers, not your\nhindrances.” Ellen G. White Christ Object Lessons 331, 332)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Over to you. Ever spent some time on the Parable of Talents?\nWhat stood out for you? Please share your reflections on the comments section\nbelow. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','UnSugar Coating Dead Salt: 8 Lessons from the Parable of Talents','','inherit','closed','closed','','99762-revision-v1','','','2020-02-27 23:56:09','2020-02-27 21:56:09','',99762,'https://expound.org.za/99762-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99773,1,'2020-02-27 23:57:52','2020-02-27 21:57:52','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99763} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/parable-of-talents.jpg\" alt=\"The parable of talents commentry\" class=\"wp-image-99763\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In Mathew 25: 14-30 we are given a reverting account of a wealthy master who entrusted a measure of his wealth (in form of talents) among three of his &nbsp;servants before going to a far away country. Just like any parable given by Jesus, fiction looms more powerful than reality as narrative artistry gave Jesus latitude to poignantly illuminate complexes of human life in a manner that underscored His intimate proximity to the detail of human misery, wretchedness and potential under divine empowerment. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Revisit the parable: Matthew 25: 14-30 and then consider the following eight (8) cogent lessons we can draw from the account.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n \n<h3> 1. The measure of faithfulness and success is not safe keeping but increase. </h3>\nThe productive servants were called good and\nfaithful. Thus, to be “good and faithful” in the eyes of God has more to do\nwith multiplication and fruitfulness that it has to do with safe keeping as\nexemplified by the third servant who merely buried the talent for safe keeping.\nGod is not pleased when we aim for the bare minimum. \n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 2. Be fruitful and multiply </h3>\nThroughout the bible God employs the farming motif the basis of which is the imperative given to human beings and all creatures: “Be fruitful and Multiply”.&nbsp;\nGen 1:28 The master declared the first two servants as good and faithful\nbecause they had achieved the very object of every created creature: to\nmultiply and to be fruitful. The imperative is hardly exclusive to\nreproduction. God expects His children to multiply in all aspects of life. In\nJohn 15: 1-2 Jesus says, “I am the true vine and my Father is the husbandman. 2\nEvery branch in me that does not bear fruit He purges it and every branch in me\nthat bears fruit He purges that it may bring forth more fruit. The object of\nthe farming and fruit bearing motifs is aptly illumined in Galatians 5: 22.\nChildren of God must bear fruit and in Galatians 5:22 the combo of the expected\nfruitage is unpacked: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance,\nkindness, goodness, faithfulness.” &nbsp;Now\nthe question to be raised is: what are fruits for? Fruits are food, and thus\nthe fruit is for nourishment of the children of God. The purpose of fruit\nbearing is nourishment.\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 3. A talent is not an achievement </h3>\nAchievement is the outcome of a purposeful application of the “talent”. Natural\nendowments such as beauty, height, influence, eloquence, material belongings,\netc are not an achievement as it were. Achievement is the net outcome of the\nproductive and beneficial use of these talents or gifts.\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 4. God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful </h3>\n\nMany fear failure and are reluctant to go forward at God’s charge. We forget that God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful. The determination of whether one has failed or has succeeded is not premised on the outcomes. When we obey we have succeeded, when we disobey we have failed. Take note that it is the parable of talents and not the parable of the talented. As we like to say, if it’s God’s will He will pay the bill, He has provision for every vision and all His biddings are his enablings. “As the will of man co-operates with the\nwill of God, it becomes omnipotent. Whatever is to be done at His command, may\nbe accomplished in His strength. All His biddings are enablings.” Ellen G.\nWhite. Christ\'s Object Lessons, 333.\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 5. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness </h3>\nWhat we would habitually classify as laziness or mediocrity is addressed aptly by its first name. The unproductive servant is addressed as: “Thou wicked and slothful servant”. The master did not mince his words. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness. The master employed categoric descriptors to unmask the slothful servant and to succinctly “un”sugar coat the dead salt of wickedness underlying his conspicuous languor. If we consider the end of the story, the servant is not referred to some entrepreneurial development workshop or investment seminar for his up-skilling or rehabilitation. He is decisively cast into outer darkness where there is weeping and gnashing of teeth. Why such a seemingly exacting and harsh action from the\nmaster for a “small” matter of non-performance at best and laziness at worst? Fact\nof the matter is that laziness is our “acceptable” demon of wickedness. In the\nthralldom of laziness and slothfulness lies the same demonic species of ungodliness\nand wickedness as verily resident in the hue of rape, murder, adultery and all\nother hideous forms of sin which are visibly deplorable and revolting. \n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 6. God is the foundation of everything </h3>\n\nThe faithful servants referenced what the master had given them before enumerating their yield. This is crucial. Firstly,God is the foundation of everything. Secondly, God’s expectations are reasonable because they are predicated by provision. i.e. God does not demand an account over nothing. Life as a gift from God in itself. It is the foundation of everything and everyone who has breath in their nostrils can do something. The unfaithful servant did NOT make mention of the single talent given to him. The point of departure in his self-pitying response is to decimate the character of the master. He alleges: “I knew thee that thou art an hard man, reaping where thou hast not sown, and gathering where thou hast not sown.”\nWhile the unfaithful servant’s reportage takes off by decimating and vilifying\nthe character of the master, the attitude of the two faithful servants exudes\ngratitude as the appropriate point of departure. You may not have everything\nyou have wished for and desired but just take a moment to look around you and count your blessings. Perhaps you are frustrated over unfinished business and undone tasks but hey, today is another day God has granted us, a day we did not have to pay for, a fresh new chance we do not deserve. The least we can do is to seize the opportunity thankfully with both hands and gear up to deliver. A positive attitude trumps aptitude in the general ecosystem of life. \n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 7. There is no excuse for non-performance </h3>\nThe unfaithful servant attempted to contextualize and rationalize his indolent station on the basis of the alleged crudeness of the master’s character. (Matt 25:24) The master could have easily nullified his line of reasoning by simply reminding him that the task at hand had nothing to do with the hardness of master or any the imaginary traits the servant is expostulating about, the task was to\nmultiply the talent. But the master decided to tag along his futile and evasive\nline of thinking and prove that the logical end of his own reasoning is that he\ntherefore should have invested the talent as his perception of the master’s\ncharacter gave him more reason to invest that not to. In a nutshell, the master\nis saying to the servant “your reasons for non-performance are neither here nor\nthere”.&nbsp; The same is true for all our wafer-thin excuses for non-performance. They are neither here nor there.\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 8. Dissimilar Capabilities (Talents) Equal Exponentiality  </h3>\nDid you notice that the two faithful servants had 100% yields in their entrepreneurship? What that means is that the one with five talents did not bask in the laurels. He did not sit back and gloat over his lot for he understood that the five talents were not achievement but mere\nseed. He understood principle number one highlighted above that the measure of\nsuccess and faithfulness is not safe keeping but increase (fruitfulness). The\none with two talents did not nurse any gripe over being less endowed, He\ngratefully embraced what was allotted to him and similarly hit the ground\nrunning, thus both of them achieved 100% yield. \n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The reason people tend to worship outstandingly successful\npeople is because any trail blazing persona will tower like a demi-god to a\nfull time under achiever. The more we inch to the summit in our different\nspheres the less we covet, revere and venerate genius, and in fact the more we\nbegin to appreciate the fact that genius is not a specialized or exclusive\nendowment but the basic defining operative of persistent, resilient and diligent\npurposeful living. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Knowledge and skill are neither innate nor hardwired, they\nare acquired. The ability to acquire knowledge productively is developed can be\ndeveloped by anyone, it is honed in the grind of resilience and consistency.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Let me close off with a trenchant volley from an inspired\nauthor, </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>“Many whom God has qualified to do excellent work accomplish\nvery little, because they attempt little. Thousands pass through life as if\nthey had no definite object for which to live, no standard to reach. Such will\nobtain a reward proportionate to their works. Remember that you will never\nreach a higher standard than you yourself set. . . . Press with determination\nin the right direction, and circumstances will be your helpers, not your\nhindrances.” Ellen G. White Christ Object Lessons 331, 332)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Over to you. Ever spent some time on the Parable of Talents?\nWhat stood out for you? Please share your reflections on the comments section\nbelow. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','UnSugar Coating Dead Salt: 8 Lessons from the Parable of Talents','','inherit','closed','closed','','99762-revision-v1','','','2020-02-27 23:57:52','2020-02-27 21:57:52','',99762,'https://expound.org.za/99762-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99774,1,'2020-02-28 00:11:38','2020-02-27 22:11:38','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99763} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/parable-of-talents.jpg\" alt=\"The parable of talents commentry\" class=\"wp-image-99763\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In Mathew 25: 14-30 we are given a reverting account of a wealthy master who entrusted a measure of his wealth (in form of talents) among three of his &nbsp;servants before going to a far away country. Just like any parable given by Jesus, fiction looms more powerful than reality as narrative artistry gave Jesus latitude to poignantly illuminate complexes of human life in a manner that underscored His intimate proximity to the detail of human misery, wretchedness and potential under divine empowerment. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Revisit the parable: Matthew 25: 14-30 and then consider the following eight (8) cogent lessons we can draw from the account.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n \n<h3> 1. The measure of faithfulness and success is not safe keeping but increase. </h3>\nThe productive servants were called good and\nfaithful. Thus, to be “good and faithful” in the eyes of God has more to do\nwith multiplication and fruitfulness that it has to do with safe keeping as\nexemplified by the third servant who merely buried the talent for safe keeping.\nGod is not pleased when we aim for the bare minimum. \n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 2. Be fruitful and multiply </h3>\nThroughout the bible God employs the farming motif the basis of which is the imperative given to human beings and all creatures: “Be fruitful and Multiply”.&nbsp;\nGen 1:28 The master declared the first two servants as good and faithful\nbecause they had achieved the very object of every created creature: to\nmultiply and to be fruitful. The imperative is hardly exclusive to\nreproduction. God expects His children to multiply in all aspects of life. In\nJohn 15: 1-2 Jesus says, “I am the true vine and my Father is the husbandman. 2\nEvery branch in me that does not bear fruit He purges it and every branch in me\nthat bears fruit He purges that it may bring forth more fruit. The object of\nthe farming and fruit bearing motifs is aptly illumined in Galatians 5: 22.\nChildren of God must bear fruit and in Galatians 5:22 the combo of the expected\nfruitage is unpacked: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance,\nkindness, goodness, faithfulness.” &nbsp;Now\nthe question to be raised is: what are fruits for? Fruits are food, and thus\nthe fruit is for nourishment of the children of God. The purpose of fruit\nbearing is nourishment.\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 3. A talent is not an achievement </h3>\nAchievement is the outcome of a purposeful application of the “talent”. Natural\nendowments such as beauty, height, influence, eloquence, material belongings,\netc are not an achievement as it were. Achievement is the net outcome of the\nproductive and beneficial use of these talents or gifts.\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 4. God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful </h3>\n\nMany fear failure and are reluctant to go forward at God’s charge. We forget that God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful. The determination of whether one has failed or has succeeded is not premised on the outcomes. When we obey we have succeeded, when we disobey we have failed. Take note that it is the parable of talents and not the parable of the talented. As we like to say, if it’s God’s will He will pay the bill, He has provision for every vision and all His biddings are his enablings. “As the will of man co-operates with the\nwill of God, it becomes omnipotent. Whatever is to be done at His command, may\nbe accomplished in His strength. All His biddings are enablings.” Ellen G.\nWhite. Christ\'s Object Lessons, 333.\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 5. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness </h3>\nWhat we would habitually classify as laziness or mediocrity is addressed aptly by its first name. The unproductive servant is addressed as: “Thou wicked and slothful servant”. The master did not mince his words. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness. The master employed categoric descriptors to unmask the slothful servant and to succinctly “un”sugar coat the dead salt of wickedness underlying his conspicuous languor. If we consider the end of the story, the servant is not referred to some entrepreneurial development workshop or investment seminar for his up-skilling or rehabilitation. He is decisively cast into outer darkness where there is weeping and gnashing of teeth. Why such a seemingly exacting and harsh action from the\nmaster for a “small” matter of non-performance at best and laziness at worst? Fact\nof the matter is that laziness is our “acceptable” demon of wickedness. In the\nthralldom of laziness and slothfulness lies the same demonic species of ungodliness\nand wickedness as verily resident in the hue of rape, murder, adultery and all\nother hideous forms of sin which are visibly deplorable and revolting. \n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 6. God is the foundation of everything </h3>\n\nThe faithful servants referenced what the master had given them before enumerating their yield. This is crucial. Firstly,God is the foundation of everything. Secondly, God’s expectations are reasonable because they are predicated by provision. i.e. God does not demand an account over nothing. Life as a gift from God in itself. It is the foundation of everything and everyone who has breath in their nostrils can do something. The unfaithful servant did NOT make mention of the single talent given to him. The point of departure in his self-pitying response is to decimate the character of the master. He alleges: “I knew thee that thou art an hard man, reaping where thou hast not sown, and gathering where thou hast not sown.”\nWhile the unfaithful servant’s reportage takes off by decimating and vilifying\nthe character of the master, the attitude of the two faithful servants exudes\ngratitude as the appropriate point of departure. You may not have everything\nyou have wished for and desired but just take a moment to look around you and count your blessings. Perhaps you are frustrated over unfinished business and undone tasks but hey, today is another day God has granted us, a day we did not have to pay for, a fresh new chance we do not deserve. The least we can do is to seize the opportunity thankfully with both hands and gear up to deliver. A positive attitude trumps aptitude in the general ecosystem of life. \n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 7. There is no excuse for non-performance </h3>\nThe unfaithful servant attempted to contextualize and rationalize his indolent station on the basis of the alleged crudeness of the master’s character. (Matt 25:24) The master could have easily nullified his line of reasoning by simply reminding him that the task at hand had nothing to do with the hardness of master or any the imaginary traits the servant is expostulating about, the task was to\nmultiply the talent. But the master decided to tag along his futile and evasive\nline of thinking and prove that the logical end of his own reasoning is that he\ntherefore should have invested the talent as his perception of the master’s\ncharacter gave him more reason to invest that not to. In a nutshell, the master\nis saying to the servant “your reasons for non-performance are neither here nor\nthere”.&nbsp; The same is true for all our wafer-thin excuses for non-performance. They are neither here nor there.\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 8. Dissimilar Capabilities (Talents) Equal Exponentiality  </h3>\nDid you notice that the two faithful servants had 100% yields in their entrepreneurship? What that means is that the one with five talents did not bask in the laurels. He did not sit back and gloat over his lot for he understood that the five talents were not achievement but mere\nseed. He understood principle number one highlighted above that the measure of\nsuccess and faithfulness is not safe keeping but increase (fruitfulness). The\none with two talents did not nurse any gripe over being less endowed, He\ngratefully embraced what was allotted to him and similarly hit the ground\nrunning, thus both of them achieved 100% yield. \n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The reason people tend to worship outstandingly successful\npeople is because any trail blazing persona will tower like a demi-god to a\nfull time under achiever. The more we inch to the summit in our different\nspheres the less we covet, revere and venerate genius, and in fact the more we\nbegin to appreciate the fact that genius is not a specialized or exclusive\nendowment but the basic defining operative of persistent, resilient and diligent\npurposeful living. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Knowledge and skill are neither innate nor hardwired, they are acquired. The ability to acquire knowledge productively is developed and can be developed by anyone, it is honed in the grind of resilience and consistency.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Let me close off with a trenchant volley from an inspired\nauthor, </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>“Many whom God has qualified to do excellent work accomplish\nvery little, because they attempt little. Thousands pass through life as if\nthey had no definite object for which to live, no standard to reach. Such will\nobtain a reward proportionate to their works. Remember that you will never\nreach a higher standard than you yourself set. . . . Press with determination\nin the right direction, and circumstances will be your helpers, not your\nhindrances.” Ellen G. White Christ Object Lessons 331, 332)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Over to you. Ever spent some time on the Parable of Talents?\nWhat stood out for you? Please share your reflections on the comments section\nbelow. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','UnSugar Coating Dead Salt: 8 Lessons from the Parable of Talents','','inherit','closed','closed','','99762-revision-v1','','','2020-02-28 00:11:38','2020-02-27 22:11:38','',99762,'https://expound.org.za/99762-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99775,1,'2020-02-28 07:41:29','2020-02-28 05:41:29','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99763} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/parable-of-talents.jpg\" alt=\"The parable of talents commentry\" class=\"wp-image-99763\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In Matthew 25: 14-30 we are given a reverting account of a wealthy master who entrusted a measure of his wealth (in form of talents) among three of his &nbsp;servants before going to a far away country. Just like any parable given by Jesus, fiction looms more powerful than reality as narrative artistry gave Jesus latitude to poignantly illuminate complexes of human life in a manner that underscored His intimate proximity to the detail of human misery, wretchedness and potential under divine empowerment. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Revisit the parable: Matthew 25: 14-30 and then consider the following eight (8) cogent lessons we can draw from the account.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n \n<h3> 1. The measure of faithfulness and success is not safe keeping but increase. </h3>\nThe productive servants were called good and\nfaithful. Thus, to be “good and faithful” in the eyes of God has more to do\nwith multiplication and fruitfulness that it has to do with safe keeping as\nexemplified by the third servant who merely buried the talent for safe keeping.\nGod is not pleased when we aim for the bare minimum. \n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 2. Be fruitful and multiply </h3>\nThroughout the bible God employs the farming motif the basis of which is the imperative given to human beings and all creatures: “Be fruitful and Multiply”.&nbsp;\nGen 1:28 The master declared the first two servants as good and faithful\nbecause they had achieved the very object of every created creature: to\nmultiply and to be fruitful. The imperative is hardly exclusive to\nreproduction. God expects His children to multiply in all aspects of life. In\nJohn 15: 1-2 Jesus says, “I am the true vine and my Father is the husbandman. 2\nEvery branch in me that does not bear fruit He purges it and every branch in me\nthat bears fruit He purges that it may bring forth more fruit. The object of\nthe farming and fruit bearing motifs is aptly illumined in Galatians 5: 22.\nChildren of God must bear fruit and in Galatians 5:22 the combo of the expected\nfruitage is unpacked: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance,\nkindness, goodness, faithfulness.” &nbsp;Now\nthe question to be raised is: what are fruits for? Fruits are food, and thus\nthe fruit is for nourishment of the children of God. The purpose of fruit\nbearing is nourishment.\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 3. A talent is not an achievement </h3>\nAchievement is the outcome of a purposeful application of the “talent”. Natural\nendowments such as beauty, height, influence, eloquence, material belongings,\netc are not an achievement as it were. Achievement is the net outcome of the\nproductive and beneficial use of these talents or gifts.\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 4. God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful </h3>\n\nMany fear failure and are reluctant to go forward at God’s charge. We forget that God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful. The determination of whether one has failed or has succeeded is not premised on the outcomes. When we obey we have succeeded, when we disobey we have failed. Take note that it is the parable of talents and not the parable of the talented. As we like to say, if it’s God’s will He will pay the bill, He has provision for every vision and all His biddings are his enablings. “As the will of man co-operates with the\nwill of God, it becomes omnipotent. Whatever is to be done at His command, may\nbe accomplished in His strength. All His biddings are enablings.” Ellen G.\nWhite. Christ\'s Object Lessons, 333.\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 5. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness </h3>\nWhat we would habitually classify as laziness or mediocrity is addressed aptly by its first name. The unproductive servant is addressed as: “Thou wicked and slothful servant”. The master did not mince his words. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness. The master employed categoric descriptors to unmask the slothful servant and to succinctly “un”sugar coat the dead salt of wickedness underlying his conspicuous languor. If we consider the end of the story, the servant is not referred to some entrepreneurial development workshop or investment seminar for his up-skilling or rehabilitation. He is decisively cast into outer darkness where there is weeping and gnashing of teeth. Why such a seemingly exacting and harsh action from the\nmaster for a “small” matter of non-performance at best and laziness at worst? Fact\nof the matter is that laziness is our “acceptable” demon of wickedness. In the\nthralldom of laziness and slothfulness lies the same demonic species of ungodliness\nand wickedness as verily resident in the hue of rape, murder, adultery and all\nother hideous forms of sin which are visibly deplorable and revolting. \n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 6. God is the foundation of everything </h3>\n\nThe faithful servants referenced what the master had given them before enumerating their yield. This is crucial. Firstly,God is the foundation of everything. Secondly, God’s expectations are reasonable because they are predicated by provision. i.e. God does not demand an account over nothing. Life as a gift from God in itself. It is the foundation of everything and everyone who has breath in their nostrils can do something. The unfaithful servant did NOT make mention of the single talent given to him. The point of departure in his self-pitying response is to decimate the character of the master. He alleges: “I knew thee that thou art an hard man, reaping where thou hast not sown, and gathering where thou hast not sown.”\nWhile the unfaithful servant’s reportage takes off by decimating and vilifying\nthe character of the master, the attitude of the two faithful servants exudes\ngratitude as the appropriate point of departure. You may not have everything\nyou have wished for and desired but just take a moment to look around you and count your blessings. Perhaps you are frustrated over unfinished business and undone tasks but hey, today is another day God has granted us, a day we did not have to pay for, a fresh new chance we do not deserve. The least we can do is to seize the opportunity thankfully with both hands and gear up to deliver. A positive attitude trumps aptitude in the general ecosystem of life. \n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 7. There is no excuse for non-performance </h3>\nThe unfaithful servant attempted to contextualize and rationalize his indolent station on the basis of the alleged crudeness of the master’s character. (Matt 25:24) The master could have easily nullified his line of reasoning by simply reminding him that the task at hand had nothing to do with the hardness of master or any the imaginary traits the servant is expostulating about, the task was to\nmultiply the talent. But the master decided to tag along his futile and evasive\nline of thinking and prove that the logical end of his own reasoning is that he\ntherefore should have invested the talent as his perception of the master’s\ncharacter gave him more reason to invest that not to. In a nutshell, the master\nis saying to the servant “your reasons for non-performance are neither here nor\nthere”.&nbsp; The same is true for all our wafer-thin excuses for non-performance. They are neither here nor there.\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 8. Dissimilar Capabilities (Talents) Equal Exponentiality  </h3>\nDid you notice that the two faithful servants had 100% yields in their entrepreneurship? What that means is that the one with five talents did not bask in the laurels. He did not sit back and gloat over his lot for he understood that the five talents were not achievement but mere\nseed. He understood principle number one highlighted above that the measure of\nsuccess and faithfulness is not safe keeping but increase (fruitfulness). The\none with two talents did not nurse any gripe over being less endowed, He\ngratefully embraced what was allotted to him and similarly hit the ground\nrunning, thus both of them achieved 100% yield. \n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The reason people tend to worship outstandingly successful\npeople is because any trail blazing persona will tower like a demi-god to a\nfull time under achiever. The more we inch to the summit in our different\nspheres the less we covet, revere and venerate genius, and in fact the more we\nbegin to appreciate the fact that genius is not a specialized or exclusive\nendowment but the basic defining operative of persistent, resilient and diligent\npurposeful living. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Knowledge and skill are neither innate nor hardwired, they are acquired. The ability to acquire knowledge productively is developed and can be developed by anyone, it is honed in the grind of resilience and consistency.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Let me close off with a trenchant volley from an inspired\nauthor, </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>“Many whom God has qualified to do excellent work accomplish\nvery little, because they attempt little. Thousands pass through life as if\nthey had no definite object for which to live, no standard to reach. Such will\nobtain a reward proportionate to their works. Remember that you will never\nreach a higher standard than you yourself set. . . . Press with determination\nin the right direction, and circumstances will be your helpers, not your\nhindrances.” Ellen G. White Christ Object Lessons 331, 332)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Over to you. Ever spent some time on the Parable of Talents?\nWhat stood out for you? Please share your reflections on the comments section\nbelow. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','UnSugar Coating Dead Salt: 8 Lessons from the Parable of Talents','','inherit','closed','closed','','99762-revision-v1','','','2020-02-28 07:41:29','2020-02-28 05:41:29','',99762,'https://expound.org.za/99762-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99776,1,'2020-02-28 07:51:33','2020-02-28 05:51:33','<!-- wp:html -->\n[signinlocker id=\"99519\"] Locked Post Content \n\n[/signinlocker]\n<!-- /wp:html -->','Sign Locker Configs','','private','open','open','','sign-locker-configs','','','2020-02-28 09:33:37','2020-02-28 07:33:37','',0,'https://expound.org.za/?p=99776',0,'post','',0),(100156,1,'2020-07-28 07:50:52','2020-07-28 05:50:52','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":100151} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/3-wise-men-1024x950.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-100151\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The circumstances around the birth of Jesus bring to the\nfore profound insights about the Christian journey. The story unfolds as common\nplace if we have gotten too familiar with the narrative sometimes to the extent\nof missing new insights God wants to reveal to us. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In comparison with the focus of other new testament writers,\nMatthew\'s primary concern was to show and prove to the Jews that indeed Jesus\nwas their own according to the promises of the old testament.&nbsp;&nbsp; </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Have a look at the following verses:</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:quote -->\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote\"><p>“The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and will call him Immanuel” (Isaiah 7:14).</p></blockquote>\n<!-- /wp:quote -->\n\n<!-- wp:quote -->\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote\"><p>“But you, Bethlehem Ephrathah, though you are small among the clans of Judah, out of you will come for me one who will be ruler over Israel, whose origins are from of old, from ancient times” (Micah 5:2). </p></blockquote>\n<!-- /wp:quote -->\n\n<!-- wp:quote -->\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote\"><p>‘The days are coming,’ declares the Lord, ‘when I will raise up for David a righteous Branch’ ” (Jeremiah 23:5).</p></blockquote>\n<!-- /wp:quote -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Matthew\'s burden was to persuade Jews that Jesus was the\npromised Messiah every Jew was expecting notwithstanding the fact that He did\nnot set up an earthly kingdom. We see this clearly in the manner in which unlike\nJohn who traces the genealogy of Jesus all the way back to Adam to prove the universality\nof Christ and the gospel, Matthew traces the genealogy of Jesus up to Abraham\nto exalt the Hebrew-Jewish context. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Matthew 2 1-2</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:quote -->\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote\"><p>\"Now when Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea in the days of Herod the King, behold, there came wise men from the east to Jerusalem, Saying, \'Where is He that is born King of the Jews? We have seen His star in the east, and are come to worship Him.\'\"</p></blockquote>\n<!-- /wp:quote -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Matthew\'s interest in the specific inquiry of the wise men about \"..the king of the Jews..\" cannot be missed. What is striking is that the host nation of the Messiah incarnate missed the boat as it had settled in a dead and formalized gospel that would cost them nothing. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3><strong>How much has Christianity Cost You? </strong></h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Lastly, let\'s look at the sacrifice of the Wise men. Their sojourn\nis presented summarily within a verse or two and the extents of their\nsacrifices could be easily taken for granted. But these men came from the east,\nimplying a country of significant remoteness to Jerusalem. They would have had\nto endure taxing demands of a months-long journey. The journey ran into months and\nthey had to travel at night to follow the star. Most importantly, they did not\ncome empty handed. The gifts they offered for Jesus were of so much value that\nthey would suffice to sustain the family in their refugee status in Egypt. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Looking at the sacrifices of these wise men I cannot help\nbut pose these questions to myself and you… What has Christianity cost us? What\nload have we given up since we became &nbsp;Christian? What load have we taken up? How\nlong has been our journey of self-denial? </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>How far are prepared to walk this journey? Are we satisfied with the outcomes of the &nbsp;cost benefit analysis for this enterprise? &nbsp;What have we sacrificed For Christ? Has Christianity cost us not just our free time but any of our precious time? What are we willing to put in with our abstract and concrete resources? Are our priorities still the same, are the streams of our conversations still the same? How much has Christianity cost us? Yes the yoke is easy but it is still a yolk. Yes the burden is light, but it is still a burden. How much has Christianity cost us? </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Remember this, if it costs you nothing, it\'s worth nothing. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:core-embed/wordpress {\"url\":\"https://expound.org.za/when-i-grow-up-i-want-to-die/\",\"type\":\"wp-embed\",\"providerNameSlug\":\"expound\",\"className\":\"\"} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-embed-wordpress wp-block-embed is-type-wp-embed is-provider-expound\"><div class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\nhttps://expound.org.za/when-i-grow-up-i-want-to-die/\n</div></figure>\n<!-- /wp:core-embed/wordpress -->','If it Cost You Nothing, It\'s Worth Nothing','','inherit','closed','closed','','100148-revision-v1','','','2020-07-28 07:50:52','2020-07-28 05:50:52','',100148,'https://expound.org.za/100148-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(100152,1,'2020-07-25 20:43:05','2020-07-25 18:43:05','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":100151} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/3-wise-men-1024x950.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-100151\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The circumstances around the birth of Jesus bring to the\nfore profound insights about the Christian journey. The story unfolds as common\nplace if we have gotten too familiar with the narrative sometimes to the extent\nof missing new insights God wants to reveal to us. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In comparison with the focus of other new testament writers,\nMatthew\'s primary concern was to show and prove to the Jews that indeed Jesus\nwas their own according to the promises of the old testament.&nbsp;&nbsp; </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Have a look at the following verses:</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:quote -->\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote\"><p>“The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and will call him Immanuel” (Isaiah 7:14).</p></blockquote>\n<!-- /wp:quote -->\n\n<!-- wp:quote -->\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote\"><p>“But you, Bethlehem Ephrathah, though you are small among the clans of Judah, out of you will come for me one who will be ruler over Israel, whose origins are from of old, from ancient times” (Micah 5:2). </p></blockquote>\n<!-- /wp:quote -->\n\n<!-- wp:quote -->\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote\"><p>‘The days are coming,’ declares the Lord, ‘when I will raise up for David a righteous Branch’ ” (Jeremiah 23:5).</p></blockquote>\n<!-- /wp:quote -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Matthew\'s burden was to persuade Jews that Jesus was the\npromised Messiah every Jew was expecting notwithstanding the fact that He did\nnot set up an earthly kingdom. We see this clearly in the manner in which unlike\nJohn who traces the genealogy of Jesus all the way back to Adam to prove the universality\nof Christ and the gospel, Matthew traces the genealogy of Jesus up to Abraham\nto exalt the Hebrew-Jewish context. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Matthew 2 1-2</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:quote -->\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote\"><p>\"Now when Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea in the days of Herod the King, behold, there came wise men from the east to Jerusalem, Saying, \'Where is He that is born King of the Jews? We have seen His star in the east, and are come to worship Him.\'\"</p></blockquote>\n<!-- /wp:quote -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Matthew\'s interest in the specific inquiry of the wise men\nabout \"..the king of the Jews..\" cannot be missed. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3><strong>Faith is Substance </strong></h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are many fascinating take-aways form this story but\nwhat stick out for me are &nbsp;these three remarkable\nlevels of the radical faith of the wise men. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>1. Being non Jewish, the wise men believed and maintained\nkeen interest in the Promise of the Messiah they had never seen let alone\nknown. &nbsp;</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>2. The wise men believed in the promise against the unbelief\nof the religious leaders in the chosen Jewish nation. The obliviousness of the\nscribes did not cause them to doubt their convictions. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>3. The wise men believed in the universal kingship of baby\nJesus when they saw Him in His mother’s arms.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Friends, it is easy to believe a Jesus who sits on the throne\nand reigns in glory. But it takes radical optimism to believe in a little\nhelpless infant clutching at the mother\'s grip as the creator &nbsp;and King of the Universe. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It takes no effort at all to believe Christ reigns when He\nworks great miracles and answers our prayers. But it takes extra ordinary,\nradical optimism to believe in His Kingship and Lordship when He is seemingly\nsilent and invisible in darkest valleys. It is easy to burst in song when He\nhas done great things. But true Faith is to keep a song in your heart when all\nlooks grim and gloomy. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3><strong>How much has Christianity Cost You? </strong></h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Lastly, let\'s look at the sacrifice of the Wise men. Their sojourn\nis presented summarily within a verse or two and the extents of their\nsacrifices could be easily taken for granted. But these men came from the east,\nimplying a country of significant remoteness to Jerusalem. They would have had\nto endure taxing demands of a months-long journey. The journey ran into months and\nthey had to travel at night to follow the star. Most importantly, they did not\ncome empty handed. The gifts they offered for Jesus were of so much value that\nthey would suffice to sustain the family in their refugee status in Egypt. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Looking at the sacrifices of these wise men I cannot help\nbut pose these questions to myself and you… What has Christianity cost us? What\nload have we given up since we became &nbsp;Christian? What load have we taken up? How\nlong has been our journey of self-denial? </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>How far are prepared to walk this journey? Are we satisfied with the outcomes of the  cost benefit analysis for this enterprise?  What have we sacrificed For Christ? Has Christianity cost us not just our free time but any of our precious time? What are we willing to put in with our abstract and concrete resources? Are our priorities still the same, are the streams of our conversations still the same? How much has Christianity cost us? Yes the yoke is easy but it is still a yolk. Yes the burden is light, but it is still a burden. How much has Christianity cost us? </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Remember this, if it costs you nothing it is worth nothing. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:core-embed/wordpress {\"url\":\"https://expound.org.za/when-i-grow-up-i-want-to-die/\",\"type\":\"wp-embed\",\"providerNameSlug\":\"expound\",\"className\":\"\"} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-embed-wordpress wp-block-embed is-type-wp-embed is-provider-expound\"><div class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\nhttps://expound.org.za/when-i-grow-up-i-want-to-die/\n</div></figure>\n<!-- /wp:core-embed/wordpress -->','If it Cost You Nothing, It\'s Worth Nothing','','inherit','closed','closed','','100148-revision-v1','','','2020-07-25 20:43:05','2020-07-25 18:43:05','',100148,'https://expound.org.za/100148-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(100154,1,'2020-07-25 20:49:34','2020-07-25 18:49:34','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":100143} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/jesus-on-the-cross-1024x683.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-100143\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The headline sounds quite dreary and morbid, macabre if you like. And yet it captures the very object that Jesus came to pursue in His earthly mission. When you consider the plot through the lenses of Matthew the story is laden reverting twists and turns. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>So if Jesus came down to die, why did God protect Him  from the sword of Herod by instructing His parents to go and seek refuge in Egypt. I must confess that at some point I read the book of Matthew begrudgingly because I could not help but envision a God who preserved the life of His only begotten son by hiding him in Egypt and yet expose all the other innocent infants  to the indiscriminate genocidal feat of king Herod. But stick a little further with the story. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The King is Born</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The story is based on Matthew Chapter 2. Jesus is born in Bethlehem of Judea (verse 4) and wise men from the east arrive in Jerusalem in pursuit of the new born king. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:quote -->\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote\"><p>2 Now when Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea in the days of Herod the king, behold, there came wise men from the east to Jerusalem, Saying, Where is he that is born King of the Jews? for we have seen his star in the east, and are come to worship him.3 When Herod the king had heard these things, he was troubled, and all Jerusalem with him. 4 And when he had gathered all the chief priests and scribes of the people together, he demanded of them where Christ should be born.</p></blockquote>\n<!-- /wp:quote -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In verse 8 we learn that Herod requested the wise men to come back and give him a report on the birth of Jesus on their way back. In verse 11 they meet the new born Jesus and offer their gifts. Verse 12, they are warned in a dream that they should not return to Herod and thus they go back to their own country their own way. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:quote -->\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote\"><p>13 And when they were departed, behold, the angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream, saying, Arise, and take the young child and his mother, and flee into Egypt, and be thou there until I bring thee word: for Herod will seek the young child to destroy him. 14 When he arose, he took the young child and his mother by night, and departed into Egypt: Verse 16: Then Herod, when he saw that he was mocked of the wise men, was exceeding wroth, and sent forth, and slew all the children that were in Bethlehem, and in all the coasts thereof, from two years old and under, according to the time which he had diligently inquired of the wise men.</p></blockquote>\n<!-- /wp:quote -->\n\n<!-- wp:quote -->\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote\"><p>17 Then was fulfilled that which was spoken by Jeremiah the prophet, saying, 18 In Rama was there a voice heard, lamentation, and weeping, and great mourning, Rachel weeping for her children, and would not be comforted, because they are not.</p></blockquote>\n<!-- /wp:quote -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Jesus spared from Death?</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The twists of the plot in the preceding verses were the context of my trauma. Why did God spare only His son and not intervene to protect the all the innocent babies, the peers of Jesus who were to be butchered by Herod. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The question kept ringing in my sub conscience &nbsp;until it dawned to me that baby Jesus was not being spared from death at all. In fact He was being preserved for a “bigger” and more horrendous death. &nbsp;If Jesus were to be asked as to what He wanted to be when He grew up, I imagine Jesus would not say \"When I grow up I want to be a lawyer\", \"When I grow up, I want to be physician, or a tax collector or a earthly king\" as it were. But I imagine Him answer this way: “<strong>When I grow Up I want to Die”</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It gradually dawned to me that baby Jesus was only spared from this premature end to His earthly mission so that He could die a more significant, ignominious and disgraceful death that would suffice even for the ultimate redemption of all humanity including His peers butchered by King Herod. &nbsp;There is no doubt Jesus had to die to save humanity from ultimate death for the Wages of sin is death (Romans 6:23), but a&nbsp; major question remains: Why particularly the death on the cross:&nbsp; If he had been killed together with the other innocent babies wouldn\'t  that have sufficed as death? </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The Significance of the Cross</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>When we refer to the Deuteronomy we learn something about\nthe significance of hanging on a pole or a tree: Deuteronomy 21:23. \"..You\nmust not leave the body hanging on the pole overnight. Be sure to bury it that\nsame day, because anyone who is hung on a pole is under God’s curse.\" </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Also consider 2 Corinthians 5:21, For He made Him who knew no sin to be sin for us, that we might become the righteousness of God in Him. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Christ &nbsp;was not only made human to suffer in our stead, He was made sin.</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Therefore under the God\'s&nbsp; plan of salvation, it was necessary for our Saviour to become accursed under the Law in order to take away  the curse of the Law (eternal death) for sinners. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Refer to Galatians 3:10-14. Verse 13 makes it crystal clear:\nChrist redeemed us from the curse of the law by becoming a\ncurse for us, for it is written: “Cursed is everyone who is hung on a pole.” (Galatians:\n3:13)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Our failure as human beings to keep the law meant that we &nbsp;all are accursed under the law, Christ had to take our place and become accursed himself to give us full and substantive representation as a ransom. While in Matthew Chapter 2 we see a God who seems to favour His only begotten son by protecting Him from death; &nbsp;in Matthew 27 (45-46) we see a God so loving that He lets his only begotten son die not the ordinary death as His peers died in Matthew Chapter 2, but the second death that guarantees the redemption and resurrection of all those who die in faith. The price paid on the cross is thus sufficient for all humanity to be saved including the innocent babies butchered by King Herod. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Unfortunately the infants in Matthew  Chapter 2 died, but fortunately they did not perish, and the same applies to all who have died in faith. For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believes in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.(John 3:16)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>It is striking that as He was hanging on the cross Jesus declared: “It is finished.” Not “I am finished.” (John 19:30) The proclamation was the sure word that confirmed the fact of the irrevocable deliverable of Jesus\' mission, His ultimate death, the guarantee and surety of our salvation.</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','\"When I grow Up I want to Die\"','','inherit','closed','closed','','100142-revision-v1','','','2020-07-25 20:49:34','2020-07-25 18:49:34','',100142,'https://expound.org.za/100142-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(100155,1,'2020-07-28 07:47:27','2020-07-28 05:47:27','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":100151} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/3-wise-men-1024x950.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-100151\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The circumstances around the birth of Jesus bring to the\nfore profound insights about the Christian journey. The story unfolds as common\nplace if we have gotten too familiar with the narrative sometimes to the extent\nof missing new insights God wants to reveal to us. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In comparison with the focus of other new testament writers,\nMatthew\'s primary concern was to show and prove to the Jews that indeed Jesus\nwas their own according to the promises of the old testament.&nbsp;&nbsp; </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Have a look at the following verses:</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:quote -->\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote\"><p>“The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and will call him Immanuel” (Isaiah 7:14).</p></blockquote>\n<!-- /wp:quote -->\n\n<!-- wp:quote -->\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote\"><p>“But you, Bethlehem Ephrathah, though you are small among the clans of Judah, out of you will come for me one who will be ruler over Israel, whose origins are from of old, from ancient times” (Micah 5:2). </p></blockquote>\n<!-- /wp:quote -->\n\n<!-- wp:quote -->\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote\"><p>‘The days are coming,’ declares the Lord, ‘when I will raise up for David a righteous Branch’ ” (Jeremiah 23:5).</p></blockquote>\n<!-- /wp:quote -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Matthew\'s burden was to persuade Jews that Jesus was the\npromised Messiah every Jew was expecting notwithstanding the fact that He did\nnot set up an earthly kingdom. We see this clearly in the manner in which unlike\nJohn who traces the genealogy of Jesus all the way back to Adam to prove the universality\nof Christ and the gospel, Matthew traces the genealogy of Jesus up to Abraham\nto exalt the Hebrew-Jewish context. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Matthew 2 1-2</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:quote -->\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote\"><p>\"Now when Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea in the days of Herod the King, behold, there came wise men from the east to Jerusalem, Saying, \'Where is He that is born King of the Jews? We have seen His star in the east, and are come to worship Him.\'\"</p></blockquote>\n<!-- /wp:quote -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Matthew\'s interest in the specific inquiry of the wise men\nabout \"..the king of the Jews..\" cannot be missed. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3><strong>Faith is Substance </strong></h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are many fascinating take-aways form this story but\nwhat stick out for me are &nbsp;these three remarkable\nlevels of the radical faith of the wise men. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>1. Being non Jewish, the wise men believed and maintained\nkeen interest in the Promise of the Messiah they had never seen let alone\nknown. &nbsp;</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>2. The wise men believed in the promise against the unbelief\nof the religious leaders in the chosen Jewish nation. The obliviousness of the\nscribes did not cause them to doubt their convictions. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>3. The wise men believed in the universal kingship of baby\nJesus when they saw Him in His mother’s arms.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Friends, it is easy to believe a Jesus who sits on the throne\nand reigns in glory. But it takes radical optimism to believe in a little\nhelpless infant clutching at the mother\'s grip as the creator &nbsp;and King of the Universe. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It takes no effort at all to believe Christ reigns when He\nworks great miracles and answers our prayers. But it takes extra ordinary,\nradical optimism to believe in His Kingship and Lordship when He is seemingly\nsilent and invisible in darkest valleys. It is easy to burst in song when He\nhas done great things. But true Faith is to keep a song in your heart when all\nlooks grim and gloomy. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3><strong>How much has Christianity Cost You? </strong></h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Lastly, let\'s look at the sacrifice of the Wise men. Their sojourn\nis presented summarily within a verse or two and the extents of their\nsacrifices could be easily taken for granted. But these men came from the east,\nimplying a country of significant remoteness to Jerusalem. They would have had\nto endure taxing demands of a months-long journey. The journey ran into months and\nthey had to travel at night to follow the star. Most importantly, they did not\ncome empty handed. The gifts they offered for Jesus were of so much value that\nthey would suffice to sustain the family in their refugee status in Egypt. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Looking at the sacrifices of these wise men I cannot help\nbut pose these questions to myself and you… What has Christianity cost us? What\nload have we given up since we became &nbsp;Christian? What load have we taken up? How\nlong has been our journey of self-denial? </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>How far are prepared to walk this journey? Are we satisfied with the outcomes of the &nbsp;cost benefit analysis for this enterprise? &nbsp;What have we sacrificed For Christ? Has Christianity cost us not just our free time but any of our precious time? What are we willing to put in with our abstract and concrete resources? Are our priorities still the same, are the streams of our conversations still the same? How much has Christianity cost us? Yes the yoke is easy but it is still a yolk. Yes the burden is light, but it is still a burden. How much has Christianity cost us? </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Remember this, if it costs you nothing, it\'s worth nothing. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:core-embed/wordpress {\"url\":\"https://expound.org.za/when-i-grow-up-i-want-to-die/\",\"type\":\"wp-embed\",\"providerNameSlug\":\"expound\",\"className\":\"\"} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-embed-wordpress wp-block-embed is-type-wp-embed is-provider-expound\"><div class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\nhttps://expound.org.za/when-i-grow-up-i-want-to-die/\n</div></figure>\n<!-- /wp:core-embed/wordpress -->','If it Cost You Nothing, It\'s Worth Nothing','','inherit','closed','closed','','100148-revision-v1','','','2020-07-28 07:47:27','2020-07-28 05:47:27','',100148,'https://expound.org.za/100148-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99778,1,'2020-02-28 07:51:33','2020-02-28 05:51:33','<!-- wp:html -->\n[signinlocker id=\"99519\"] Post Content \n\n[/signinlocker]\n<!-- /wp:html -->','Sign Locker Configs','','inherit','closed','closed','','99776-revision-v1','','','2020-02-28 07:51:33','2020-02-28 05:51:33','',99776,'https://expound.org.za/99776-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99779,1,'2020-02-28 07:53:18','2020-02-28 05:53:18','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99763} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/parable-of-talents.jpg\" alt=\"The parable of talents commentry\" class=\"wp-image-99763\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In Matthew 25: 14-30 we are given a reverting account of a wealthy master who entrusted a measure of his wealth (in form of talents) among three of his &nbsp;servants before going to a far away country. Just like any parable given by Jesus, fiction looms more powerful than reality as narrative artistry gave Jesus latitude to poignantly illuminate complexes of human life in a manner that underscored His intimate proximity to the detail of human misery, wretchedness and potential under divine empowerment. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Revisit the parable: Matthew 25: 14-30 and then consider the following eight (8) cogent lessons we can draw from the account.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n \n<h3> 1. The measure of faithfulness and success is not safe keeping but increase. </h3>\nThe productive servants were called good and\nfaithful. Thus, to be “good and faithful” in the eyes of God has more to do\nwith multiplication and fruitfulness that it has to do with safe keeping as\nexemplified by the third servant who merely buried the talent for safe keeping.\nGod is not pleased when we aim for the bare minimum. \n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 2. Be fruitful and multiply </h3>\nThroughout the bible God employs the farming motif the basis of which is the imperative given to human beings and all creatures: “Be fruitful and Multiply”.&nbsp;\nGen 1:28 The master declared the first two servants as good and faithful\nbecause they had achieved the very object of every created creature: to\nmultiply and to be fruitful. The imperative is hardly exclusive to\nreproduction. God expects His children to multiply in all aspects of life. In\nJohn 15: 1-2 Jesus says, “I am the true vine and my Father is the husbandman. 2\nEvery branch in me that does not bear fruit He purges it and every branch in me\nthat bears fruit He purges that it may bring forth more fruit. The object of\nthe farming and fruit bearing motifs is aptly illumined in Galatians 5: 22.\nChildren of God must bear fruit and in Galatians 5:22 the combo of the expected\nfruitage is unpacked: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance,\nkindness, goodness, faithfulness.” &nbsp;Now\nthe question to be raised is: what are fruits for? Fruits are food, and thus\nthe fruit is for nourishment of the children of God. The purpose of fruit\nbearing is nourishment.\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 3. A talent is not an achievement </h3>\nAchievement is the outcome of a purposeful application of the “talent”. Natural\nendowments such as beauty, height, influence, eloquence, material belongings,\netc are not an achievement as it were. Achievement is the net outcome of the\nproductive and beneficial use of these talents or gifts.\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 4. God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful </h3>\n\nMany fear failure and are reluctant to go forward at God’s charge. We forget that God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful. The determination of whether one has failed or has succeeded is not premised on the outcomes. When we obey we have succeeded, when we disobey we have failed. Take note that it is the parable of talents and not the parable of the talented. As we like to say, if it’s God’s will He will pay the bill, He has provision for every vision and all His biddings are his enablings. “As the will of man co-operates with the\nwill of God, it becomes omnipotent. Whatever is to be done at His command, may\nbe accomplished in His strength. All His biddings are enablings.” Ellen G.\nWhite. Christ\'s Object Lessons, 333.\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 5. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness </h3>\nWhat we would habitually classify as laziness or mediocrity is addressed aptly by its first name. The unproductive servant is addressed as: “Thou wicked and slothful servant”. \n[signinlocker id=\"99519\"]\nThe master did not mince his words. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness. The master employed categoric descriptors to unmask the slothful servant and to succinctly “un”sugar coat the dead salt of wickedness underlying his conspicuous languor. If we consider the end of the story, the servant is not referred to some entrepreneurial development workshop or investment seminar for his up-skilling or rehabilitation. He is decisively cast into outer darkness where there is weeping and gnashing of teeth. Why such a seemingly exacting and harsh action from the\nmaster for a “small” matter of non-performance at best and laziness at worst? Fact\nof the matter is that laziness is our “acceptable” demon of wickedness. In the\nthralldom of laziness and slothfulness lies the same demonic species of ungodliness\nand wickedness as verily resident in the hue of rape, murder, adultery and all\nother hideous forms of sin which are visibly deplorable and revolting. \n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 6. God is the foundation of everything </h3>\n\nThe faithful servants referenced what the master had given them before enumerating their yield. This is crucial. Firstly,God is the foundation of everything. Secondly, God’s expectations are reasonable because they are predicated by provision. i.e. God does not demand an account over nothing. Life as a gift from God in itself. It is the foundation of everything and everyone who has breath in their nostrils can do something. The unfaithful servant did NOT make mention of the single talent given to him. The point of departure in his self-pitying response is to decimate the character of the master. He alleges: “I knew thee that thou art an hard man, reaping where thou hast not sown, and gathering where thou hast not sown.”\nWhile the unfaithful servant’s reportage takes off by decimating and vilifying\nthe character of the master, the attitude of the two faithful servants exudes\ngratitude as the appropriate point of departure. You may not have everything\nyou have wished for and desired but just take a moment to look around you and count your blessings. Perhaps you are frustrated over unfinished business and undone tasks but hey, today is another day God has granted us, a day we did not have to pay for, a fresh new chance we do not deserve. The least we can do is to seize the opportunity thankfully with both hands and gear up to deliver. A positive attitude trumps aptitude in the general ecosystem of life. \n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 7. There is no excuse for non-performance </h3>\nThe unfaithful servant attempted to contextualize and rationalize his indolent station on the basis of the alleged crudeness of the master’s character. (Matt 25:24) The master could have easily nullified his line of reasoning by simply reminding him that the task at hand had nothing to do with the hardness of master or any the imaginary traits the servant is expostulating about, the task was to\nmultiply the talent. But the master decided to tag along his futile and evasive\nline of thinking and prove that the logical end of his own reasoning is that he\ntherefore should have invested the talent as his perception of the master’s\ncharacter gave him more reason to invest that not to. In a nutshell, the master\nis saying to the servant “your reasons for non-performance are neither here nor\nthere”.&nbsp; The same is true for all our wafer-thin excuses for non-performance. They are neither here nor there.\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 8. Dissimilar Capabilities (Talents) Equal Exponentiality  </h3>\nDid you notice that the two faithful servants had 100% yields in their entrepreneurship? What that means is that the one with five talents did not bask in the laurels. He did not sit back and gloat over his lot for he understood that the five talents were not achievement but mere seed. He understood principle number one highlighted above that the measure of success and faithfulness is not safe keeping but increase (fruitfulness). The one with two talents did not nurse any gripe over being less endowed, He gratefully embraced what was allotted to him and similarly hit the ground running, thus both of them achieved 100% yield. \n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The reason people tend to worship outstandingly successful\npeople is because any trail blazing persona will tower like a demi-god to a\nfull time under achiever. The more we inch to the summit in our different\nspheres the less we covet, revere and venerate genius, and in fact the more we\nbegin to appreciate the fact that genius is not a specialized or exclusive\nendowment but the basic defining operative of persistent, resilient and diligent\npurposeful living. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Knowledge and skill are neither innate nor hardwired, they are acquired. The ability to acquire knowledge productively is developed and can be developed by anyone, it is honed in the grind of resilience and consistency.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Let me close off with a trenchant volley from an inspired\nauthor, </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>“Many whom God has qualified to do excellent work accomplish\nvery little, because they attempt little. Thousands pass through life as if\nthey had no definite object for which to live, no standard to reach. Such will\nobtain a reward proportionate to their works. Remember that you will never\nreach a higher standard than you yourself set. . . . Press with determination\nin the right direction, and circumstances will be your helpers, not your\nhindrances.” Ellen G. White Christ Object Lessons 331, 332)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Over to you. Ever spent some time on the Parable of Talents?\nWhat stood out for you? Please share your reflections on the comments section\nbelow. </p>\n\n[/signinlocker]\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','UnSugar Coating Dead Salt: 8 Lessons from the Parable of Talents','','inherit','closed','closed','','99762-revision-v1','','','2020-02-28 07:53:18','2020-02-28 05:53:18','',99762,'https://expound.org.za/99762-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99780,1,'2020-02-28 08:06:15','2020-02-28 06:06:15','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99763} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/parable-of-talents.jpg\" alt=\"The parable of talents commentry\" class=\"wp-image-99763\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In Matthew 25: 14-30 we are given a reverting account of a wealthy master who entrusted a measure of his wealth (in form of talents) among three of his &nbsp;servants before going to a far away country. Just like it is with any parable given by Jesus, fiction looms more powerful than reality as narrative artistry gave Jesus latitude to poignantly illuminate complexes of human life in a manner that underscored His intimate proximity to the detail of human misery, wretchedness and potential under divine empowerment. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Revisit the parable: Matthew 25: 14-30 and then consider the following eight (8) cogent lessons we can draw from the account.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n \n<h3> 1. The measure of faithfulness and success is not safe keeping but increase. </h3>\nThe productive servants were called good and\nfaithful. Thus, to be “good and faithful” in the eyes of God has more to do\nwith multiplication and fruitfulness that it has to do with safe keeping as\nexemplified by the third servant who merely buried the talent for safe keeping.\nGod is not pleased when we aim for the bare minimum. \n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 2. Be fruitful and multiply </h3>\nThroughout the bible God employs the farming motif the basis of which is the imperative given to human beings and all creatures: “Be fruitful and Multiply”.&nbsp;\nGen 1:28 The master declared the first two servants as good and faithful\nbecause they had achieved the very object of every created creature: to\nmultiply and to be fruitful. The imperative is hardly exclusive to\nreproduction. God expects His children to multiply in all aspects of life. In\nJohn 15: 1-2 Jesus says, “I am the true vine and my Father is the husbandman. 2\nEvery branch in me that does not bear fruit He purges it and every branch in me\nthat bears fruit He purges that it may bring forth more fruit. The object of\nthe farming and fruit bearing motifs is aptly illumined in Galatians 5: 22.\nChildren of God must bear fruit and in Galatians 5:22 the combo of the expected\nfruitage is unpacked: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance,\nkindness, goodness, faithfulness.” &nbsp;Now\nthe question to be raised is: what are fruits for? Fruits are food, and thus\nthe fruit is for nourishment of the children of God. The purpose of fruit\nbearing is nourishment.\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 3. A talent is not an achievement </h3>\nAchievement is the outcome of a purposeful application of the “talent”. Natural\nendowments such as beauty, height, influence, eloquence, material belongings,\netc are not an achievement as it were. Achievement is the net outcome of the\nproductive and beneficial use of these talents or gifts.\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 4. God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful </h3>\n\nMany fear failure and are reluctant to go forward at God’s charge. We forget that God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful. The determination of whether one has failed or has succeeded is not premised on the outcomes. When we obey we have succeeded, when we disobey we have failed. Take note that it is the parable of talents and not the parable of the talented. As we like to say, if it’s God’s will He will pay the bill, He has provision for every vision and all His biddings are his enablings. “As the will of man co-operates with the\nwill of God, it becomes omnipotent. Whatever is to be done at His command, may\nbe accomplished in His strength. All His biddings are enablings.” Ellen G.\nWhite. Christ\'s Object Lessons, 333.\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 5. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness </h3>\nWhat we would habitually classify as laziness or mediocrity is addressed aptly by its first name. The unproductive servant is addressed as: “Thou wicked and slothful servant”. \n[signinlocker id=\"99519\"]\nThe master did not mince his words. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness. The master employed categoric descriptors to unmask the slothful servant and to succinctly “un”sugar coat the dead salt of wickedness underlying his conspicuous languor. If we consider the end of the story, the servant is not referred to some entrepreneurial development workshop or investment seminar for his up-skilling or rehabilitation. He is decisively cast into outer darkness where there is weeping and gnashing of teeth. Why such a seemingly exacting and harsh action from the\nmaster for a “small” matter of non-performance at best and laziness at worst? Fact\nof the matter is that laziness is our “acceptable” demon of wickedness. In the\nthralldom of laziness and slothfulness lies the same demonic species of ungodliness\nand wickedness as verily resident in the hue of rape, murder, adultery and all\nother hideous forms of sin which are visibly deplorable and revolting. \n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 6. God is the foundation of everything </h3>\n\nThe faithful servants referenced what the master had given them before enumerating their yield. This is crucial. Firstly,God is the foundation of everything. Secondly, God’s expectations are reasonable because they are predicated by provision. i.e. God does not demand an account over nothing. Life as a gift from God in itself. It is the foundation of everything and everyone who has breath in their nostrils can do something. The unfaithful servant did NOT make mention of the single talent given to him. The point of departure in his self-pitying response is to decimate the character of the master. He alleges: “I knew thee that thou art an hard man, reaping where thou hast not sown, and gathering where thou hast not sown.”\nWhile the unfaithful servant’s reportage takes off by decimating and vilifying\nthe character of the master, the attitude of the two faithful servants exudes\ngratitude as the appropriate point of departure. You may not have everything\nyou have wished for and desired but just take a moment to look around you and count your blessings. Perhaps you are frustrated over unfinished business and undone tasks but hey, today is another day God has granted us, a day we did not have to pay for, a fresh new chance we do not deserve. The least we can do is to seize the opportunity thankfully with both hands and gear up to deliver. A positive attitude trumps aptitude in the general ecosystem of life. \n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 7. There is no excuse for non-performance </h3>\nThe unfaithful servant attempted to contextualize and rationalize his indolent station on the basis of the alleged crudeness of the master’s character. (Matt 25:24) The master could have easily nullified his line of reasoning by simply reminding him that the task at hand had nothing to do with the hardness of master or any the imaginary traits the servant is expostulating about, the task was to\nmultiply the talent. But the master decided to tag along his futile and evasive\nline of thinking and prove that the logical end of his own reasoning is that he\ntherefore should have invested the talent as his perception of the master’s\ncharacter gave him more reason to invest that not to. In a nutshell, the master\nis saying to the servant “your reasons for non-performance are neither here nor\nthere”.&nbsp; The same is true for all our wafer-thin excuses for non-performance. They are neither here nor there.\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 8. Dissimilar Capabilities (Talents) Equal Exponentiality  </h3>\nDid you notice that the two faithful servants had 100% yields in their entrepreneurship? What that means is that the one with five talents did not bask in the laurels. He did not sit back and gloat over his lot for he understood that the five talents were not achievement but mere seed. He understood principle number one highlighted above that the measure of success and faithfulness is not safe keeping but increase (fruitfulness). The one with two talents did not nurse any gripe over being less endowed, He gratefully embraced what was allotted to him and similarly hit the ground running, thus both of them achieved 100% yield. \n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The reason people tend to worship outstandingly successful\npeople is because any trail blazing persona will tower like a demi-god to a\nfull time under achiever. The more we inch to the summit in our different\nspheres the less we covet, revere and venerate genius, and in fact the more we\nbegin to appreciate the fact that genius is not a specialized or exclusive\nendowment but the basic defining operative of persistent, resilient and diligent\npurposeful living. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Knowledge and skill are neither innate nor hardwired, they are acquired. The ability to acquire knowledge productively is developed and can be developed by anyone, it is honed in the grind of resilience and consistency.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Let me close off with a trenchant volley from an inspired\nauthor, </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>“Many whom God has qualified to do excellent work accomplish\nvery little, because they attempt little. Thousands pass through life as if\nthey had no definite object for which to live, no standard to reach. Such will\nobtain a reward proportionate to their works. Remember that you will never\nreach a higher standard than you yourself set. . . . Press with determination\nin the right direction, and circumstances will be your helpers, not your\nhindrances.” Ellen G. White Christ Object Lessons 331, 332)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Over to you. Ever spent some time on the Parable of Talents?\nWhat stood out for you? Please share your reflections on the comments section\nbelow. </p>\n\n[/signinlocker]\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','UnSugar Coating Dead Salt: 8 Lessons from the Parable of Talents','','inherit','closed','closed','','99762-revision-v1','','','2020-02-28 08:06:15','2020-02-28 06:06:15','',99762,'https://expound.org.za/99762-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99781,1,'2020-02-28 08:08:09','2020-02-28 06:08:09','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99763} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/parable-of-talents.jpg\" alt=\"The parable of talents commentry\" class=\"wp-image-99763\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In Matthew 25: 14-30 we are given a reverting account of a wealthy master who entrusted a measure of his wealth (in form of talents) among three of his  servants before going to a far away country. Just like it is with any parable given by Jesus, <a href=\"https://expound.org.za/job-chapter-1-part-1/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" aria-label=\"fiction looms more powerful than reality (opens in a new tab)\">fiction looms more powerful than reality</a> as narrative artistry gave Jesus latitude to poignantly illuminate complexes of human life in a manner that underscored His intimate proximity to the detail of human misery, wretchedness and potential under divine empowerment. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Revisit the parable: Matthew 25: 14-30 and then consider the following eight (8) cogent lessons we can draw from the account.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n \n<h3> 1. The measure of faithfulness and success is not safe keeping but increase. </h3>\nThe productive servants were called good and\nfaithful. Thus, to be “good and faithful” in the eyes of God has more to do\nwith multiplication and fruitfulness that it has to do with safe keeping as\nexemplified by the third servant who merely buried the talent for safe keeping.\nGod is not pleased when we aim for the bare minimum. \n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 2. Be fruitful and multiply </h3>\nThroughout the bible God employs the farming motif the basis of which is the imperative given to human beings and all creatures: “Be fruitful and Multiply”.&nbsp;\nGen 1:28 The master declared the first two servants as good and faithful\nbecause they had achieved the very object of every created creature: to\nmultiply and to be fruitful. The imperative is hardly exclusive to\nreproduction. God expects His children to multiply in all aspects of life. In\nJohn 15: 1-2 Jesus says, “I am the true vine and my Father is the husbandman. 2\nEvery branch in me that does not bear fruit He purges it and every branch in me\nthat bears fruit He purges that it may bring forth more fruit. The object of\nthe farming and fruit bearing motifs is aptly illumined in Galatians 5: 22.\nChildren of God must bear fruit and in Galatians 5:22 the combo of the expected\nfruitage is unpacked: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance,\nkindness, goodness, faithfulness.” &nbsp;Now\nthe question to be raised is: what are fruits for? Fruits are food, and thus\nthe fruit is for nourishment of the children of God. The purpose of fruit\nbearing is nourishment.\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 3. A talent is not an achievement </h3>\nAchievement is the outcome of a purposeful application of the “talent”. Natural\nendowments such as beauty, height, influence, eloquence, material belongings,\netc are not an achievement as it were. Achievement is the net outcome of the\nproductive and beneficial use of these talents or gifts.\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 4. God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful </h3>\n\nMany fear failure and are reluctant to go forward at God’s charge. We forget that God has not asked us to be successful, He Has only asked us to be faithful. The determination of whether one has failed or has succeeded is not premised on the outcomes. When we obey we have succeeded, when we disobey we have failed. Take note that it is the parable of talents and not the parable of the talented. As we like to say, if it’s God’s will He will pay the bill, He has provision for every vision and all His biddings are his enablings. “As the will of man co-operates with the\nwill of God, it becomes omnipotent. Whatever is to be done at His command, may\nbe accomplished in His strength. All His biddings are enablings.” Ellen G.\nWhite. Christ\'s Object Lessons, 333.\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 5. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness </h3>\nWhat we would habitually classify as laziness or mediocrity is addressed aptly by its first name. The unproductive servant is addressed as: “Thou wicked and slothful servant”. \n[signinlocker id=\"99519\"]\nThe master did not mince his words. Laziness is the sugar with which we coat the dead salt of ungodliness. The master employed categoric descriptors to unmask the slothful servant and to succinctly “un”sugar coat the dead salt of wickedness underlying his conspicuous languor. If we consider the end of the story, the servant is not referred to some entrepreneurial development workshop or investment seminar for his up-skilling or rehabilitation. He is decisively cast into outer darkness where there is weeping and gnashing of teeth. Why such a seemingly exacting and harsh action from the\nmaster for a “small” matter of non-performance at best and laziness at worst? Fact\nof the matter is that laziness is our “acceptable” demon of wickedness. In the\nthralldom of laziness and slothfulness lies the same demonic species of ungodliness\nand wickedness as verily resident in the hue of rape, murder, adultery and all\nother hideous forms of sin which are visibly deplorable and revolting. \n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 6. God is the foundation of everything </h3>\n\nThe faithful servants referenced what the master had given them before enumerating their yield. This is crucial. Firstly,God is the foundation of everything. Secondly, God’s expectations are reasonable because they are predicated by provision. i.e. God does not demand an account over nothing. Life as a gift from God in itself. It is the foundation of everything and everyone who has breath in their nostrils can do something. The unfaithful servant did NOT make mention of the single talent given to him. The point of departure in his self-pitying response is to decimate the character of the master. He alleges: “I knew thee that thou art an hard man, reaping where thou hast not sown, and gathering where thou hast not sown.”\nWhile the unfaithful servant’s reportage takes off by decimating and vilifying\nthe character of the master, the attitude of the two faithful servants exudes\ngratitude as the appropriate point of departure. You may not have everything\nyou have wished for and desired but just take a moment to look around you and count your blessings. Perhaps you are frustrated over unfinished business and undone tasks but hey, today is another day God has granted us, a day we did not have to pay for, a fresh new chance we do not deserve. The least we can do is to seize the opportunity thankfully with both hands and gear up to deliver. A positive attitude trumps aptitude in the general ecosystem of life. \n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 7. There is no excuse for non-performance </h3>\nThe unfaithful servant attempted to contextualize and rationalize his indolent station on the basis of the alleged crudeness of the master’s character. (Matt 25:24) The master could have easily nullified his line of reasoning by simply reminding him that the task at hand had nothing to do with the hardness of master or any the imaginary traits the servant is expostulating about, the task was to\nmultiply the talent. But the master decided to tag along his futile and evasive\nline of thinking and prove that the logical end of his own reasoning is that he\ntherefore should have invested the talent as his perception of the master’s\ncharacter gave him more reason to invest that not to. In a nutshell, the master\nis saying to the servant “your reasons for non-performance are neither here nor\nthere”.&nbsp; The same is true for all our wafer-thin excuses for non-performance. They are neither here nor there.\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<h3> 8. Dissimilar Capabilities (Talents) Equal Exponentiality  </h3>\nDid you notice that the two faithful servants had 100% yields in their entrepreneurship? What that means is that the one with five talents did not bask in the laurels. He did not sit back and gloat over his lot for he understood that the five talents were not achievement but mere seed. He understood principle number one highlighted above that the measure of success and faithfulness is not safe keeping but increase (fruitfulness). The one with two talents did not nurse any gripe over being less endowed, He gratefully embraced what was allotted to him and similarly hit the ground running, thus both of them achieved 100% yield. \n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The reason people tend to worship outstandingly successful\npeople is because any trail blazing persona will tower like a demi-god to a\nfull time under achiever. The more we inch to the summit in our different\nspheres the less we covet, revere and venerate genius, and in fact the more we\nbegin to appreciate the fact that genius is not a specialized or exclusive\nendowment but the basic defining operative of persistent, resilient and diligent\npurposeful living. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Knowledge and skill are neither innate nor hardwired, they are acquired. The ability to acquire knowledge productively is developed and can be developed by anyone, it is honed in the grind of resilience and consistency.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Let me close off with a trenchant volley from an inspired\nauthor, </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>“Many whom God has qualified to do excellent work accomplish\nvery little, because they attempt little. Thousands pass through life as if\nthey had no definite object for which to live, no standard to reach. Such will\nobtain a reward proportionate to their works. Remember that you will never\nreach a higher standard than you yourself set. . . . Press with determination\nin the right direction, and circumstances will be your helpers, not your\nhindrances.” Ellen G. White Christ Object Lessons 331, 332)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Over to you. Ever spent some time on the Parable of Talents?\nWhat stood out for you? Please share your reflections on the comments section\nbelow. </p>\n\n[/signinlocker]\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','UnSugar Coating Dead Salt: 8 Lessons from the Parable of Talents','','inherit','closed','closed','','99762-revision-v1','','','2020-02-28 08:08:09','2020-02-28 06:08:09','',99762,'https://expound.org.za/99762-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99782,1,'2020-02-28 09:33:30','2020-02-28 07:33:30','<!-- wp:html -->\n[signinlocker id=\"99519\"] Locked Post Content \n\n[/signinlocker]\n<!-- /wp:html -->','Sign Locker Configs','','inherit','closed','closed','','99776-revision-v1','','','2020-02-28 09:33:30','2020-02-28 07:33:30','',99776,'https://expound.org.za/99776-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99783,1,'2020-03-02 10:57:11','2020-03-02 08:57:11','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99784} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99784\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3 style=\"text-align:justify!important;\">Self is the invariable abattoir where many relationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Just like the old adage goes, it takes two to tango. In any given relationship paradigm there are at least two entities (persons) involved. A relationship is a social real estate whose ecosystem is the sum total of the net contributions of the two persons involved. The relationship stands apart as an independent entity which feeds on a diet radically different from that of its constituent persons, for it not just to survive but to flourish. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are certain things that are otherwise optional and yet compulsory for a relationship to work. You mean like really “compulsory” when it’s a relationship of two consenting adults? Indeed! Communication, intimacy, trust, respect, love, submission etc constitute the mandatory diet the relationship cannot live without. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Relationships fail because people confuse their personal needs and preferences for the needs of the relationship. Because of this grave mistake, persons then tend to think that needs of their relationships (which in many cases are confused for personal preferences and idiosyncrasies), are optional. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the thing, maybe you don’t like to communicate, perhaps you don’t feel like investing in quality time with your partner, or it could be that you have genuine trust issues, and maybe you struggle with respect, love, submission etc, however as far as the survival and flourishing of your relationship is concerned these aspects are neither optional nor negotiable.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99795} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/common-reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99795\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It helps to understand and view the relationship as an entity separate from its persons just like it is with a business concept. Most of us understand that the moment you start running a business on personal preferences and whims at that very moment you have killed it. You may not like sales,&nbsp; or marketing management or even financial literacy, etc, however your enterprise needs a diligent praxis of these disciplines to survive and grow. As far as the survival and growth of your business is concerned these aspects are not negotiable. If you can\'t appreciate that then do not run a business.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work. If you are caught up in this rigmarole, what you are seeking to do is as futile as trying to lobby reality for custom settings. Adults caught up in this predicament are essentially adolescents trapped in big people’s bodies. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The shallow concept of mutual consent is another problem</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The issue of mutual consent in this context pertains to the essentials that keep the relationship growing and thriving and not anything untoward as it were. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the standard grade appreciation of the basis of functional relationships: Mutual Consent on initiatives or propositions. This simply refers to getting the buy-in of your partner for whatever you seek to do or accomplish with him/her. Quite straight forward this, no rattles nor blisters here. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>However, there is a higher grade appreciation of the basis of not only functional but flourishing relationships:&nbsp; Comprehensive Mutual Consent i.e. mutual consent on the both axes of propositioning as well as declining.  This refers to mutual consent being exercised on both ends of the communicative transaction. In other words, the one making an initiative seeks mutual consent of the other party and the target of the motion also seeks mutual consent in a case where the bid is declined. The fact is understandably quite elusive to many.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>We tend to emphasize consent on one end and yet de-emphasize it on the other. For example, if your partner wants to spend time or take a walk with you, usually the default setting is to check if you are in the mood or if you would like to do that or not, and if you don\'t feel like it you simply dispense a reflex,  knee-jerk and hardly thought-out unilateral \"No!\",  whereas a well negotiated consensual, loving and mutual turn down will serve the relationship better than a self-conceived, monocratic and veto-powered decline. When confronted with a decision making process that has a bearing on the relationship, the question to ask is not: \"Do I want to do this or not?\", the appropriate question to ask is, \"Does the relationship need this or not?\" A balanced way forward should be negotiated within that premise.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong> Many people tend to exercise veto power (unilateral decision making) in declining propositions or initiatives. This is the low hanging fruit of the insidious plague of self-centeredness. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>You will surely win the argument but lose the relationship</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember the sharpness of your argument for, or against it (whatever the initiative is) is completely irrelevant and lopsided if the needs of the significant other are trivialized. If you persist, you will surely win the argument but lose the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract wherein you get what you want and do not get what you do not want in the context of comprehensive mutual consent. A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract wherein you get what you want which serves the relationship. Among many other equally important factors, failure to understand and live by the principle of comprehensive mutual consent is the major reason why relationships fail. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Mental Hygiene on Why Relationships Fail','','publish','open','open','','the-reason-why-relationships-fail','','','2020-03-06 13:13:27','2020-03-06 11:13:27','',0,'https://expound.org.za/?p=99783',0,'post','',0),(99784,1,'2020-02-28 11:08:03','2020-02-28 09:08:03','','reasons-why-relationships-fail','','inherit','open','closed','','reasons-why-relationships-fail','','','2020-02-28 11:08:03','2020-02-28 09:08:03','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg',0,'attachment','image/jpeg',0),(99785,1,'2020-02-28 11:24:52','2020-02-28 09:24:52','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99784} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99784\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3> Self is the invariable abattoir where many relationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Just like the old adage goes, it takes two to tango. In any\ngiven relationship paradigm there are at least two entities (persons). The\nrelationship is a social real estate whose ecosystem is the sum total of the net\ncontributions of the two persons involved. The relationship stands apart as an\nindependent entity which feeds on a radically different diet for it not just to\nthrive but to flourish. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are certain things that are compulsory for the\nrelationship to work. You mean like really “compulsory” when it’s a\nrelationship of two consenting adults? Indeed! Communication, intimacy, trust,\nrespect, love, submission etc constitute the mandatory diet the relationship cannot\nlive without. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Relationships fail because people confuse their personal\nneeds and preferences for the needs of the relationship. Because of this grave\nmistake persons then tend to think that needs of their relationships (which in\nmany cases are confused for personal preferences and idiosyncrasies), are optional.\n</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the thing, maybe you don’t like to communicate,\nperhaps you don’t feel like intimacy, it could be that you have genuine trust\nissues, and maybe you struggle with respect, love, submission etc, however as\nfar as the survival and flourishing of your relationship is concerned these\naspects are neither optional nor negotiable.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3> Self is the invariable abattoir where many\nrelationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It helps to understand and view the relationship as an\nentity separate from its persons just like it is with a business. Most of us\nunderstand that the moment you start running a business on personal preferences\nand whims at that very moment you have killed it. You may not like sales,&nbsp; or marketing management or even financial\nliteracy, etc however your enterprise needs these aspects to survive. As far as\nthe survival and growth of your business is concerned these aspects are not\nnegotiable. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their\nwhims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work.\nIf you are caught up in this rigmarole, what you are seeking to do is as futile\nas trying to lobby reality for custom settings. Adults caught up in this\npredicament are essentially adolescents trapped in big people’s bodies. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The shallow concept of mutual consent is another problem</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the standard grade appreciation of the basis of\nfunctional relationships: Mutual Consent!</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>However, there is higher grade appreciation of the basis of not only functional but flourishing relationships:  Comprehensive Mutual Consent i.e. mutual consent on both the Yeses (Dos) and the Nos (Dont\'s)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>We tend to emphasize consensual Yeses (Dos) and neglect the\nconsensual nos (don’ts). For example, if your partner wants to spend time with\nyou, a negotiated consensual, loving and mutual No will serve the relationship\nbetter than a self-conceived, monocratic and unilateral No. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Many people think it is only Dos or Yeses that must be consensual while the don’ts and Nos do not have to be agreed upon. This too is a grave mistake. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>You will surely win the argument but lose the relationship</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember the sharpness of your argument for, or against it is\ncompletely irrelevant if the needs of the significant other are trivialized. You\nwill surely win the argument but lose the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A good relationship is not a social contract in which you\nget what you want, it is a social contract where in you get what you want which\nserves the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Mental Hygiene on Why Relationships Fail','','inherit','closed','closed','','99783-revision-v1','','','2020-02-28 11:24:52','2020-02-28 09:24:52','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/99783-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99786,1,'2020-02-28 11:25:58','2020-02-28 09:25:58','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99784} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99784\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Self is the invariable abattoir where many relationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Just like the old adage goes, it takes two to tango. In any\ngiven relationship paradigm there are at least two entities (persons). The\nrelationship is a social real estate whose ecosystem is the sum total of the net\ncontributions of the two persons involved. The relationship stands apart as an\nindependent entity which feeds on a radically different diet for it not just to\nthrive but to flourish. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are certain things that are compulsory for the\nrelationship to work. You mean like really “compulsory” when it’s a\nrelationship of two consenting adults? Indeed! Communication, intimacy, trust,\nrespect, love, submission etc constitute the mandatory diet the relationship cannot\nlive without. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Relationships fail because people confuse their personal\nneeds and preferences for the needs of the relationship. Because of this grave\nmistake persons then tend to think that needs of their relationships (which in\nmany cases are confused for personal preferences and idiosyncrasies), are optional.\n</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the thing, maybe you don’t like to communicate,\nperhaps you don’t feel like intimacy, it could be that you have genuine trust\nissues, and maybe you struggle with respect, love, submission etc, however as\nfar as the survival and flourishing of your relationship is concerned these\naspects are neither optional nor negotiable.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3> Self is the invariable abattoir where many\nrelationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It helps to understand and view the relationship as an\nentity separate from its persons just like it is with a business. Most of us\nunderstand that the moment you start running a business on personal preferences\nand whims at that very moment you have killed it. You may not like sales,&nbsp; or marketing management or even financial\nliteracy, etc however your enterprise needs these aspects to survive. As far as\nthe survival and growth of your business is concerned these aspects are not\nnegotiable. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their\nwhims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work.\nIf you are caught up in this rigmarole, what you are seeking to do is as futile\nas trying to lobby reality for custom settings. Adults caught up in this\npredicament are essentially adolescents trapped in big people’s bodies. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The shallow concept of mutual consent is another problem</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the standard grade appreciation of the basis of\nfunctional relationships: Mutual Consent!</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>However, there is higher grade appreciation of the basis of not only functional but flourishing relationships:  Comprehensive Mutual Consent i.e. mutual consent on both the Yeses (Dos) and the Nos (Dont\'s)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>We tend to emphasize consensual Yeses (Dos) and neglect the\nconsensual nos (don’ts). For example, if your partner wants to spend time with\nyou, a negotiated consensual, loving and mutual No will serve the relationship\nbetter than a self-conceived, monocratic and unilateral No. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Many people think it is only Dos or Yeses that must be consensual while the don’ts and Nos do not have to be agreed upon. This too is a grave mistake. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>You will surely win the argument but lose the relationship</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember the sharpness of your argument for, or against it is\ncompletely irrelevant if the needs of the significant other are trivialized. You\nwill surely win the argument but lose the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A good relationship is not a social contract in which you\nget what you want, it is a social contract where in you get what you want which\nserves the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Mental Hygiene on Why Relationships Fail','','inherit','closed','closed','','99783-revision-v1','','','2020-02-28 11:25:58','2020-02-28 09:25:58','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/99783-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99787,1,'2020-02-28 11:27:28','2020-02-28 09:27:28','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99784} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99784\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Self is the invariable abattoir where many relationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Just like the old adage goes, it takes two to tango. In any\ngiven relationship paradigm there are at least two entities (persons). The\nrelationship is a social real estate whose ecosystem is the sum total of the net\ncontributions of the two persons involved. The relationship stands apart as an\nindependent entity which feeds on a radically different diet for it not just to\nthrive but to flourish. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are certain things that are compulsory for the\nrelationship to work. You mean like really “compulsory” when it’s a\nrelationship of two consenting adults? Indeed! Communication, intimacy, trust,\nrespect, love, submission etc constitute the mandatory diet the relationship cannot\nlive without. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Relationships fail because people confuse their personal\nneeds and preferences for the needs of the relationship. Because of this grave\nmistake persons then tend to think that needs of their relationships (which in\nmany cases are confused for personal preferences and idiosyncrasies), are optional.\n</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the thing, maybe you don’t like to communicate,\nperhaps you don’t feel like intimacy, it could be that you have genuine trust\nissues, and maybe you struggle with respect, love, submission etc, however as\nfar as the survival and flourishing of your relationship is concerned these\naspects are neither optional nor negotiable.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3> Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It helps to understand and view the relationship as an\nentity separate from its persons just like it is with a business. Most of us\nunderstand that the moment you start running a business on personal preferences\nand whims at that very moment you have killed it. You may not like sales,&nbsp; or marketing management or even financial\nliteracy, etc however your enterprise needs these aspects to survive. As far as\nthe survival and growth of your business is concerned these aspects are not\nnegotiable. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their\nwhims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work.\nIf you are caught up in this rigmarole, what you are seeking to do is as futile\nas trying to lobby reality for custom settings. Adults caught up in this\npredicament are essentially adolescents trapped in big people’s bodies. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The shallow concept of mutual consent is another problem</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the standard grade appreciation of the basis of\nfunctional relationships: Mutual Consent!</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>However, there is higher grade appreciation of the basis of not only functional but flourishing relationships:  Comprehensive Mutual Consent i.e. mutual consent on both the Yeses (Dos) and the Nos (Dont\'s)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>We tend to emphasize consensual Yeses (Dos) and neglect the\nconsensual nos (don’ts). For example, if your partner wants to spend time with\nyou, a negotiated consensual, loving and mutual No will serve the relationship\nbetter than a self-conceived, monocratic and unilateral No. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Many people think it is only Dos or Yeses that must be consensual while the don’ts and Nos do not have to be agreed upon. This too is a grave mistake. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>You will surely win the argument but lose the relationship</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember the sharpness of your argument for, or against it is\ncompletely irrelevant if the needs of the significant other are trivialized. You\nwill surely win the argument but lose the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A good relationship is not a social contract in which you\nget what you want, it is a social contract where in you get what you want which\nserves the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Mental Hygiene on Why Relationships Fail','','inherit','closed','closed','','99783-revision-v1','','','2020-02-28 11:27:28','2020-02-28 09:27:28','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/99783-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99788,1,'2020-02-28 11:28:19','2020-02-28 09:28:19','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99784} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99784\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Self is the invariable abattoir where many relationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Just like the old adage goes, it takes two to tango. In any\ngiven relationship paradigm there are at least two entities (persons). The\nrelationship is a social real estate whose ecosystem is the sum total of the net\ncontributions of the two persons involved. The relationship stands apart as an\nindependent entity which feeds on a radically different diet for it not just to\nthrive but to flourish. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are certain things that are compulsory for the\nrelationship to work. You mean like really “compulsory” when it’s a\nrelationship of two consenting adults? Indeed! Communication, intimacy, trust,\nrespect, love, submission etc constitute the mandatory diet the relationship cannot\nlive without. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Relationships fail because people confuse their personal\nneeds and preferences for the needs of the relationship. Because of this grave\nmistake persons then tend to think that needs of their relationships (which in\nmany cases are confused for personal preferences and idiosyncrasies), are optional.\n</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the thing, maybe you don’t like to communicate,\nperhaps you don’t feel like intimacy, it could be that you have genuine trust\nissues, and maybe you struggle with respect, love, submission etc, however as\nfar as the survival and flourishing of your relationship is concerned these\naspects are neither optional nor negotiable.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3> Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It helps to understand and view the relationship as an\nentity separate from its persons just like it is with a business. Most of us\nunderstand that the moment you start running a business on personal preferences\nand whims at that very moment you have killed it. You may not like sales,&nbsp; or marketing management or even financial\nliteracy, etc however your enterprise needs these aspects to survive. As far as\nthe survival and growth of your business is concerned these aspects are not\nnegotiable. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their\nwhims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work.\nIf you are caught up in this rigmarole, what you are seeking to do is as futile\nas trying to lobby reality for custom settings. Adults caught up in this\npredicament are essentially adolescents trapped in big people’s bodies. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The shallow concept of mutual consent is another problem</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the standard grade appreciation of the basis of\nfunctional relationships: Mutual Consent!</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>However, there is a higher grade appreciation of the basis of not only functional but flourishing relationships:  Comprehensive Mutual Consent i.e. mutual consent on both the Yeses (Dos) and the Nos (Dont\'s)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>We tend to emphasize consensual Yeses (Dos) and neglect the\nconsensual nos (don’ts). For example, if your partner wants to spend time with\nyou, a negotiated consensual, loving and mutual No will serve the relationship\nbetter than a self-conceived, monocratic and unilateral No. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Many people think it is only Dos or Yeses that must be consensual while the don’ts and Nos do not have to be agreed upon. This too is a grave mistake. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>You will surely win the argument but lose the relationship</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember the sharpness of your argument for, or against it is\ncompletely irrelevant if the needs of the significant other are trivialized. You\nwill surely win the argument but lose the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A good relationship is not a social contract in which you\nget what you want, it is a social contract where in you get what you want which\nserves the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Mental Hygiene on Why Relationships Fail','','inherit','closed','closed','','99783-revision-v1','','','2020-02-28 11:28:19','2020-02-28 09:28:19','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/99783-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99789,1,'2020-02-28 11:44:17','2020-02-28 09:44:17','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99784} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99784\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Self is the invariable abattoir where many relationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Just like the old adage goes, it takes two to tango. In any\ngiven relationship paradigm there are at least two entities (persons). The\nrelationship is a social real estate whose ecosystem is the sum total of the net\ncontributions of the two persons involved. The relationship stands apart as an\nindependent entity which feeds on a radically different diet for it not just to\nthrive but to flourish. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are certain things that are compulsory for the\nrelationship to work. You mean like really “compulsory” when it’s a\nrelationship of two consenting adults? Indeed! Communication, intimacy, trust,\nrespect, love, submission etc constitute the mandatory diet the relationship cannot\nlive without. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Relationships fail because people confuse their personal\nneeds and preferences for the needs of the relationship. Because of this grave\nmistake persons then tend to think that needs of their relationships (which in\nmany cases are confused for personal preferences and idiosyncrasies), are optional.\n</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the thing, maybe you don’t like to communicate,\nperhaps you don’t feel like intimacy, it could be that you have genuine trust\nissues, and maybe you struggle with respect, love, submission etc, however as\nfar as the survival and flourishing of your relationship is concerned these\naspects are neither optional nor negotiable.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3> Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It helps to understand and view the relationship as an\nentity separate from its persons just like it is with a business. Most of us\nunderstand that the moment you start running a business on personal preferences\nand whims at that very moment you have killed it. You may not like sales,&nbsp; or marketing management or even financial\nliteracy, etc however your enterprise needs these aspects to survive. As far as\nthe survival and growth of your business is concerned these aspects are not\nnegotiable. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their\nwhims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work.\nIf you are caught up in this rigmarole, what you are seeking to do is as futile\nas trying to lobby reality for custom settings. Adults caught up in this\npredicament are essentially adolescents trapped in big people’s bodies. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The shallow concept of mutual consent is another problem</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the standard grade appreciation of the basis of\nfunctional relationships: Mutual Consent!</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>However, there is a higher grade appreciation of the basis of not only functional but flourishing relationships:  Comprehensive Mutual Consent i.e. mutual consent on both the Yeses (Dos) and the Nos (Dont\'s)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>We tend to emphasize consensual Yeses (Dos) and neglect the\nconsensual nos (don’ts). For example, if your partner wants to spend time with\nyou, the default setting is to check if you are in the mood or if you would like to do that or not whereas a negotiated consensual, loving and mutual No will serve the relationship better than a self-conceived, monocratic and unilateral No. When confronted with a decision making process that has a hefty bearing on the relationship, the question to ask is not: do I want to do this or not? the appropriate question to ask is does the relationship need this or not? A balanced way forward should be negotiated in that premise. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Many people think it is only Dos or Yeses that must be consensual while the don’ts and Nos do not have to be agreed upon. This too is a grave mistake. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>You will surely win the argument but lose the relationship</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember the sharpness of your argument for, or against it is\ncompletely irrelevant if the needs of the significant other are trivialized. You\nwill surely win the argument but lose the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A good relationship is not a social contract in which you\nget what you want, it is a social contract where in you get what you want which\nserves the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Mental Hygiene on Why Relationships Fail','','inherit','closed','closed','','99783-revision-v1','','','2020-02-28 11:44:17','2020-02-28 09:44:17','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/99783-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99790,1,'2020-02-28 11:46:56','2020-02-28 09:46:56','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99784} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99784\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Self is the invariable abattoir where many relationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Just like the old adage goes, it takes two to tango. In any\ngiven relationship paradigm there are at least two entities (persons) involved. The relationship is a social real estate whose ecosystem is the sum total of the net contributions of the two persons involved. The relationship stands apart as an\nindependent entity which feeds on a diet radically different from that of its constituent persons, for it not just to thrive but to flourish. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are certain things that are compulsory for the\nrelationship to work. You mean like really “compulsory” when it’s a\nrelationship of two consenting adults? Indeed! Communication, intimacy, trust,\nrespect, love, submission etc constitute the mandatory diet the relationship cannot\nlive without. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Relationships fail because people confuse their personal\nneeds and preferences for the needs of the relationship. Because of this grave\nmistake persons then tend to think that needs of their relationships (which in\nmany cases are confused for personal preferences and idiosyncrasies), are optional.\n</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the thing, maybe you don’t like to communicate,\nperhaps you don’t feel like intimacy, it could be that you have genuine trust\nissues, and maybe you struggle with respect, love, submission etc, however as\nfar as the survival and flourishing of your relationship is concerned these\naspects are neither optional nor negotiable.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3> Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It helps to understand and view the relationship as an\nentity separate from its persons just like it is with a business. Most of us\nunderstand that the moment you start running a business on personal preferences\nand whims at that very moment you have killed it. You may not like sales,&nbsp; or marketing management or even financial\nliteracy, etc however your enterprise needs these aspects to survive. As far as\nthe survival and growth of your business is concerned these aspects are not\nnegotiable. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their\nwhims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work.\nIf you are caught up in this rigmarole, what you are seeking to do is as futile\nas trying to lobby reality for custom settings. Adults caught up in this\npredicament are essentially adolescents trapped in big people’s bodies. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The shallow concept of mutual consent is another problem</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the standard grade appreciation of the basis of\nfunctional relationships: Mutual Consent!</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>However, there is a higher grade appreciation of the basis of not only functional but flourishing relationships:  Comprehensive Mutual Consent i.e. mutual consent on both the Yeses (Dos) and the Nos (Dont\'s)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>We tend to emphasize consensual Yeses (Dos) and neglect the\nconsensual nos (don’ts). For example, if your partner wants to spend time with\nyou, the default setting is to check if you are in the mood or if you would like to do that or not whereas a negotiated consensual, loving and mutual No will serve the relationship better than a self-conceived, monocratic and unilateral No. When confronted with a decision making process that has a hefty bearing on the relationship, the question to ask is not: do I want to do this or not? the appropriate question to ask is does the relationship need this or not? A balanced way forward should be negotiated in that premise. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Many people think it is only Dos or Yeses that must be consensual while the don’ts and Nos do not have to be agreed upon. This too is a grave mistake. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>You will surely win the argument but lose the relationship</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember the sharpness of your argument for, or against it is\ncompletely irrelevant if the needs of the significant other are trivialized. You\nwill surely win the argument but lose the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A good relationship is not a social contract in which you\nget what you want, it is a social contract where in you get what you want which\nserves the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Mental Hygiene on Why Relationships Fail','','inherit','closed','closed','','99783-revision-v1','','','2020-02-28 11:46:56','2020-02-28 09:46:56','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/99783-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99791,1,'2020-02-28 11:49:37','2020-02-28 09:49:37','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99784} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99784\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Self is the invariable abattoir where many relationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Just like the old adage goes, it takes two to tango. In any\ngiven relationship paradigm there are at least two entities (persons) involved. The relationship is a social real estate whose ecosystem is the sum total of the net contributions of the two persons involved. The relationship stands apart as an\nindependent entity which feeds on a diet radically different from that of its constituent persons, for it not just to thrive but to flourish. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are certain things that are otherwise optional and yet compulsory for a relationship to work. You mean like really “compulsory” when it’s a relationship of two consenting adults? Indeed! Communication, intimacy, trust, respect, love, submission etc constitute the mandatory diet the relationship cannot live without. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Relationships fail because people confuse their personal\nneeds and preferences for the needs of the relationship. Because of this grave\nmistake persons then tend to think that needs of their relationships (which in\nmany cases are confused for personal preferences and idiosyncrasies), are optional.\n</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the thing, maybe you don’t like to communicate,\nperhaps you don’t feel like intimacy, it could be that you have genuine trust\nissues, and maybe you struggle with respect, love, submission etc, however as\nfar as the survival and flourishing of your relationship is concerned these\naspects are neither optional nor negotiable.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3> Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It helps to understand and view the relationship as an\nentity separate from its persons just like it is with a business. Most of us\nunderstand that the moment you start running a business on personal preferences\nand whims at that very moment you have killed it. You may not like sales,&nbsp; or marketing management or even financial\nliteracy, etc however your enterprise needs these aspects to survive. As far as\nthe survival and growth of your business is concerned these aspects are not\nnegotiable. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their\nwhims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work.\nIf you are caught up in this rigmarole, what you are seeking to do is as futile\nas trying to lobby reality for custom settings. Adults caught up in this\npredicament are essentially adolescents trapped in big people’s bodies. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The shallow concept of mutual consent is another problem</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the standard grade appreciation of the basis of\nfunctional relationships: Mutual Consent!</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>However, there is a higher grade appreciation of the basis of not only functional but flourishing relationships:  Comprehensive Mutual Consent i.e. mutual consent on both the Yeses (Dos) and the Nos (Dont\'s)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>We tend to emphasize consensual Yeses (Dos) and neglect the\nconsensual nos (don’ts). For example, if your partner wants to spend time with\nyou, the default setting is to check if you are in the mood or if you would like to do that or not whereas a negotiated consensual, loving and mutual No will serve the relationship better than a self-conceived, monocratic and unilateral No. When confronted with a decision making process that has a hefty bearing on the relationship, the question to ask is not: do I want to do this or not? the appropriate question to ask is does the relationship need this or not? A balanced way forward should be negotiated in that premise. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Many people think it is only Dos or Yeses that must be consensual while the don’ts and Nos do not have to be agreed upon. This too is a grave mistake. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>You will surely win the argument but lose the relationship</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember the sharpness of your argument for, or against it is\ncompletely irrelevant if the needs of the significant other are trivialized. You\nwill surely win the argument but lose the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A good relationship is not a social contract in which you\nget what you want, it is a social contract where in you get what you want which\nserves the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Mental Hygiene on Why Relationships Fail','','inherit','closed','closed','','99783-revision-v1','','','2020-02-28 11:49:37','2020-02-28 09:49:37','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/99783-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99792,1,'2020-02-28 11:50:33','2020-02-28 09:50:33','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99784} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99784\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Self is the invariable abattoir where many relationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Just like the old adage goes, it takes two to tango. In any\ngiven relationship paradigm there are at least two entities (persons) involved. The relationship is a social real estate whose ecosystem is the sum total of the net contributions of the two persons involved. The relationship stands apart as an\nindependent entity which feeds on a diet radically different from that of its constituent persons, for it not just to thrive but to flourish. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are certain things that are otherwise optional and yet compulsory for a relationship to work. You mean like really “compulsory” when it’s a relationship of two consenting adults? Indeed! Communication, intimacy, trust, respect, love, submission etc constitute the mandatory diet the relationship cannot live without. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Relationships fail because people confuse their personal needs and preferences for the needs of the relationship. Because of this grave mistake, persons then tend to think that needs of their relationships (which in many cases are confused for personal preferences and idiosyncrasies), are optional. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the thing, maybe you don’t like to communicate,\nperhaps you don’t feel like intimacy, it could be that you have genuine trust\nissues, and maybe you struggle with respect, love, submission etc, however as\nfar as the survival and flourishing of your relationship is concerned these\naspects are neither optional nor negotiable.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3> Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It helps to understand and view the relationship as an\nentity separate from its persons just like it is with a business. Most of us\nunderstand that the moment you start running a business on personal preferences\nand whims at that very moment you have killed it. You may not like sales,&nbsp; or marketing management or even financial\nliteracy, etc however your enterprise needs these aspects to survive. As far as\nthe survival and growth of your business is concerned these aspects are not\nnegotiable. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their\nwhims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work.\nIf you are caught up in this rigmarole, what you are seeking to do is as futile\nas trying to lobby reality for custom settings. Adults caught up in this\npredicament are essentially adolescents trapped in big people’s bodies. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The shallow concept of mutual consent is another problem</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the standard grade appreciation of the basis of\nfunctional relationships: Mutual Consent!</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>However, there is a higher grade appreciation of the basis of not only functional but flourishing relationships:  Comprehensive Mutual Consent i.e. mutual consent on both the Yeses (Dos) and the Nos (Dont\'s)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>We tend to emphasize consensual Yeses (Dos) and neglect the\nconsensual nos (don’ts). For example, if your partner wants to spend time with\nyou, the default setting is to check if you are in the mood or if you would like to do that or not whereas a negotiated consensual, loving and mutual No will serve the relationship better than a self-conceived, monocratic and unilateral No. When confronted with a decision making process that has a hefty bearing on the relationship, the question to ask is not: do I want to do this or not? the appropriate question to ask is does the relationship need this or not? A balanced way forward should be negotiated in that premise. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Many people think it is only Dos or Yeses that must be consensual while the don’ts and Nos do not have to be agreed upon. This too is a grave mistake. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>You will surely win the argument but lose the relationship</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember the sharpness of your argument for, or against it is\ncompletely irrelevant if the needs of the significant other are trivialized. You\nwill surely win the argument but lose the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A good relationship is not a social contract in which you\nget what you want, it is a social contract where in you get what you want which\nserves the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Mental Hygiene on Why Relationships Fail','','inherit','closed','closed','','99783-revision-v1','','','2020-02-28 11:50:33','2020-02-28 09:50:33','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/99783-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99795,1,'2020-02-28 12:01:18','2020-02-28 10:01:18','','common-reasons-why-relationships-fail','','inherit','open','closed','','common-reasons-why-relationships-fail','','','2020-02-28 12:01:18','2020-02-28 10:01:18','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/common-reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg',0,'attachment','image/jpeg',0),(99796,1,'2020-02-28 12:02:52','2020-02-28 10:02:52','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99784} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99784\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Self is the invariable abattoir where many relationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Just like the old adage goes, it takes two to tango. In any\ngiven relationship paradigm there are at least two entities (persons) involved. The relationship is a social real estate whose ecosystem is the sum total of the net contributions of the two persons involved. The relationship stands apart as an\nindependent entity which feeds on a diet radically different from that of its constituent persons, for it not just to thrive but to flourish. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are certain things that are otherwise optional and yet compulsory for a relationship to work. You mean like really “compulsory” when it’s a relationship of two consenting adults? Indeed! Communication, intimacy, trust, respect, love, submission etc constitute the mandatory diet the relationship cannot live without. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Relationships fail because people confuse their personal needs and preferences for the needs of the relationship. Because of this grave mistake, persons then tend to think that needs of their relationships (which in many cases are confused for personal preferences and idiosyncrasies), are optional. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the thing, maybe you don’t like to communicate,\nperhaps you don’t feel like intimacy, it could be that you have genuine trust\nissues, and maybe you struggle with respect, love, submission etc, however as\nfar as the survival and flourishing of your relationship is concerned these\naspects are neither optional nor negotiable.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99795} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/common-reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99795\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3> Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It helps to understand and view the relationship as an entity separate from its persons just like it is with a business. Most of us understand that the moment you start running a business on personal preferences and whims at that very moment you have killed it. You may not like sales,  or marketing management or even financial literacy, etc however your enterprise needs these aspects to survive and grow. As far as the survival and growth of your business is concerned these aspects are not negotiable. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work. If you are caught up in this rigmarole, what you are seeking to do is as futile as trying to lobby reality for custom settings. Adults caught up in this predicament are essentially adolescents trapped in big people’s bodies. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The shallow concept of mutual consent is another problem</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the standard grade appreciation of the basis of\nfunctional relationships: Mutual Consent!</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>However, there is a higher grade appreciation of the basis of not only functional but flourishing relationships:  Comprehensive Mutual Consent i.e. mutual consent on both the Yeses (Dos) and the Nos (Don\'ts)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>We tend to emphasize consensual Yeses (Dos) and neglect the\nconsensual nos (don’ts). For example, if your partner wants to spend time with\nyou, usually the default setting is to check if you are in the mood or if you would like to do that or not, whereas a negotiated consensual, loving and mutual No will serve the relationship better than a self-conceived, monocratic and unilateral No. When confronted with a decision making process that has a hefty bearing on the relationship, the question to ask is not: \"Do I want to do this or not?\", the appropriate question to ask is, \"Does the relationship need this or not?\" A balanced way forward should be negotiated within that premise. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Many people think it is only Dos or Yeses that must be consensual while the don’ts and Nos do not have to be agreed upon. This too is a grave mistake. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>You will surely win the argument but lose the relationship</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember the sharpness of your argument for, or against it (whatever the initiative is) is completely irrelevant and lopsided if the needs of the significant other are trivialized. If you persists, you will surely win the argument but lose the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract where in you get what you want which serves the relationship. Failure to understand and live by this principle is the major reason why relationships fail. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Mental Hygiene on Why Relationships Fail','','inherit','closed','closed','','99783-revision-v1','','','2020-02-28 12:02:52','2020-02-28 10:02:52','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/99783-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99794,1,'2020-02-28 11:56:31','2020-02-28 09:56:31','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99784} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99784\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Self is the invariable abattoir where many relationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Just like the old adage goes, it takes two to tango. In any\ngiven relationship paradigm there are at least two entities (persons) involved. The relationship is a social real estate whose ecosystem is the sum total of the net contributions of the two persons involved. The relationship stands apart as an\nindependent entity which feeds on a diet radically different from that of its constituent persons, for it not just to thrive but to flourish. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are certain things that are otherwise optional and yet compulsory for a relationship to work. You mean like really “compulsory” when it’s a relationship of two consenting adults? Indeed! Communication, intimacy, trust, respect, love, submission etc constitute the mandatory diet the relationship cannot live without. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Relationships fail because people confuse their personal needs and preferences for the needs of the relationship. Because of this grave mistake, persons then tend to think that needs of their relationships (which in many cases are confused for personal preferences and idiosyncrasies), are optional. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the thing, maybe you don’t like to communicate,\nperhaps you don’t feel like intimacy, it could be that you have genuine trust\nissues, and maybe you struggle with respect, love, submission etc, however as\nfar as the survival and flourishing of your relationship is concerned these\naspects are neither optional nor negotiable.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3> Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It helps to understand and view the relationship as an entity separate from its persons just like it is with a business. Most of us understand that the moment you start running a business on personal preferences and whims at that very moment you have killed it. You may not like sales,  or marketing management or even financial literacy, etc however your enterprise needs these aspects to survive and grow. As far as the survival and growth of your business is concerned these aspects are not negotiable. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work. If you are caught up in this rigmarole, what you are seeking to do is as futile as trying to lobby reality for custom settings. Adults caught up in this predicament are essentially adolescents trapped in big people’s bodies. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The shallow concept of mutual consent is another problem</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the standard grade appreciation of the basis of\nfunctional relationships: Mutual Consent!</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>However, there is a higher grade appreciation of the basis of not only functional but flourishing relationships:  Comprehensive Mutual Consent i.e. mutual consent on both the Yeses (Dos) and the Nos (Don\'ts)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>We tend to emphasize consensual Yeses (Dos) and neglect the\nconsensual nos (don’ts). For example, if your partner wants to spend time with\nyou, usually the default setting is to check if you are in the mood or if you would like to do that or not, whereas a negotiated consensual, loving and mutual No will serve the relationship better than a self-conceived, monocratic and unilateral No. When confronted with a decision making process that has a hefty bearing on the relationship, the question to ask is not: \"Do I want to do this or not?\", the appropriate question to ask is, \"Does the relationship need this or not?\" A balanced way forward should be negotiated within that premise. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Many people think it is only Dos or Yeses that must be consensual while the don’ts and Nos do not have to be agreed upon. This too is a grave mistake. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>You will surely win the argument but lose the relationship</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember the sharpness of your argument for, or against it (whatever the initiative is) is completely irrelevant and lopsided if the needs of the significant other are trivialized. If you persists, you will surely win the argument but lose the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract where in you get what you want which serves the relationship. Failure to understand and live by this principle is the major reason why relationships fail. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Mental Hygiene on Why Relationships Fail','','inherit','closed','closed','','99783-revision-v1','','','2020-02-28 11:56:31','2020-02-28 09:56:31','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/99783-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99802,1,'2020-03-02 23:37:25','2020-03-02 21:37:25','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99784} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99784\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Self is the invariable abattoir where many relationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Just like the old adage goes, it takes two to tango. In any\ngiven relationship paradigm there are at least two entities (persons) involved. The relationship is a social real estate whose ecosystem is the sum total of the net contributions of the two persons involved. The relationship stands apart as an\nindependent entity which feeds on a diet radically different from that of its constituent persons, for it not just to thrive but to flourish. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are certain things that are otherwise optional and yet compulsory for a relationship to work. You mean like really “compulsory” when it’s a relationship of two consenting adults? Indeed! Communication, intimacy, trust, respect, love, submission etc constitute the mandatory diet the relationship cannot live without. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Relationships fail because people confuse their personal needs and preferences for the needs of the relationship. Because of this grave mistake, persons then tend to think that needs of their relationships (which in many cases are confused for personal preferences and idiosyncrasies), are optional. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the thing, maybe you don’t like to communicate,\nperhaps you don’t feel like intimacy, it could be that you have genuine trust\nissues, and maybe you struggle with respect, love, submission etc, however as\nfar as the survival and flourishing of your relationship is concerned these\naspects are neither optional nor negotiable.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99795} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/common-reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99795\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It helps to understand and view the relationship as an entity separate from its persons just like it is with a business. Most of us understand that the moment you start running a business on personal preferences and whims at that very moment you have killed it. You may not like sales,&nbsp; or marketing management or even financial literacy, etc however your enterprise needs these aspects to survive and grow. As far as the survival and growth of your business is concerned these aspects are not negotiable. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work. If you are caught up in this rigmarole, what you are seeking to do is as futile as trying to lobby reality for custom settings. Adults caught up in this predicament are essentially adolescents trapped in big people’s bodies. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The shallow concept of mutual consent is another problem</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the standard grade appreciation of the basis of functional relationships: Mutual Consent on initiatives or propositions. This simply refers to get in the buy in of your partner for what you seek to do or accomplish that involves the two of you.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>However, there is a higher grade appreciation of the basis of not only functional but flourishing relationships:  Comprehensive Mutual Consent i.e. mutual consent on both the axes of  propositioning as well as declining.  This refers to the other party seeking the buy in of the party making the proposition in their decline of the proposition. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>We tend to emphasize consent on one end of de-emphasize it on other. For example, if your partner wants to spend time with you, usually the default setting is to check if you are in the mood or if you would like to do that or not, whereas a negotiated consensual, loving and mutual No will serve the relationship better than a self-conceived, monocratic, unilateral  and a veto-powered \"No\". When confronted with a decision making process that has a hefty bearing on the relationship, the question to ask is not: \"Do I want to do this or not?\", the appropriate question to ask is, \"Does the relationship need this or not?\" A balanced way forward should be negotiated within that premise. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Many people tend to exercise veto power (unilateral decision making) in declining propositions or initiatives. This too is a grave mistake. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>You will surely win the argument but lose the relationship</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember the sharpness of your argument for, or against it (whatever the initiative is) is completely irrelevant and lopsided if the needs of the significant other are trivialized. If you persists, you will surely win the argument but lose the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract where in you get what you want which serves the relationship. Among other equally important factors, failure to understand and live by this principle is the major reason why relationships fail. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Mental Hygiene on Why Relationships Fail','','inherit','closed','closed','','99783-revision-v1','','','2020-03-02 23:37:25','2020-03-02 21:37:25','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/99783-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99805,1,'2020-03-03 00:10:14','2020-03-02 22:10:14','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99784} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99784\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3 style=\"text-align:justify!important;\">Self is the invariable abattoir where many relationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Just like the old adage goes, it takes two to tango. In any\ngiven relationship paradigm there are at least two entities (persons) involved. The relationship is a social real estate whose ecosystem is the sum total of the net contributions of the two persons involved. The relationship stands apart as an\nindependent entity which feeds on a diet radically different from that of its constituent persons, for it not just to thrive but to flourish. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are certain things that are otherwise optional and yet compulsory for a relationship to work. You mean like really “compulsory” when it’s a relationship of two consenting adults? Indeed! Communication, intimacy, trust, respect, love, submission etc constitute the mandatory diet the relationship cannot live without. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Relationships fail because people confuse their personal needs and preferences for the needs of the relationship. Because of this grave mistake, persons then tend to think that needs of their relationships (which in many cases are confused for personal preferences and idiosyncrasies), are optional. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the thing, maybe you don’t like to communicate, perhaps you don’t feel like investing in quality time with your partner, or it could be that you have genuine trust issues, and maybe you struggle with respect, love, submission etc, however as far as the survival and flourishing of your relationship is concerned these aspects are neither optional nor negotiable.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99795} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/common-reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99795\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It helps to understand and view the relationship as an entity separate from its persons just like it is with a business. Most of us understand that the moment you start running a business on personal preferences and whims at that very moment you have killed it. You may not like sales,  or marketing management or even financial literacy, etc, however your enterprise needs these aspects to survive and grow. As far as the survival and growth of your business is concerned these aspects are not negotiable. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work. If you are caught up in this rigmarole, what you are seeking to do is as futile as trying to lobby reality for custom settings. Adults caught up in this predicament are essentially adolescents trapped in big people’s bodies. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The shallow concept of mutual consent is another problem</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The issue of mutual consent in this context pertains to the essentials that keep the relationship growing and thriving and not anything untoward as it were. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the standard grade appreciation of the basis of functional relationships: Mutual Consent on initiatives or propositions. This simply refers to getting the buy-in of your partner for what you seek to do or accomplish with him/her. Quite straight forward this no rattles nor blisters here. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>However, there is a higher grade appreciation of the basis of not only functional but flourishing relationships:  Comprehensive Mutual Consent i.e. mutual consent on the both axes of propositioning as well as declining.  This refers to mutual consent being exercised on both ends of the communicative transaction. In other words, the one making an initiative seeks mutual consent of the other party and the target of the motion also seeks mutual consent in a case where the bid is declined. The fact is quite elusive to many.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>We tend to emphasize consent on one end and yet de-emphasize it on other. For example, if your partner wants to spend time or take a walk with you, usually the default setting is to check if you are in the mood or if you would like to do that or not, whereas a negotiated consensual, loving and mutual turn down will serve the relationship better than a self-conceived, monocratic, unilateral  and a veto-powered \"No\". When confronted with a decision making process that has a bearing on the relationship, the question to ask is not: \"Do I want to do this or not?\", the appropriate question to ask is, \"Does the relationship need this or not?\" A balanced way forward should be negotiated within that premise.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong> Many people tend to exercise veto power (unilateral decision making) in declining propositions or initiatives. This is the low hanging fruit of the insidious plague of self-centeredness. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>You will surely win the argument but lose the relationship</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember the sharpness of your argument for, or against it (whatever the initiative is) is completely irrelevant and lopsided if the needs of the significant other are trivialized. If you persists, you will surely win the argument but lose the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract where in you get what you want and do not get what you do not want in the context of mutual consent. A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract where you get what you want which serves the relationship. Among other equally important factors, failure to understand and live by this principle is the major reason why relationships fail. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Mental Hygiene on Why Relationships Fail','','inherit','closed','closed','','99783-revision-v1','','','2020-03-03 00:10:14','2020-03-02 22:10:14','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/99783-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99804,1,'2020-03-03 00:06:51','2020-03-02 22:06:51','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99784} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99784\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Self is the invariable abattoir where many relationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Just like the old adage goes, it takes two to tango. In any\ngiven relationship paradigm there are at least two entities (persons) involved. The relationship is a social real estate whose ecosystem is the sum total of the net contributions of the two persons involved. The relationship stands apart as an\nindependent entity which feeds on a diet radically different from that of its constituent persons, for it not just to thrive but to flourish. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are certain things that are otherwise optional and yet compulsory for a relationship to work. You mean like really “compulsory” when it’s a relationship of two consenting adults? Indeed! Communication, intimacy, trust, respect, love, submission etc constitute the mandatory diet the relationship cannot live without. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Relationships fail because people confuse their personal needs and preferences for the needs of the relationship. Because of this grave mistake, persons then tend to think that needs of their relationships (which in many cases are confused for personal preferences and idiosyncrasies), are optional. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the thing, maybe you don’t like to communicate, perhaps you don’t feel like investing in quality time with your partner, or it could be that you have genuine trust issues, and maybe you struggle with respect, love, submission etc, however as far as the survival and flourishing of your relationship is concerned these aspects are neither optional nor negotiable.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99795} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/common-reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99795\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It helps to understand and view the relationship as an entity separate from its persons just like it is with a business. Most of us understand that the moment you start running a business on personal preferences and whims at that very moment you have killed it. You may not like sales,  or marketing management or even financial literacy, etc, however your enterprise needs these aspects to survive and grow. As far as the survival and growth of your business is concerned these aspects are not negotiable. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work. If you are caught up in this rigmarole, what you are seeking to do is as futile as trying to lobby reality for custom settings. Adults caught up in this predicament are essentially adolescents trapped in big people’s bodies. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The shallow concept of mutual consent is another problem</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The issue of mutual consent in this context pertains to the essentials that keep the relationship growing and thriving and not anything untoward as it were. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the standard grade appreciation of the basis of functional relationships: Mutual Consent on initiatives or propositions. This simply refers to getting the buy-in of your partner for what you seek to do or accomplish with him/her. Quite straight forward this no rattles nor blisters here. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>However, there is a higher grade appreciation of the basis of not only functional but flourishing relationships:  Comprehensive Mutual Consent i.e. mutual consent on the both axes of propositioning as well as declining.  This refers to mutual consent being exercised on both ends of the communicative transaction. In other words, the one making an initiative seeks mutual consent of the other party and the target of the motion also seeks mutual consent in a case where the bid is declined. The fact is quite elusive to many.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>We tend to emphasize consent on one end and yet de-emphasize it on other. For example, if your partner wants to spend time or take a walk with you, usually the default setting is to check if you are in the mood or if you would like to do that or not, whereas a negotiated consensual, loving and mutual turn down will serve the relationship better than a self-conceived, monocratic, unilateral  and a veto-powered \"No\". When confronted with a decision making process that has a bearing on the relationship, the question to ask is not: \"Do I want to do this or not?\", the appropriate question to ask is, \"Does the relationship need this or not?\" A balanced way forward should be negotiated within that premise.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong> Many people tend to exercise veto power (unilateral decision making) in declining propositions or initiatives. This is the low hanging fruit of the insidious plague of self-centeredness. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>You will surely win the argument but lose the relationship</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember the sharpness of your argument for, or against it (whatever the initiative is) is completely irrelevant and lopsided if the needs of the significant other are trivialized. If you persists, you will surely win the argument but lose the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract where in you get what you want and do not get what you do not want in the context of mutual consent. A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract where you get what you want which serves the relationship. Among other equally important factors, failure to understand and live by this principle is the major reason why relationships fail. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Mental Hygiene on Why Relationships Fail','','inherit','closed','closed','','99783-revision-v1','','','2020-03-03 00:06:51','2020-03-02 22:06:51','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/99783-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99808,1,'2020-03-03 00:19:52','2020-03-02 22:19:52','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99784} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99784\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3 style=\"text-align:justify!important;\">Self is the invariable abattoir where many relationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Just like the old adage goes, it takes two to tango. In any\ngiven relationship paradigm there are at least two entities (persons) involved. The relationship is a social real estate whose ecosystem is the sum total of the net contributions of the two persons involved. The relationship stands apart as an\nindependent entity which feeds on a diet radically different from that of its constituent persons, for it not just to thrive but to flourish. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are certain things that are otherwise optional and yet compulsory for a relationship to work. You mean like really “compulsory” when it’s a relationship of two consenting adults? Indeed! Communication, intimacy, trust, respect, love, submission etc constitute the mandatory diet the relationship cannot live without. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Relationships fail because people confuse their personal needs and preferences for the needs of the relationship. Because of this grave mistake, persons then tend to think that needs of their relationships (which in many cases are confused for personal preferences and idiosyncrasies), are optional. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the thing, maybe you don’t like to communicate, perhaps you don’t feel like investing in quality time with your partner, or it could be that you have genuine trust issues, and maybe you struggle with respect, love, submission etc, however as far as the survival and flourishing of your relationship is concerned these aspects are neither optional nor negotiable.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99795} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/common-reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99795\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It helps to understand and view the relationship as an entity separate from its persons just like it is with a business concept. Most of us understand that the moment you start running a business on personal preferences and whims at that very moment you have killed it. You may not like sales,  or marketing management or even financial literacy, etc, however your enterprise needs a diligent praxis of these disciplines to survive and grow. As far as the survival and growth of your business is concerned these aspects are not negotiable. If you can\'t appreciate that then do not run a business.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work. If you are caught up in this rigmarole, what you are seeking to do is as futile as trying to lobby reality for custom settings. Adults caught up in this predicament are essentially adolescents trapped in big people’s bodies. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The shallow concept of mutual consent is another problem</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The issue of mutual consent in this context pertains to the essentials that keep the relationship growing and thriving and not anything untoward as it were. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the standard grade appreciation of the basis of functional relationships: Mutual Consent on initiatives or propositions. This simply refers to getting the buy-in of your partner for whatever you seek to do or accomplish with him/her. Quite straight forward this, no rattles nor blisters here. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>However, there is a higher grade appreciation of the basis of not only functional but flourishing relationships:  Comprehensive Mutual Consent i.e. mutual consent on the both axes of propositioning as well as declining.  This refers to mutual consent being exercised on both ends of the communicative transaction. In other words, the one making an initiative seeks mutual consent of the other party and the target of the motion also seeks mutual consent in a case where the bid is declined. The fact is understandably quite elusive to many.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>We tend to emphasize consent on one end and yet de-emphasize it on other. For example, if your partner wants to spend time or take a walk with you, usually the default setting is to check if you are in the mood or if you would like to do that or not, whereas a negotiated consensual, loving and mutual turn down will serve the relationship better than a self-conceived, monocratic, unilateral  and a veto-powered \"No\". When confronted with a decision making process that has a bearing on the relationship, the question to ask is not: \"Do I want to do this or not?\", the appropriate question to ask is, \"Does the relationship need this or not?\" A balanced way forward should be negotiated within that premise.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong> Many people tend to exercise veto power (unilateral decision making) in declining propositions or initiatives. This is the low hanging fruit of the insidious plague of self-centeredness. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>You will surely win the argument but lose the relationship</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember the sharpness of your argument for, or against it (whatever the initiative is) is completely irrelevant and lopsided if the needs of the significant other are trivialized. If you persists, you will surely win the argument but lose the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract where in you get what you want and do not get what you do not want in the context of comprehensive mutual consent. A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract where you get what you want which serves the relationship. Among many other equally important factors, failure to understand and live by this principle is the major reason why relationships fail. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Mental Hygiene on Why Relationships Fail','','inherit','closed','closed','','99783-revision-v1','','','2020-03-03 00:19:52','2020-03-02 22:19:52','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/99783-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99807,1,'2020-03-03 00:19:23','2020-03-02 22:19:23','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99784} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99784\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3 style=\"text-align:justify!important;\">Self is the invariable abattoir where many relationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Just like the old adage goes, it takes two to tango. In any\ngiven relationship paradigm there are at least two entities (persons) involved. The relationship is a social real estate whose ecosystem is the sum total of the net contributions of the two persons involved. The relationship stands apart as an\nindependent entity which feeds on a diet radically different from that of its constituent persons, for it not just to thrive but to flourish. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are certain things that are otherwise optional and yet compulsory for a relationship to work. You mean like really “compulsory” when it’s a relationship of two consenting adults? Indeed! Communication, intimacy, trust, respect, love, submission etc constitute the mandatory diet the relationship cannot live without. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Relationships fail because people confuse their personal needs and preferences for the needs of the relationship. Because of this grave mistake, persons then tend to think that needs of their relationships (which in many cases are confused for personal preferences and idiosyncrasies), are optional. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the thing, maybe you don’t like to communicate, perhaps you don’t feel like investing in quality time with your partner, or it could be that you have genuine trust issues, and maybe you struggle with respect, love, submission etc, however as far as the survival and flourishing of your relationship is concerned these aspects are neither optional nor negotiable.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99795} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/common-reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99795\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It helps to understand and view the relationship as an entity separate from its persons just like it is with a business concept. Most of us understand that the moment you start running a business on personal preferences and whims at that very moment you have killed it. You may not like sales,  or marketing management or even financial literacy, etc, however your enterprise needs a diligent praxis of these disciplines to survive and grow. As far as the survival and growth of your business is concerned these aspects are not negotiable. If you can\'t appreciate that then do not run a business.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work. If you are caught up in this rigmarole, what you are seeking to do is as futile as trying to lobby reality for custom settings. Adults caught up in this predicament are essentially adolescents trapped in big people’s bodies. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The shallow concept of mutual consent is another problem</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The issue of mutual consent in this context pertains to the essentials that keep the relationship growing and thriving and not anything untoward as it were. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the standard grade appreciation of the basis of functional relationships: Mutual Consent on initiatives or propositions. This simply refers to getting the buy-in of your partner for whatever you seek to do or accomplish with him/her. Quite straight forward this, no rattles nor blisters here. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>However, there is a higher grade appreciation of the basis of not only functional but flourishing relationships:  Comprehensive Mutual Consent i.e. mutual consent on the both axes of propositioning as well as declining.  This refers to mutual consent being exercised on both ends of the communicative transaction. In other words, the one making an initiative seeks mutual consent of the other party and the target of the motion also seeks mutual consent in a case where the bid is declined. The fact is understandably quite elusive to many.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>We tend to emphasize consent on one end and yet de-emphasize it on other. For example, if your partner wants to spend time or take a walk with you, usually the default setting is to check if you are in the mood or if you would like to do that or not, whereas a negotiated consensual, loving and mutual turn down will serve the relationship better than a self-conceived, monocratic, unilateral  and a veto-powered \"No\". When confronted with a decision making process that has a bearing on the relationship, the question to ask is not: \"Do I want to do this or not?\", the appropriate question to ask is, \"Does the relationship need this or not?\" A balanced way forward should be negotiated within that premise.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong> Many people tend to exercise veto power (unilateral decision making) in declining propositions or initiatives. This is the low hanging fruit of the insidious plague of self-centeredness. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>You will surely win the argument but lose the relationship</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember the sharpness of your argument for, or against it (whatever the initiative is) is completely irrelevant and lopsided if the needs of the significant other are trivialized. If you persists, you will surely win the argument but lose the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract where in you get what you want and do not get what you do not want in the context of comprehensive mutual consent. A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract where you get what you want which serves the relationship. Among other equally important factors, failure to understand and live by this principle is the major reason why relationships fail. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Mental Hygiene on Why Relationships Fail','','inherit','closed','closed','','99783-revision-v1','','','2020-03-03 00:19:23','2020-03-02 22:19:23','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/99783-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99809,1,'2020-03-03 09:49:59','2020-03-03 07:49:59','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99784} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99784\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3 style=\"text-align:justify!important;\">Self is the invariable abattoir where many relationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Just like the old adage goes, it takes two to tango. In any\ngiven relationship paradigm there are at least two entities (persons) involved. The relationship is a social real estate whose ecosystem is the sum total of the net contributions of the two persons involved. The relationship stands apart as an\nindependent entity which feeds on a diet radically different from that of its constituent persons, for it not just to thrive but to flourish. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are certain things that are otherwise optional and yet compulsory for a relationship to work. You mean like really “compulsory” when it’s a relationship of two consenting adults? Indeed! Communication, intimacy, trust, respect, love, submission etc constitute the mandatory diet the relationship cannot live without. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Relationships fail because people confuse their personal needs and preferences for the needs of the relationship. Because of this grave mistake, persons then tend to think that needs of their relationships (which in many cases are confused for personal preferences and idiosyncrasies), are optional. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the thing, maybe you don’t like to communicate, perhaps you don’t feel like investing in quality time with your partner, or it could be that you have genuine trust issues, and maybe you struggle with respect, love, submission etc, however as far as the survival and flourishing of your relationship is concerned these aspects are neither optional nor negotiable.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99795} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/common-reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99795\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It helps to understand and view the relationship as an entity separate from its persons just like it is with a business concept. Most of us understand that the moment you start running a business on personal preferences and whims at that very moment you have killed it. You may not like sales,&nbsp; or marketing management or even financial literacy, etc, however your enterprise needs a diligent praxis of these disciplines to survive and grow. As far as the survival and growth of your business is concerned these aspects are not negotiable. If you can\'t appreciate that then do not run a business.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work. If you are caught up in this rigmarole, what you are seeking to do is as futile as trying to lobby reality for custom settings. Adults caught up in this predicament are essentially adolescents trapped in big people’s bodies. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The shallow concept of mutual consent is another problem</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The issue of mutual consent in this context pertains to the essentials that keep the relationship growing and thriving and not anything untoward as it were. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the standard grade appreciation of the basis of functional relationships: Mutual Consent on initiatives or propositions. This simply refers to getting the buy-in of your partner for whatever you seek to do or accomplish with him/her. Quite straight forward this, no rattles nor blisters here. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>However, there is a higher grade appreciation of the basis of not only functional but flourishing relationships:&nbsp; Comprehensive Mutual Consent i.e. mutual consent on the both axes of propositioning as well as declining.  This refers to mutual consent being exercised on both ends of the communicative transaction. In other words, the one making an initiative seeks mutual consent of the other party and the target of the motion also seeks mutual consent in a case where the bid is declined. The fact is understandably quite elusive to many.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>We tend to emphasize consent on one end and yet de-emphasize it on other. For example, if your partner wants to spend time or take a walk with you, usually the default setting is to check if you are in the mood or if you would like to do that or not, whereas a negotiated consensual, loving and mutual turn down will serve the relationship better than a self-conceived, monocratic, unilateral  and a veto-powered \"No\". When confronted with a decision making process that has a bearing on the relationship, the question to ask is not: \"Do I want to do this or not?\", the appropriate question to ask is, \"Does the relationship need this or not?\" A balanced way forward should be negotiated within that premise.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong> Many people tend to exercise veto power (unilateral decision making) in declining propositions or initiatives. This is the low hanging fruit of the insidious plague of self-centeredness. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>You will surely win the argument but lose the relationship</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember the sharpness of your argument for, or against it (whatever the initiative is) is completely irrelevant and lopsided if the needs of the significant other are trivialized. If you persist, you will surely win the argument but lose the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract where in you get what you want and do not get what you do not want in the context of comprehensive mutual consent. A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract where you get what you want which serves the relationship. Among many other equally important factors, failure to understand and live by this principle is the major reason why relationships fail. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Mental Hygiene on Why Relationships Fail','','inherit','closed','closed','','99783-revision-v1','','','2020-03-03 09:49:59','2020-03-03 07:49:59','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/99783-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99811,1,'2020-03-03 09:52:19','2020-03-03 07:52:19','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99784} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99784\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3 style=\"text-align:justify!important;\">Self is the invariable abattoir where many relationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Just like the old adage goes, it takes two to tango. In any given relationship paradigm there are at least two entities (persons) involved. The relationship is a social real estate whose ecosystem is the sum total of the net contributions of the two persons involved. The relationship stands apart as an independent entity which feeds on a diet radically different from that of its constituent persons, for it not just to survive but to flourish. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are certain things that are otherwise optional and yet compulsory for a relationship to work. You mean like really “compulsory” when it’s a relationship of two consenting adults? Indeed! Communication, intimacy, trust, respect, love, submission etc constitute the mandatory diet the relationship cannot live without. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Relationships fail because people confuse their personal needs and preferences for the needs of the relationship. Because of this grave mistake, persons then tend to think that needs of their relationships (which in many cases are confused for personal preferences and idiosyncrasies), are optional. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the thing, maybe you don’t like to communicate, perhaps you don’t feel like investing in quality time with your partner, or it could be that you have genuine trust issues, and maybe you struggle with respect, love, submission etc, however as far as the survival and flourishing of your relationship is concerned these aspects are neither optional nor negotiable.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99795} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/common-reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99795\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It helps to understand and view the relationship as an entity separate from its persons just like it is with a business concept. Most of us understand that the moment you start running a business on personal preferences and whims at that very moment you have killed it. You may not like sales,&nbsp; or marketing management or even financial literacy, etc, however your enterprise needs a diligent praxis of these disciplines to survive and grow. As far as the survival and growth of your business is concerned these aspects are not negotiable. If you can\'t appreciate that then do not run a business.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work. If you are caught up in this rigmarole, what you are seeking to do is as futile as trying to lobby reality for custom settings. Adults caught up in this predicament are essentially adolescents trapped in big people’s bodies. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The shallow concept of mutual consent is another problem</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The issue of mutual consent in this context pertains to the essentials that keep the relationship growing and thriving and not anything untoward as it were. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the standard grade appreciation of the basis of functional relationships: Mutual Consent on initiatives or propositions. This simply refers to getting the buy-in of your partner for whatever you seek to do or accomplish with him/her. Quite straight forward this, no rattles nor blisters here. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>However, there is a higher grade appreciation of the basis of not only functional but flourishing relationships:&nbsp; Comprehensive Mutual Consent i.e. mutual consent on the both axes of propositioning as well as declining.  This refers to mutual consent being exercised on both ends of the communicative transaction. In other words, the one making an initiative seeks mutual consent of the other party and the target of the motion also seeks mutual consent in a case where the bid is declined. The fact is understandably quite elusive to many.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>We tend to emphasize consent on one end and yet de-emphasize it on other. For example, if your partner wants to spend time or take a walk with you, usually the default setting is to check if you are in the mood or if you would like to do that or not, whereas a negotiated consensual, loving and mutual turn down will serve the relationship better than a self-conceived, monocratic, unilateral  and a veto-powered \"No\". When confronted with a decision making process that has a bearing on the relationship, the question to ask is not: \"Do I want to do this or not?\", the appropriate question to ask is, \"Does the relationship need this or not?\" A balanced way forward should be negotiated within that premise.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong> Many people tend to exercise veto power (unilateral decision making) in declining propositions or initiatives. This is the low hanging fruit of the insidious plague of self-centeredness. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>You will surely win the argument but lose the relationship</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember the sharpness of your argument for, or against it (whatever the initiative is) is completely irrelevant and lopsided if the needs of the significant other are trivialized. If you persist, you will surely win the argument but lose the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract where in you get what you want and do not get what you do not want in the context of comprehensive mutual consent. A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract where you get what you want which serves the relationship. Among many other equally important factors, failure to understand and live by the principle of comprehensive mutual consent is the major reason why relationships fail. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Mental Hygiene on Why Relationships Fail','','inherit','closed','closed','','99783-revision-v1','','','2020-03-03 09:52:19','2020-03-03 07:52:19','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/99783-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99815,1,'2020-03-06 12:58:44','2020-03-06 10:58:44','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99784} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99784\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3 style=\"text-align:justify!important;\">Self is the invariable abattoir where many relationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Just like the old adage goes, it takes two to tango. In any given relationship paradigm there are at least two entities (persons) involved. A relationship is a social real estate whose ecosystem is the sum total of the net contributions of the two persons involved. The relationship stands apart as an independent entity which feeds on a diet radically different from that of its constituent persons, for it not just to survive but to flourish. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are certain things that are otherwise optional and yet compulsory for a relationship to work. You mean like really “compulsory” when it’s a relationship of two consenting adults? Indeed! Communication, intimacy, trust, respect, love, submission etc constitute the mandatory diet the relationship cannot live without. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Relationships fail because people confuse their personal needs and preferences for the needs of the relationship. Because of this grave mistake, persons then tend to think that needs of their relationships (which in many cases are confused for personal preferences and idiosyncrasies), are optional. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the thing, maybe you don’t like to communicate, perhaps you don’t feel like investing in quality time with your partner, or it could be that you have genuine trust issues, and maybe you struggle with respect, love, submission etc, however as far as the survival and flourishing of your relationship is concerned these aspects are neither optional nor negotiable.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99795} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/common-reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99795\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It helps to understand and view the relationship as an entity separate from its persons just like it is with a business concept. Most of us understand that the moment you start running a business on personal preferences and whims at that very moment you have killed it. You may not like sales,&nbsp; or marketing management or even financial literacy, etc, however your enterprise needs a diligent praxis of these disciplines to survive and grow. As far as the survival and growth of your business is concerned these aspects are not negotiable. If you can\'t appreciate that then do not run a business.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work. If you are caught up in this rigmarole, what you are seeking to do is as futile as trying to lobby reality for custom settings. Adults caught up in this predicament are essentially adolescents trapped in big people’s bodies. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The shallow concept of mutual consent is another problem</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The issue of mutual consent in this context pertains to the essentials that keep the relationship growing and thriving and not anything untoward as it were. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the standard grade appreciation of the basis of functional relationships: Mutual Consent on initiatives or propositions. This simply refers to getting the buy-in of your partner for whatever you seek to do or accomplish with him/her. Quite straight forward this, no rattles nor blisters here. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>However, there is a higher grade appreciation of the basis of not only functional but flourishing relationships:&nbsp; Comprehensive Mutual Consent i.e. mutual consent on the both axes of propositioning as well as declining.  This refers to mutual consent being exercised on both ends of the communicative transaction. In other words, the one making an initiative seeks mutual consent of the other party and the target of the motion also seeks mutual consent in a case where the bid is declined. The fact is understandably quite elusive to many.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>We tend to emphasize consent on one end and yet de-emphasize it on the other. For example, if your partner wants to spend time or take a walk with you, usually the default setting is to check if you are in the mood or if you would like to do that or not, whereas a negotiated consensual, loving and mutual turn down will serve the relationship better than a self-conceived, monocratic, unilateral  and a veto-powered \"No\". When confronted with a decision making process that has a bearing on the relationship, the question to ask is not: \"Do I want to do this or not?\", the appropriate question to ask is, \"Does the relationship need this or not?\" A balanced way forward should be negotiated within that premise.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong> Many people tend to exercise veto power (unilateral decision making) in declining propositions or initiatives. This is the low hanging fruit of the insidious plague of self-centeredness. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>You will surely win the argument but lose the relationship</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember the sharpness of your argument for, or against it (whatever the initiative is) is completely irrelevant and lopsided if the needs of the significant other are trivialized. If you persist, you will surely win the argument but lose the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract where in you get what you want and do not get what you do not want in the context of comprehensive mutual consent. A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract where you get what you want which serves the relationship. Among many other equally important factors, failure to understand and live by the principle of comprehensive mutual consent is the major reason why relationships fail. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Mental Hygiene on Why Relationships Fail','','inherit','closed','closed','','99783-revision-v1','','','2020-03-06 12:58:44','2020-03-06 10:58:44','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/99783-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99816,1,'2020-03-06 13:00:50','2020-03-06 11:00:50','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99784} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99784\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3 style=\"text-align:justify!important;\">Self is the invariable abattoir where many relationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Just like the old adage goes, it takes two to tango. In any given relationship paradigm there are at least two entities (persons) involved. A relationship is a social real estate whose ecosystem is the sum total of the net contributions of the two persons involved. The relationship stands apart as an independent entity which feeds on a diet radically different from that of its constituent persons, for it not just to survive but to flourish. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are certain things that are otherwise optional and yet compulsory for a relationship to work. You mean like really “compulsory” when it’s a relationship of two consenting adults? Indeed! Communication, intimacy, trust, respect, love, submission etc constitute the mandatory diet the relationship cannot live without. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Relationships fail because people confuse their personal needs and preferences for the needs of the relationship. Because of this grave mistake, persons then tend to think that needs of their relationships (which in many cases are confused for personal preferences and idiosyncrasies), are optional. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the thing, maybe you don’t like to communicate, perhaps you don’t feel like investing in quality time with your partner, or it could be that you have genuine trust issues, and maybe you struggle with respect, love, submission etc, however as far as the survival and flourishing of your relationship is concerned these aspects are neither optional nor negotiable.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99795} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/common-reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99795\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It helps to understand and view the relationship as an entity separate from its persons just like it is with a business concept. Most of us understand that the moment you start running a business on personal preferences and whims at that very moment you have killed it. You may not like sales,&nbsp; or marketing management or even financial literacy, etc, however your enterprise needs a diligent praxis of these disciplines to survive and grow. As far as the survival and growth of your business is concerned these aspects are not negotiable. If you can\'t appreciate that then do not run a business.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work. If you are caught up in this rigmarole, what you are seeking to do is as futile as trying to lobby reality for custom settings. Adults caught up in this predicament are essentially adolescents trapped in big people’s bodies. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The shallow concept of mutual consent is another problem</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The issue of mutual consent in this context pertains to the essentials that keep the relationship growing and thriving and not anything untoward as it were. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the standard grade appreciation of the basis of functional relationships: Mutual Consent on initiatives or propositions. This simply refers to getting the buy-in of your partner for whatever you seek to do or accomplish with him/her. Quite straight forward this, no rattles nor blisters here. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>However, there is a higher grade appreciation of the basis of not only functional but flourishing relationships:&nbsp; Comprehensive Mutual Consent i.e. mutual consent on the both axes of propositioning as well as declining.  This refers to mutual consent being exercised on both ends of the communicative transaction. In other words, the one making an initiative seeks mutual consent of the other party and the target of the motion also seeks mutual consent in a case where the bid is declined. The fact is understandably quite elusive to many.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>We tend to emphasize consent on one end and yet de-emphasize it on the other. For example, if your partner wants to spend time or take a walk with you, usually the default setting is to check if you are in the mood or if you would like to do that or not, and if you don\'t feel like you just dispense a reflex,  knee-jerk and poorly thought out \"No!\",  whereas a negotiated consensual, loving and mutual turn down will serve the relationship better than a self-conceived, monocratic, unilateral  and a veto-powered decline. When confronted with a decision making process that has a bearing on the relationship, the question to ask is not: \"Do I want to do this or not?\", the appropriate question to ask is, \"Does the relationship need this or not?\" A balanced way forward should be negotiated within that premise.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong> Many people tend to exercise veto power (unilateral decision making) in declining propositions or initiatives. This is the low hanging fruit of the insidious plague of self-centeredness. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>You will surely win the argument but lose the relationship</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember the sharpness of your argument for, or against it (whatever the initiative is) is completely irrelevant and lopsided if the needs of the significant other are trivialized. If you persist, you will surely win the argument but lose the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract where in you get what you want and do not get what you do not want in the context of comprehensive mutual consent. A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract where you get what you want which serves the relationship. Among many other equally important factors, failure to understand and live by the principle of comprehensive mutual consent is the major reason why relationships fail. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Mental Hygiene on Why Relationships Fail','','inherit','closed','closed','','99783-revision-v1','','','2020-03-06 13:00:50','2020-03-06 11:00:50','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/99783-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99817,1,'2020-03-06 13:02:32','2020-03-06 11:02:32','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99784} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99784\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3 style=\"text-align:justify!important;\">Self is the invariable abattoir where many relationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Just like the old adage goes, it takes two to tango. In any given relationship paradigm there are at least two entities (persons) involved. A relationship is a social real estate whose ecosystem is the sum total of the net contributions of the two persons involved. The relationship stands apart as an independent entity which feeds on a diet radically different from that of its constituent persons, for it not just to survive but to flourish. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are certain things that are otherwise optional and yet compulsory for a relationship to work. You mean like really “compulsory” when it’s a relationship of two consenting adults? Indeed! Communication, intimacy, trust, respect, love, submission etc constitute the mandatory diet the relationship cannot live without. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Relationships fail because people confuse their personal needs and preferences for the needs of the relationship. Because of this grave mistake, persons then tend to think that needs of their relationships (which in many cases are confused for personal preferences and idiosyncrasies), are optional. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the thing, maybe you don’t like to communicate, perhaps you don’t feel like investing in quality time with your partner, or it could be that you have genuine trust issues, and maybe you struggle with respect, love, submission etc, however as far as the survival and flourishing of your relationship is concerned these aspects are neither optional nor negotiable.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99795} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/common-reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99795\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It helps to understand and view the relationship as an entity separate from its persons just like it is with a business concept. Most of us understand that the moment you start running a business on personal preferences and whims at that very moment you have killed it. You may not like sales,&nbsp; or marketing management or even financial literacy, etc, however your enterprise needs a diligent praxis of these disciplines to survive and grow. As far as the survival and growth of your business is concerned these aspects are not negotiable. If you can\'t appreciate that then do not run a business.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work. If you are caught up in this rigmarole, what you are seeking to do is as futile as trying to lobby reality for custom settings. Adults caught up in this predicament are essentially adolescents trapped in big people’s bodies. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The shallow concept of mutual consent is another problem</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The issue of mutual consent in this context pertains to the essentials that keep the relationship growing and thriving and not anything untoward as it were. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the standard grade appreciation of the basis of functional relationships: Mutual Consent on initiatives or propositions. This simply refers to getting the buy-in of your partner for whatever you seek to do or accomplish with him/her. Quite straight forward this, no rattles nor blisters here. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>However, there is a higher grade appreciation of the basis of not only functional but flourishing relationships:&nbsp; Comprehensive Mutual Consent i.e. mutual consent on the both axes of propositioning as well as declining.  This refers to mutual consent being exercised on both ends of the communicative transaction. In other words, the one making an initiative seeks mutual consent of the other party and the target of the motion also seeks mutual consent in a case where the bid is declined. The fact is understandably quite elusive to many.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>We tend to emphasize consent on one end and yet de-emphasize it on the other. For example, if your partner wants to spend time or take a walk with you, usually the default setting is to check if you are in the mood or if you would like to do that or not, and if you don\'t feel like it you simply dispense a reflex,  knee-jerk and poorly thought-out unilateral \"No!\",  whereas a negotiated consensual, loving and mutual turn down will serve the relationship better than a self-conceived, monocratic and veto-powered decline. When confronted with a decision making process that has a bearing on the relationship, the question to ask is not: \"Do I want to do this or not?\", the appropriate question to ask is, \"Does the relationship need this or not?\" A balanced way forward should be negotiated within that premise.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong> Many people tend to exercise veto power (unilateral decision making) in declining propositions or initiatives. This is the low hanging fruit of the insidious plague of self-centeredness. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>You will surely win the argument but lose the relationship</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember the sharpness of your argument for, or against it (whatever the initiative is) is completely irrelevant and lopsided if the needs of the significant other are trivialized. If you persist, you will surely win the argument but lose the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract where in you get what you want and do not get what you do not want in the context of comprehensive mutual consent. A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract where you get what you want which serves the relationship. Among many other equally important factors, failure to understand and live by the principle of comprehensive mutual consent is the major reason why relationships fail. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Mental Hygiene on Why Relationships Fail','','inherit','closed','closed','','99783-revision-v1','','','2020-03-06 13:02:32','2020-03-06 11:02:32','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/99783-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99818,1,'2020-03-06 13:02:53','2020-03-06 11:02:53','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99784} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99784\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3 style=\"text-align:justify!important;\">Self is the invariable abattoir where many relationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Just like the old adage goes, it takes two to tango. In any given relationship paradigm there are at least two entities (persons) involved. A relationship is a social real estate whose ecosystem is the sum total of the net contributions of the two persons involved. The relationship stands apart as an independent entity which feeds on a diet radically different from that of its constituent persons, for it not just to survive but to flourish. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are certain things that are otherwise optional and yet compulsory for a relationship to work. You mean like really “compulsory” when it’s a relationship of two consenting adults? Indeed! Communication, intimacy, trust, respect, love, submission etc constitute the mandatory diet the relationship cannot live without. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Relationships fail because people confuse their personal needs and preferences for the needs of the relationship. Because of this grave mistake, persons then tend to think that needs of their relationships (which in many cases are confused for personal preferences and idiosyncrasies), are optional. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the thing, maybe you don’t like to communicate, perhaps you don’t feel like investing in quality time with your partner, or it could be that you have genuine trust issues, and maybe you struggle with respect, love, submission etc, however as far as the survival and flourishing of your relationship is concerned these aspects are neither optional nor negotiable.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99795} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/common-reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99795\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It helps to understand and view the relationship as an entity separate from its persons just like it is with a business concept. Most of us understand that the moment you start running a business on personal preferences and whims at that very moment you have killed it. You may not like sales,&nbsp; or marketing management or even financial literacy, etc, however your enterprise needs a diligent praxis of these disciplines to survive and grow. As far as the survival and growth of your business is concerned these aspects are not negotiable. If you can\'t appreciate that then do not run a business.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work. If you are caught up in this rigmarole, what you are seeking to do is as futile as trying to lobby reality for custom settings. Adults caught up in this predicament are essentially adolescents trapped in big people’s bodies. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The shallow concept of mutual consent is another problem</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The issue of mutual consent in this context pertains to the essentials that keep the relationship growing and thriving and not anything untoward as it were. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the standard grade appreciation of the basis of functional relationships: Mutual Consent on initiatives or propositions. This simply refers to getting the buy-in of your partner for whatever you seek to do or accomplish with him/her. Quite straight forward this, no rattles nor blisters here. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>However, there is a higher grade appreciation of the basis of not only functional but flourishing relationships:&nbsp; Comprehensive Mutual Consent i.e. mutual consent on the both axes of propositioning as well as declining.  This refers to mutual consent being exercised on both ends of the communicative transaction. In other words, the one making an initiative seeks mutual consent of the other party and the target of the motion also seeks mutual consent in a case where the bid is declined. The fact is understandably quite elusive to many.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>We tend to emphasize consent on one end and yet de-emphasize it on the other. For example, if your partner wants to spend time or take a walk with you, usually the default setting is to check if you are in the mood or if you would like to do that or not, and if you don\'t feel like it you simply dispense a reflex,  knee-jerk and poorly thought-out unilateral \"No!\",  whereas a well negotiated consensual, loving and mutual turn down will serve the relationship better than a self-conceived, monocratic and veto-powered decline. When confronted with a decision making process that has a bearing on the relationship, the question to ask is not: \"Do I want to do this or not?\", the appropriate question to ask is, \"Does the relationship need this or not?\" A balanced way forward should be negotiated within that premise.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong> Many people tend to exercise veto power (unilateral decision making) in declining propositions or initiatives. This is the low hanging fruit of the insidious plague of self-centeredness. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>You will surely win the argument but lose the relationship</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember the sharpness of your argument for, or against it (whatever the initiative is) is completely irrelevant and lopsided if the needs of the significant other are trivialized. If you persist, you will surely win the argument but lose the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract where in you get what you want and do not get what you do not want in the context of comprehensive mutual consent. A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract where you get what you want which serves the relationship. Among many other equally important factors, failure to understand and live by the principle of comprehensive mutual consent is the major reason why relationships fail. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Mental Hygiene on Why Relationships Fail','','inherit','closed','closed','','99783-revision-v1','','','2020-03-06 13:02:53','2020-03-06 11:02:53','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/99783-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99819,1,'2020-03-06 13:03:59','2020-03-06 11:03:59','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99784} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99784\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3 style=\"text-align:justify!important;\">Self is the invariable abattoir where many relationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Just like the old adage goes, it takes two to tango. In any given relationship paradigm there are at least two entities (persons) involved. A relationship is a social real estate whose ecosystem is the sum total of the net contributions of the two persons involved. The relationship stands apart as an independent entity which feeds on a diet radically different from that of its constituent persons, for it not just to survive but to flourish. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are certain things that are otherwise optional and yet compulsory for a relationship to work. You mean like really “compulsory” when it’s a relationship of two consenting adults? Indeed! Communication, intimacy, trust, respect, love, submission etc constitute the mandatory diet the relationship cannot live without. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Relationships fail because people confuse their personal needs and preferences for the needs of the relationship. Because of this grave mistake, persons then tend to think that needs of their relationships (which in many cases are confused for personal preferences and idiosyncrasies), are optional. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the thing, maybe you don’t like to communicate, perhaps you don’t feel like investing in quality time with your partner, or it could be that you have genuine trust issues, and maybe you struggle with respect, love, submission etc, however as far as the survival and flourishing of your relationship is concerned these aspects are neither optional nor negotiable.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99795} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/common-reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99795\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It helps to understand and view the relationship as an entity separate from its persons just like it is with a business concept. Most of us understand that the moment you start running a business on personal preferences and whims at that very moment you have killed it. You may not like sales,&nbsp; or marketing management or even financial literacy, etc, however your enterprise needs a diligent praxis of these disciplines to survive and grow. As far as the survival and growth of your business is concerned these aspects are not negotiable. If you can\'t appreciate that then do not run a business.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work. If you are caught up in this rigmarole, what you are seeking to do is as futile as trying to lobby reality for custom settings. Adults caught up in this predicament are essentially adolescents trapped in big people’s bodies. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The shallow concept of mutual consent is another problem</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The issue of mutual consent in this context pertains to the essentials that keep the relationship growing and thriving and not anything untoward as it were. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the standard grade appreciation of the basis of functional relationships: Mutual Consent on initiatives or propositions. This simply refers to getting the buy-in of your partner for whatever you seek to do or accomplish with him/her. Quite straight forward this, no rattles nor blisters here. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>However, there is a higher grade appreciation of the basis of not only functional but flourishing relationships:&nbsp; Comprehensive Mutual Consent i.e. mutual consent on the both axes of propositioning as well as declining.  This refers to mutual consent being exercised on both ends of the communicative transaction. In other words, the one making an initiative seeks mutual consent of the other party and the target of the motion also seeks mutual consent in a case where the bid is declined. The fact is understandably quite elusive to many.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>We tend to emphasize consent on one end and yet de-emphasize it on the other. For example, if your partner wants to spend time or take a walk with you, usually the default setting is to check if you are in the mood or if you would like to do that or not, and if you don\'t feel like it you simply dispense a reflex,  knee-jerk and poorly thought-out unilateral \"No!\",  whereas a well negotiated consensual, loving and mutual turn down will serve the relationship better than a self-conceived, monocratic and veto-powered decline. When confronted with a decision making process that has a bearing on the relationship, the question to ask is not: \"Do I want to do this or not?\", the appropriate question to ask is, \"Does the relationship need this or not?\" A balanced way forward should be negotiated within that premise.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong> Many people tend to exercise veto power (unilateral decision making) in declining propositions or initiatives. This is the low hanging fruit of the insidious plague of self-centeredness. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>You will surely win the argument but lose the relationship</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember the sharpness of your argument for, or against it (whatever the initiative is) is completely irrelevant and lopsided if the needs of the significant other are trivialized. If you persist, you will surely win the argument but lose the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract wherein you get what you want and do not get what you do not want in the context of comprehensive mutual consent. A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract wherein you get what you want which serves the relationship. Among many other equally important factors, failure to understand and live by the principle of comprehensive mutual consent is the major reason why relationships fail. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Mental Hygiene on Why Relationships Fail','','inherit','closed','closed','','99783-revision-v1','','','2020-03-06 13:03:59','2020-03-06 11:03:59','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/99783-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99820,1,'2020-03-06 13:04:59','2020-03-06 11:04:59','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99784} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99784\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3 style=\"text-align:justify!important;\">Self is the invariable abattoir where many relationships are slaughtered </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Just like the old adage goes, it takes two to tango. In any given relationship paradigm there are at least two entities (persons) involved. A relationship is a social real estate whose ecosystem is the sum total of the net contributions of the two persons involved. The relationship stands apart as an independent entity which feeds on a diet radically different from that of its constituent persons, for it not just to survive but to flourish. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>There are certain things that are otherwise optional and yet compulsory for a relationship to work. You mean like really “compulsory” when it’s a relationship of two consenting adults? Indeed! Communication, intimacy, trust, respect, love, submission etc constitute the mandatory diet the relationship cannot live without. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Relationships fail because people confuse their personal needs and preferences for the needs of the relationship. Because of this grave mistake, persons then tend to think that needs of their relationships (which in many cases are confused for personal preferences and idiosyncrasies), are optional. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the thing, maybe you don’t like to communicate, perhaps you don’t feel like investing in quality time with your partner, or it could be that you have genuine trust issues, and maybe you struggle with respect, love, submission etc, however as far as the survival and flourishing of your relationship is concerned these aspects are neither optional nor negotiable.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99795} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/common-reasons-why-relationships-fail.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99795\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work </h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>It helps to understand and view the relationship as an entity separate from its persons just like it is with a business concept. Most of us understand that the moment you start running a business on personal preferences and whims at that very moment you have killed it. You may not like sales,&nbsp; or marketing management or even financial literacy, etc, however your enterprise needs a diligent praxis of these disciplines to survive and grow. As far as the survival and growth of your business is concerned these aspects are not negotiable. If you can\'t appreciate that then do not run a business.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Many try to have the best of both worlds, pander to their individualistic whims and self-centered preferences and still expect the relationship to work. If you are caught up in this rigmarole, what you are seeking to do is as futile as trying to lobby reality for custom settings. Adults caught up in this predicament are essentially adolescents trapped in big people’s bodies. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>The shallow concept of mutual consent is another problem</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The issue of mutual consent in this context pertains to the essentials that keep the relationship growing and thriving and not anything untoward as it were. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Here is the standard grade appreciation of the basis of functional relationships: Mutual Consent on initiatives or propositions. This simply refers to getting the buy-in of your partner for whatever you seek to do or accomplish with him/her. Quite straight forward this, no rattles nor blisters here. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>However, there is a higher grade appreciation of the basis of not only functional but flourishing relationships:&nbsp; Comprehensive Mutual Consent i.e. mutual consent on the both axes of propositioning as well as declining.  This refers to mutual consent being exercised on both ends of the communicative transaction. In other words, the one making an initiative seeks mutual consent of the other party and the target of the motion also seeks mutual consent in a case where the bid is declined. The fact is understandably quite elusive to many.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>We tend to emphasize consent on one end and yet de-emphasize it on the other. For example, if your partner wants to spend time or take a walk with you, usually the default setting is to check if you are in the mood or if you would like to do that or not, and if you don\'t feel like it you simply dispense a reflex,  knee-jerk and hardly thought-out unilateral \"No!\",  whereas a well negotiated consensual, loving and mutual turn down will serve the relationship better than a self-conceived, monocratic and veto-powered decline. When confronted with a decision making process that has a bearing on the relationship, the question to ask is not: \"Do I want to do this or not?\", the appropriate question to ask is, \"Does the relationship need this or not?\" A balanced way forward should be negotiated within that premise.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong> Many people tend to exercise veto power (unilateral decision making) in declining propositions or initiatives. This is the low hanging fruit of the insidious plague of self-centeredness. </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":3} -->\n<h3>You will surely win the argument but lose the relationship</h3>\n<!-- /wp:heading -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Remember the sharpness of your argument for, or against it (whatever the initiative is) is completely irrelevant and lopsided if the needs of the significant other are trivialized. If you persist, you will surely win the argument but lose the relationship. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract wherein you get what you want and do not get what you do not want in the context of comprehensive mutual consent. A good relationship is not a social contract in which you get what you want, it is a social contract wherein you get what you want which serves the relationship. Among many other equally important factors, failure to understand and live by the principle of comprehensive mutual consent is the major reason why relationships fail. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Mental Hygiene on Why Relationships Fail','','inherit','closed','closed','','99783-revision-v1','','','2020-03-06 13:04:59','2020-03-06 11:04:59','',99783,'https://expound.org.za/99783-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99822,1,'2020-03-10 22:34:48','2020-03-10 20:34:48','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99823} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/do-not-judge-others-expound-quotables-1024x576.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99823\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The working definition of “judging” for the purposes of this piece is “..to form a negative conclusion or opinion about someone or something”.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Judging others is commonplace to humans. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Not one of us is immune to those unguarded moments that ambush and get the “better” of us when we interface with fellow mankind. Worse still, there are those of us who automatically form and cement low opinions of other persons based on superficial differences such as race, caste, culture,dress, conduct, diet etc.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The biggest liability of judgementalism is that its ecosystem of small mindedness incapacitates the very mind to understand how and why it is fundamentally flawed.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The corrosive end goal of judgementalism, which is the\nobject the devil seeks, is that ultimately, we cease to view fellow humans as\nChrist sees them. The burden of souls and spirit of Christ do not coexist with\nthe “us” versus “them” mindset. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>This is the same kind of mindset Jonah had. Jonah was sent to preach repentance to the Ninevites, a nation he hated and despised. A nation he had written off in his mind and yet a nation God loved.  The sermon that Jonah preached was a paltry: “Forty more days and Nineveh will be overthrown.” Jonah 3:4  We learn that the phrase is even shorter in the original Hebrew perhaps just three (3) words or so.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In that short phrase Jonah had the ice breaker, the intro, the body, the conclusion and the alter call of the sermon. Talk about nauseating and non-committal mediocrity.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In a nutshell, the sermon brings to the fore the fallacy of\na convoluted psyche Jonah had. He was preaching to people hoping they don’t\nrepent. Have you ever called someone with hope that they don’t answer? Translated:\nYou can’t labour earnestly for souls you have such a low opinion of. And this\nis the struggle Jonah had.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The foul spirit of forming negative and uninformed opinions\nabout others is the outcome of the “judge” over estimating their importance and\nesteeming themselves better than the “judged” in a convoluted paradigm of\ncomparative holiness. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Inherently, introspective illiteracy is the pathogen of the\ndisease Judgementalism. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Unless the “judge” begins to gravitate towards Christ, whose\nlight will illuminate and project the vanity of every self-glorying human\nstation and show it for what it truly is, filthy rags, there is little hope for\nthe religiously hell-bound soul. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>“In the same way you judge others, you will be judged. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your neighbor’s eye? First take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your neighbor’s eye.” (Matthew 7:2-5)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Brain Bites</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:list -->\n<ul><li>When was the last time you discovered that the opinion you\nhad formed about a certain person was totally wrong?</li><li>When last did you judge someone and class them negatively in\nyour mind, only to connect better with them later until they became your\nfriend?</li><li>Have you ever been judged or misunderstood? How did it feel?</li><li>How did you feel when you made a grave mistake and you were\nforgiven?</li></ul>\n<!-- /wp:list -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Don’t hesitate to share your comments below.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><em>“When you judge another, you do not define them, you\ndefine yourself</em>.”&nbsp;Wayne Dyer</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy','','publish','open','open','','why-do-we-judge-others','','','2020-03-10 23:56:30','2020-03-10 21:56:30','',0,'https://expound.org.za/?p=99822',0,'post','',1),(99823,1,'2020-03-10 22:26:52','2020-03-10 20:26:52','','do-not-judge-others-expound-quotables','','inherit','open','closed','','do-not-judge-others-expound-quotables','','','2020-03-10 22:26:52','2020-03-10 20:26:52','',99822,'https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/do-not-judge-others-expound-quotables.png',0,'attachment','image/png',0),(99824,1,'2020-03-10 22:34:48','2020-03-10 20:34:48','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99823} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/do-not-judge-others-expound-quotables-1024x576.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99823\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The working definition of “judging” for the purposes of this\npiece is “..to form a conclusion or opinion about\nsomeone or something”.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Judging others is commonplace to humans. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Not one of us is immune to those unguarded moments that ambush and get the “better” of us when we interface with fellow mankind. Worse still, there are those of us who automatically form and cement low of opinions of other persons based on superficial differences such as dress, conduct, diet etc.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The biggest liability of judgementalism is that its ecosystem of small mindedness incapacitates the very mind to understand how and why it is fundamentally flawed.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The corrosive end goal of judgementalism, which is the\nobject the devil seeks, is that ultimately, we cease to view fellow humans as\nChrist sees them. The burden of souls and spirit of Christ do not coexist with\nthe “us” versus “them” mindset. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>This is the same kind of mindset Jonah had. The sermon that Jonah preached was a paltry: “Forty more days and Nineveh will be overthrown.” Jonah 3:4  I learn that the phrase is even shorter in the original Hebrew perhaps just three (3) words or so.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In that short phrase Jonah had the ice breaker, the intro,\nthe body, the conclusion and the alter call of the sermon. Talk about\nnauseating and non-committal mediocrity! </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In a nutshell, the sermon brings to the fore the fallacy of\na convoluted psyche Jonah had. He was preaching to people hoping they don’t\nrepent. Have you ever called someone with hope that they don’t answer? Translated:\nYou can’t labour earnestly for souls you have such a low opinion of. And this\nis the struggle Jonah had.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The foul spirit of forming negative and uninformed opinions\nabout others is the outcome of the “judge” over estimating their importance and\nesteeming themselves better than the “judged” in a convoluted paradigm of\ncomparative holiness. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Inherently, introspective illiteracy is the pathogen of the\ndisease Judgementalism. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Unless the “judge” begins to gravitate towards Christ, whose\nlight will illuminate and project the vanity of every self-glorying human\nstation and show it for what it truly is, filthy rags, there is little hope for\nthe religiously hell-bound soul. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Verse: “In the same way you judge others, you will be\njudged. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your neighbor’s eye? First\ntake the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the\nspeck from your neighbor’s eye.” (Matthew 7:2-5)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Brain Bites</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:list -->\n<ul><li>When was the last time you discovered that the opinion you\nhad formed about a certain person was totally wrong?</li><li>When last did you judge someone and class them negatively in\nyour mind, only to connect better with them later until they became your\nfriend?</li><li>Have you ever been judged or misunderstood? How did it feel?</li><li>How did you feel when you made a grave mistake and you were\nforgiven?</li></ul>\n<!-- /wp:list -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Don’t hesitate to share your comments below.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><em>“When you judge another, you do not define them, you\ndefine yourself</em>.”&nbsp;Wayne Dyer</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy','','inherit','closed','closed','','99822-revision-v1','','','2020-03-10 22:34:48','2020-03-10 20:34:48','',99822,'https://expound.org.za/99822-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99825,1,'2020-03-10 22:38:04','2020-03-10 20:38:04','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99823} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/do-not-judge-others-expound-quotables-1024x576.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99823\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The working definition of “judging” for the purposes of this\npiece is “..to form a conclusion or opinion about\nsomeone or something”.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Judging others is commonplace to humans. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Not one of us is immune to those unguarded moments that ambush and get the “better” of us when we interface with fellow mankind. Worse still, there are those of us who automatically form and cement low opinions of other persons based on superficial differences such as race, caste, culture,dress, conduct, diet etc.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The biggest liability of judgementalism is that its ecosystem of small mindedness incapacitates the very mind to understand how and why it is fundamentally flawed.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The corrosive end goal of judgementalism, which is the\nobject the devil seeks, is that ultimately, we cease to view fellow humans as\nChrist sees them. The burden of souls and spirit of Christ do not coexist with\nthe “us” versus “them” mindset. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>This is the same kind of mindset Jonah had. The sermon that Jonah preached was a paltry: “Forty more days and Nineveh will be overthrown.” Jonah 3:4  I learn that the phrase is even shorter in the original Hebrew perhaps just three (3) words or so.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In that short phrase Jonah had the ice breaker, the intro,\nthe body, the conclusion and the alter call of the sermon. Talk about\nnauseating and non-committal mediocrity! </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In a nutshell, the sermon brings to the fore the fallacy of\na convoluted psyche Jonah had. He was preaching to people hoping they don’t\nrepent. Have you ever called someone with hope that they don’t answer? Translated:\nYou can’t labour earnestly for souls you have such a low opinion of. And this\nis the struggle Jonah had.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The foul spirit of forming negative and uninformed opinions\nabout others is the outcome of the “judge” over estimating their importance and\nesteeming themselves better than the “judged” in a convoluted paradigm of\ncomparative holiness. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Inherently, introspective illiteracy is the pathogen of the\ndisease Judgementalism. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Unless the “judge” begins to gravitate towards Christ, whose\nlight will illuminate and project the vanity of every self-glorying human\nstation and show it for what it truly is, filthy rags, there is little hope for\nthe religiously hell-bound soul. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Verse: “In the same way you judge others, you will be\njudged. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your neighbor’s eye? First\ntake the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the\nspeck from your neighbor’s eye.” (Matthew 7:2-5)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Brain Bites</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:list -->\n<ul><li>When was the last time you discovered that the opinion you\nhad formed about a certain person was totally wrong?</li><li>When last did you judge someone and class them negatively in\nyour mind, only to connect better with them later until they became your\nfriend?</li><li>Have you ever been judged or misunderstood? How did it feel?</li><li>How did you feel when you made a grave mistake and you were\nforgiven?</li></ul>\n<!-- /wp:list -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Don’t hesitate to share your comments below.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><em>“When you judge another, you do not define them, you\ndefine yourself</em>.”&nbsp;Wayne Dyer</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy','','inherit','closed','closed','','99822-revision-v1','','','2020-03-10 22:38:04','2020-03-10 20:38:04','',99822,'https://expound.org.za/99822-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99828,1,'2020-03-10 22:54:43','2020-03-10 20:54:43','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99823} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/do-not-judge-others-expound-quotables-1024x576.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99823\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The working definition of “judging” for the purposes of this\npiece is “..to form a conclusion or opinion about\nsomeone or something”.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Judging others is commonplace to humans. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Not one of us is immune to those unguarded moments that ambush and get the “better” of us when we interface with fellow mankind. Worse still, there are those of us who automatically form and cement low opinions of other persons based on superficial differences such as race, caste, culture,dress, conduct, diet etc.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The biggest liability of judgementalism is that its ecosystem of small mindedness incapacitates the very mind to understand how and why it is fundamentally flawed.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The corrosive end goal of judgementalism, which is the\nobject the devil seeks, is that ultimately, we cease to view fellow humans as\nChrist sees them. The burden of souls and spirit of Christ do not coexist with\nthe “us” versus “them” mindset. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>This is the same kind of mindset Jonah had. Jonah was sent to preach repentance to the Ninevites, a nation he hated and despised. A nation he had written off in his mind and yet a nation God loved.  The sermon that Jonah preached was a paltry: “Forty more days and Nineveh will be overthrown.” Jonah 3:4  We learn that the phrase is even shorter in the original Hebrew perhaps just three (3) words or so.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In that short phrase Jonah had the ice breaker, the intro,\nthe body, the conclusion and the alter call of the sermon. Talk about\nnauseating and non-committal mediocrity! </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In a nutshell, the sermon brings to the fore the fallacy of\na convoluted psyche Jonah had. He was preaching to people hoping they don’t\nrepent. Have you ever called someone with hope that they don’t answer? Translated:\nYou can’t labour earnestly for souls you have such a low opinion of. And this\nis the struggle Jonah had.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The foul spirit of forming negative and uninformed opinions\nabout others is the outcome of the “judge” over estimating their importance and\nesteeming themselves better than the “judged” in a convoluted paradigm of\ncomparative holiness. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Inherently, introspective illiteracy is the pathogen of the\ndisease Judgementalism. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Unless the “judge” begins to gravitate towards Christ, whose\nlight will illuminate and project the vanity of every self-glorying human\nstation and show it for what it truly is, filthy rags, there is little hope for\nthe religiously hell-bound soul. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Verse: “In the same way you judge others, you will be\njudged. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your neighbor’s eye? First\ntake the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the\nspeck from your neighbor’s eye.” (Matthew 7:2-5)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Brain Bites</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:list -->\n<ul><li>When was the last time you discovered that the opinion you\nhad formed about a certain person was totally wrong?</li><li>When last did you judge someone and class them negatively in\nyour mind, only to connect better with them later until they became your\nfriend?</li><li>Have you ever been judged or misunderstood? How did it feel?</li><li>How did you feel when you made a grave mistake and you were\nforgiven?</li></ul>\n<!-- /wp:list -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Don’t hesitate to share your comments below.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><em>“When you judge another, you do not define them, you\ndefine yourself</em>.”&nbsp;Wayne Dyer</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy','','inherit','closed','closed','','99822-revision-v1','','','2020-03-10 22:54:43','2020-03-10 20:54:43','',99822,'https://expound.org.za/99822-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99827,1,'2020-03-10 22:54:27','2020-03-10 20:54:27','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99823} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/do-not-judge-others-expound-quotables-1024x576.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99823\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The working definition of “judging” for the purposes of this\npiece is “..to form a conclusion or opinion about\nsomeone or something”.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Judging others is commonplace to humans. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Not one of us is immune to those unguarded moments that ambush and get the “better” of us when we interface with fellow mankind. Worse still, there are those of us who automatically form and cement low opinions of other persons based on superficial differences such as race, caste, culture,dress, conduct, diet etc.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The biggest liability of judgementalism is that its ecosystem of small mindedness incapacitates the very mind to understand how and why it is fundamentally flawed.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The corrosive end goal of judgementalism, which is the\nobject the devil seeks, is that ultimately, we cease to view fellow humans as\nChrist sees them. The burden of souls and spirit of Christ do not coexist with\nthe “us” versus “them” mindset. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>This is the same kind of mindset Jonah had. Jonah was sent to preach repentance to the Ninevites, a nation he hated and despised. A nation he had written off in his mind and yet a nation God loved.  The sermon that Jonah preached was a paltry: “Forty more days and Nineveh will be overthrown.” Jonah 3:4  I learn that the phrase is even shorter in the original Hebrew perhaps just three (3) words or so.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In that short phrase Jonah had the ice breaker, the intro,\nthe body, the conclusion and the alter call of the sermon. Talk about\nnauseating and non-committal mediocrity! </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In a nutshell, the sermon brings to the fore the fallacy of\na convoluted psyche Jonah had. He was preaching to people hoping they don’t\nrepent. Have you ever called someone with hope that they don’t answer? Translated:\nYou can’t labour earnestly for souls you have such a low opinion of. And this\nis the struggle Jonah had.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The foul spirit of forming negative and uninformed opinions\nabout others is the outcome of the “judge” over estimating their importance and\nesteeming themselves better than the “judged” in a convoluted paradigm of\ncomparative holiness. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Inherently, introspective illiteracy is the pathogen of the\ndisease Judgementalism. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Unless the “judge” begins to gravitate towards Christ, whose\nlight will illuminate and project the vanity of every self-glorying human\nstation and show it for what it truly is, filthy rags, there is little hope for\nthe religiously hell-bound soul. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Verse: “In the same way you judge others, you will be\njudged. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your neighbor’s eye? First\ntake the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the\nspeck from your neighbor’s eye.” (Matthew 7:2-5)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Brain Bites</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:list -->\n<ul><li>When was the last time you discovered that the opinion you\nhad formed about a certain person was totally wrong?</li><li>When last did you judge someone and class them negatively in\nyour mind, only to connect better with them later until they became your\nfriend?</li><li>Have you ever been judged or misunderstood? How did it feel?</li><li>How did you feel when you made a grave mistake and you were\nforgiven?</li></ul>\n<!-- /wp:list -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Don’t hesitate to share your comments below.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><em>“When you judge another, you do not define them, you\ndefine yourself</em>.”&nbsp;Wayne Dyer</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy','','inherit','closed','closed','','99822-revision-v1','','','2020-03-10 22:54:27','2020-03-10 20:54:27','',99822,'https://expound.org.za/99822-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99829,1,'2020-03-10 22:55:06','2020-03-10 20:55:06','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99823} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/do-not-judge-others-expound-quotables-1024x576.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99823\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The working definition of “judging” for the purposes of this\npiece is “..to form a conclusion or opinion about\nsomeone or something”.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Judging others is commonplace to humans. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Not one of us is immune to those unguarded moments that ambush and get the “better” of us when we interface with fellow mankind. Worse still, there are those of us who automatically form and cement low opinions of other persons based on superficial differences such as race, caste, culture,dress, conduct, diet etc.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The biggest liability of judgementalism is that its ecosystem of small mindedness incapacitates the very mind to understand how and why it is fundamentally flawed.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The corrosive end goal of judgementalism, which is the\nobject the devil seeks, is that ultimately, we cease to view fellow humans as\nChrist sees them. The burden of souls and spirit of Christ do not coexist with\nthe “us” versus “them” mindset. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>This is the same kind of mindset Jonah had. Jonah was sent to preach repentance to the Ninevites, a nation he hated and despised. A nation he had written off in his mind and yet a nation God loved.  The sermon that Jonah preached was a paltry: “Forty more days and Nineveh will be overthrown.” Jonah 3:4  We learn that the phrase is even shorter in the original Hebrew perhaps just three (3) words or so.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In that short phrase Jonah had the ice breaker, the intro, the body, the conclusion and the alter call of the sermon. Talk about nauseating and non-committal mediocrity.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In a nutshell, the sermon brings to the fore the fallacy of\na convoluted psyche Jonah had. He was preaching to people hoping they don’t\nrepent. Have you ever called someone with hope that they don’t answer? Translated:\nYou can’t labour earnestly for souls you have such a low opinion of. And this\nis the struggle Jonah had.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The foul spirit of forming negative and uninformed opinions\nabout others is the outcome of the “judge” over estimating their importance and\nesteeming themselves better than the “judged” in a convoluted paradigm of\ncomparative holiness. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Inherently, introspective illiteracy is the pathogen of the\ndisease Judgementalism. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Unless the “judge” begins to gravitate towards Christ, whose\nlight will illuminate and project the vanity of every self-glorying human\nstation and show it for what it truly is, filthy rags, there is little hope for\nthe religiously hell-bound soul. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Verse: “In the same way you judge others, you will be\njudged. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your neighbor’s eye? First\ntake the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the\nspeck from your neighbor’s eye.” (Matthew 7:2-5)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Brain Bites</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:list -->\n<ul><li>When was the last time you discovered that the opinion you\nhad formed about a certain person was totally wrong?</li><li>When last did you judge someone and class them negatively in\nyour mind, only to connect better with them later until they became your\nfriend?</li><li>Have you ever been judged or misunderstood? How did it feel?</li><li>How did you feel when you made a grave mistake and you were\nforgiven?</li></ul>\n<!-- /wp:list -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Don’t hesitate to share your comments below.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><em>“When you judge another, you do not define them, you\ndefine yourself</em>.”&nbsp;Wayne Dyer</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy','','inherit','closed','closed','','99822-revision-v1','','','2020-03-10 22:55:06','2020-03-10 20:55:06','',99822,'https://expound.org.za/99822-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99830,1,'2020-03-10 23:45:51','2020-03-10 21:45:51','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99823} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/do-not-judge-others-expound-quotables-1024x576.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99823\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The working definition of “judging” for the purposes of this\npiece is “..to form a conclusion or opinion about\nsomeone or something”.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Judging others is commonplace to humans. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Not one of us is immune to those unguarded moments that ambush and get the “better” of us when we interface with fellow mankind. Worse still, there are those of us who automatically form and cement low opinions of other persons based on superficial differences such as race, caste, culture,dress, conduct, diet etc.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The biggest liability of judgementalism is that its ecosystem of small mindedness incapacitates the very mind to understand how and why it is fundamentally flawed.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The corrosive end goal of judgementalism, which is the\nobject the devil seeks, is that ultimately, we cease to view fellow humans as\nChrist sees them. The burden of souls and spirit of Christ do not coexist with\nthe “us” versus “them” mindset. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>This is the same kind of mindset Jonah had. Jonah was sent to preach repentance to the Ninevites, a nation he hated and despised. A nation he had written off in his mind and yet a nation God loved.  The sermon that Jonah preached was a paltry: “Forty more days and Nineveh will be overthrown.” Jonah 3:4  We learn that the phrase is even shorter in the original Hebrew perhaps just three (3) words or so.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In that short phrase Jonah had the ice breaker, the intro, the body, the conclusion and the alter call of the sermon. Talk about nauseating and non-committal mediocrity.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In a nutshell, the sermon brings to the fore the fallacy of\na convoluted psyche Jonah had. He was preaching to people hoping they don’t\nrepent. Have you ever called someone with hope that they don’t answer? Translated:\nYou can’t labour earnestly for souls you have such a low opinion of. And this\nis the struggle Jonah had.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The foul spirit of forming negative and uninformed opinions\nabout others is the outcome of the “judge” over estimating their importance and\nesteeming themselves better than the “judged” in a convoluted paradigm of\ncomparative holiness. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Inherently, introspective illiteracy is the pathogen of the\ndisease Judgementalism. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Unless the “judge” begins to gravitate towards Christ, whose\nlight will illuminate and project the vanity of every self-glorying human\nstation and show it for what it truly is, filthy rags, there is little hope for\nthe religiously hell-bound soul. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>“In the same way you judge others, you will be judged. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your neighbor’s eye? First take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your neighbor’s eye.” (Matthew 7:2-5)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Brain Bites</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:list -->\n<ul><li>When was the last time you discovered that the opinion you\nhad formed about a certain person was totally wrong?</li><li>When last did you judge someone and class them negatively in\nyour mind, only to connect better with them later until they became your\nfriend?</li><li>Have you ever been judged or misunderstood? How did it feel?</li><li>How did you feel when you made a grave mistake and you were\nforgiven?</li></ul>\n<!-- /wp:list -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Don’t hesitate to share your comments below.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><em>“When you judge another, you do not define them, you\ndefine yourself</em>.”&nbsp;Wayne Dyer</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy','','inherit','closed','closed','','99822-revision-v1','','','2020-03-10 23:45:51','2020-03-10 21:45:51','',99822,'https://expound.org.za/99822-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99831,1,'2020-03-10 23:56:24','2020-03-10 21:56:24','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99823} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/do-not-judge-others-expound-quotables-1024x576.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-99823\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The working definition of “judging” for the purposes of this piece is “..to form a negative conclusion or opinion about someone or something”.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Judging others is commonplace to humans. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Not one of us is immune to those unguarded moments that ambush and get the “better” of us when we interface with fellow mankind. Worse still, there are those of us who automatically form and cement low opinions of other persons based on superficial differences such as race, caste, culture,dress, conduct, diet etc.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The biggest liability of judgementalism is that its ecosystem of small mindedness incapacitates the very mind to understand how and why it is fundamentally flawed.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The corrosive end goal of judgementalism, which is the\nobject the devil seeks, is that ultimately, we cease to view fellow humans as\nChrist sees them. The burden of souls and spirit of Christ do not coexist with\nthe “us” versus “them” mindset. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>This is the same kind of mindset Jonah had. Jonah was sent to preach repentance to the Ninevites, a nation he hated and despised. A nation he had written off in his mind and yet a nation God loved.  The sermon that Jonah preached was a paltry: “Forty more days and Nineveh will be overthrown.” Jonah 3:4  We learn that the phrase is even shorter in the original Hebrew perhaps just three (3) words or so.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In that short phrase Jonah had the ice breaker, the intro, the body, the conclusion and the alter call of the sermon. Talk about nauseating and non-committal mediocrity.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In a nutshell, the sermon brings to the fore the fallacy of\na convoluted psyche Jonah had. He was preaching to people hoping they don’t\nrepent. Have you ever called someone with hope that they don’t answer? Translated:\nYou can’t labour earnestly for souls you have such a low opinion of. And this\nis the struggle Jonah had.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The foul spirit of forming negative and uninformed opinions\nabout others is the outcome of the “judge” over estimating their importance and\nesteeming themselves better than the “judged” in a convoluted paradigm of\ncomparative holiness. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Inherently, introspective illiteracy is the pathogen of the\ndisease Judgementalism. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Unless the “judge” begins to gravitate towards Christ, whose\nlight will illuminate and project the vanity of every self-glorying human\nstation and show it for what it truly is, filthy rags, there is little hope for\nthe religiously hell-bound soul. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>“In the same way you judge others, you will be judged. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your neighbor’s eye? First take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your neighbor’s eye.” (Matthew 7:2-5)</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Brain Bites</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:list -->\n<ul><li>When was the last time you discovered that the opinion you\nhad formed about a certain person was totally wrong?</li><li>When last did you judge someone and class them negatively in\nyour mind, only to connect better with them later until they became your\nfriend?</li><li>Have you ever been judged or misunderstood? How did it feel?</li><li>How did you feel when you made a grave mistake and you were\nforgiven?</li></ul>\n<!-- /wp:list -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Don’t hesitate to share your comments below.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><em>“When you judge another, you do not define them, you\ndefine yourself</em>.”&nbsp;Wayne Dyer</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy','','inherit','closed','closed','','99822-revision-v1','','','2020-03-10 23:56:24','2020-03-10 21:56:24','',99822,'https://expound.org.za/99822-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99841,1,'2020-03-14 22:23:25','2020-03-14 20:23:25','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99839} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/churh-and-dress-code-suit-and-neck-tie-bondage-1024x364.png\" alt=\"Suit and necktie bondage. Church and dress code\" class=\"wp-image-99839\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>I can barely imagine any issue\nthat is as half as decisive as the issue of dress and music in Christendom. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The point of departure for\nthis post is captured in the title, “Does wearing a suit and a necktie make you\nholy?”. “Suit and necktie” are chosen for immediate resonance and are by no\nmeans used to disenfranchise the females from the discourse. By extension, the\nquestion interrogates the issue of what holiness really is and whether or not\nlegalistic impositions on conduct for corporate worship do hold water. The\nquestion that also arises, inescapably is, what attire is acceptable for\nchurch? Should such a question even arise?</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Two framing contentions.</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:list {\"ordered\":true} -->\n<ol><li>Some Christians feel people need to come dressed at their “best” when they come to church for they come to meet their King and as such they have to be in their best (formal) attire and conduct.</li><li>Some feel the issue of attire is a non-issue as the defining principle of true worship is worshiping God in spirit and truth.</li></ol>\n<!-- /wp:list -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<strong> Let’s delve into a few insights and then conclude a few biblical guidelines</strong>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Let’s deal with the first\nframing contention that asserts that we should come to church at our best\nattire (and in most cases “best” is misused as synonym for “formal”) as we are\ncoming to meet our King, as a matter of fact, the King of the Universe. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>This notion seems to curry favor with a lot of average Christian thinking that has been regrettably entrenched as gospel truth. The argument that when we come to church we are coming to meet our King and thus we should be in the best (formal) of our attires only holds water until we appreciate that the very King is our Father. Do you really need to dress up to meet your Dad? God is many things to us but His defining principle for our relationship with Him is that He is our Father, for we are His sons and daughters.  At this point there is no need to deconstruct the “formalistic” spat further, its flawed framing is sufficiently and defectively fatal. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Secondly, God is omnipresent.\nThis denotes that He is present everywhere without necessarily having to be\nphysically present everywhere for He arts in heaven. The nub of this fact is\nthat we live in the presence of God in our homes, in whatever business we do in\nour kitchens, bedrooms, bathrooms and elsewhere (everywhere) God is ever\npresent. We do not go to church to meet God primarily, although we ultimately\ndo as He is the center of what we go to church for. Nonetheless we go to church\nprimarily to fellowship with fellow humans, of course in the presence of an\never present God. Thus; most of our notions of decorum and propriety are\ninformed more by culture and human expectations which have nothing at all to do\nwith God. Nothing is sad as humanity anointing mere tradition on the throne of\ngospel truth and generations swallowing the formalistic palaver as if it were a\nthus saith the Lord. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In order to exercise mental\nhygiene on this issue, the formalistic tribe who are driven by a lopsided ratio\nof zeal to knowledge must interrogate the basis of their positions on this\nissue. In most cases the dogmatic overbearing disposition stems from mere\nsocialisation. There is no wisdom in reason that is circumscribed within the\nconfines of socialisation and taps not from the rich and diverse cultures and\nexperiences outside its place of birth and death. A fixation on mere tradition\nis what led to the Jews crucifying their own messiah. Perish the thought of\ndead formalistic traditionalism. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The biggest currency for true\nfellowship and Christianity is social literacy or social intelligence; which\nderives from Christian love and high levels of tolerance for the next human\nbeing. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3>Biblical guidelines on dress</h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>&nbsp;1 Peter 3:3-4 </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>3 Your beauty should not come\nfrom outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold\njewellery or fine clothes. 4 Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the\nunfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s\nsight.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph {\"align\":\"left\"} -->\n<p style=\"text-align:left\"><strong>A few takes-homes</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3> While the preferential aspects of modesty are subjective, the principle is objective </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>One fundamental principle of\ndress across the bible is modesty. Then there are those of us who will seek to\nsubjectivise and relativise the issue of modesty until there is nothing left to\nwork with and thus inevitably undermining the wisdom of God in giving&nbsp; the principle. While superficial and\npreferential aspects of modesty can be debated, the core fundaments of the\nprinciple are sufficiently objective. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Modesty fundamentally means\nthat whatever is chosen as dress or attire should not emphasise sexuality. If\nyou are struggling with what this means and boils down to practically, I have\nno doubt in my mind that God will help you if you are sincere. Prescriptivism\nhas been one major problem around the issue of dress and to venture into\nprescribing mechanically what to wear or what not to wear is to miss the point\nby huge stretch. My view is that Jesus has the knowledge, wisdom and capability\nto dress up His children to His satisfaction. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The best way to assimilate the\nprinciple of modest is to ask a few questions when dealing with the issue of\ndress:</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Does this attire deemphasise\nmy sexuality? </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Does the attire help me focus\nless on myself and more on God? </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>If you can answer “yes” earnestly\nto those both questions then go ahead and wear it. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>By the way this is the reason\nwhy most people are comfortable in adorning casual attire rather than rocking\nup in overly formal wear at church. In most cases, encumbering formal wear like\na suit or anything similar for females, tend to keep the wearer more\nself-conscious and self-absorbed than modest yet casual apparel that\nessentially divests attention from self.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3> Principles of Modesty are for our edification </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>This is very important. Having\nasserted the objective principle of modesty I have to state that the principles\nof modesty and all education on how we should conduct ourselves are for our\nedification and the edification of those we have influence over. These\nprinciples are not for sizing up or measuring the spirituality of others. In\nother words, the biblical principles of modesty are for our benefit and the\nbenefit of those we have access to influence positively. These principles are\nNOT for policing fellow mortals and curating their spirituality based on the\nshortness or lengths of their skirts or on whether their attires meet our rigid\nand formalistic human standards. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h2>The principles of modesty are a shield and not a weapon.</h2>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Consider this, “The foul spirit of forming negative and uninformed opinions about others is the outcome of the “judge” over estimating their importance and esteeming themselves better than the “judged” in a convoluted paradigm of comparative holiness.” (<strong><a href=\"https://expound.org.za/why-do-we-judge-others/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" aria-label=\"Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy, Expound: 2020 (opens in a new tab)\">Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy, Expound: 2020</a>)</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In conclusion, wearing a tie\nand a suit or whatever the equivalent are for females does not make anyone\nholy. Holiness is an outcome of: rather than a means to salvation. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Don’t hesitate to share your\nthoughts below. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Recommended Post: </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong><a href=\"https://expound.org.za/why-do-we-judge-others/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" aria-label=\"Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy (opens in a new tab)\">Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy</a></strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Does wearing a suit and necktie make you holy? Mental hygiene on church and dress','','inherit','closed','closed','','99838-revision-v1','','','2020-03-14 22:23:25','2020-03-14 20:23:25','',99838,'https://expound.org.za/99838-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99842,1,'2020-03-14 22:23:42','2020-03-14 20:23:42','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99839} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/churh-and-dress-code-suit-and-neck-tie-bondage-1024x364.png\" alt=\"Suit and necktie bondage. Church and dress code\" class=\"wp-image-99839\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>I can barely imagine any issue\nthat is as half as decisive as the issue of dress and music in Christendom. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The point of departure for\nthis post is captured in the title, “Does wearing a suit and a necktie make you\nholy?”. “Suit and necktie” are chosen for immediate resonance and are by no\nmeans used to disenfranchise the females from the discourse. By extension, the\nquestion interrogates the issue of what holiness really is and whether or not\nlegalistic impositions on conduct for corporate worship do hold water. The\nquestion that also arises, inescapably is, what attire is acceptable for\nchurch? Should such a question even arise?</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Two framing contentions.</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:list {\"ordered\":true} -->\n<ol><li>Some Christians feel people need to come dressed at their “best” when they come to church for they come to meet their King and as such they have to be in their best (formal) attire and conduct.</li><li>Some feel the issue of attire is a non-issue as the defining principle of true worship is worshiping God in spirit and truth.</li></ol>\n<!-- /wp:list -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<strong> Let’s delve into a few insights and then conclude a few biblical guidelines</strong>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Let’s deal with the first\nframing contention that asserts that we should come to church at our best\nattire (and in most cases “best” is misused as synonym for “formal”) as we are\ncoming to meet our King, as a matter of fact, the King of the Universe. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>This notion seems to curry favor with a lot of average Christian thinking that has been regrettably entrenched as gospel truth. The argument that when we come to church we are coming to meet our King and thus we should be in the best (formal) of our attires only holds water until we appreciate that the very King is our Father. Do you really need to dress up to meet your Dad? God is many things to us but His defining principle for our relationship with Him is that He is our Father, for we are His sons and daughters.  At this point there is no need to deconstruct the “formalistic” spat further, its flawed framing is sufficiently and defectively untenable. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Secondly, God is omnipresent.\nThis denotes that He is present everywhere without necessarily having to be\nphysically present everywhere for He arts in heaven. The nub of this fact is\nthat we live in the presence of God in our homes, in whatever business we do in\nour kitchens, bedrooms, bathrooms and elsewhere (everywhere) God is ever\npresent. We do not go to church to meet God primarily, although we ultimately\ndo as He is the center of what we go to church for. Nonetheless we go to church\nprimarily to fellowship with fellow humans, of course in the presence of an\never present God. Thus; most of our notions of decorum and propriety are\ninformed more by culture and human expectations which have nothing at all to do\nwith God. Nothing is sad as humanity anointing mere tradition on the throne of\ngospel truth and generations swallowing the formalistic palaver as if it were a\nthus saith the Lord. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In order to exercise mental\nhygiene on this issue, the formalistic tribe who are driven by a lopsided ratio\nof zeal to knowledge must interrogate the basis of their positions on this\nissue. In most cases the dogmatic overbearing disposition stems from mere\nsocialisation. There is no wisdom in reason that is circumscribed within the\nconfines of socialisation and taps not from the rich and diverse cultures and\nexperiences outside its place of birth and death. A fixation on mere tradition\nis what led to the Jews crucifying their own messiah. Perish the thought of\ndead formalistic traditionalism. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The biggest currency for true\nfellowship and Christianity is social literacy or social intelligence; which\nderives from Christian love and high levels of tolerance for the next human\nbeing. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3>Biblical guidelines on dress</h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>&nbsp;1 Peter 3:3-4 </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>3 Your beauty should not come\nfrom outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold\njewellery or fine clothes. 4 Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the\nunfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s\nsight.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph {\"align\":\"left\"} -->\n<p style=\"text-align:left\"><strong>A few takes-homes</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3> While the preferential aspects of modesty are subjective, the principle is objective </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>One fundamental principle of\ndress across the bible is modesty. Then there are those of us who will seek to\nsubjectivise and relativise the issue of modesty until there is nothing left to\nwork with and thus inevitably undermining the wisdom of God in giving&nbsp; the principle. While superficial and\npreferential aspects of modesty can be debated, the core fundaments of the\nprinciple are sufficiently objective. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Modesty fundamentally means\nthat whatever is chosen as dress or attire should not emphasise sexuality. If\nyou are struggling with what this means and boils down to practically, I have\nno doubt in my mind that God will help you if you are sincere. Prescriptivism\nhas been one major problem around the issue of dress and to venture into\nprescribing mechanically what to wear or what not to wear is to miss the point\nby huge stretch. My view is that Jesus has the knowledge, wisdom and capability\nto dress up His children to His satisfaction. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The best way to assimilate the\nprinciple of modest is to ask a few questions when dealing with the issue of\ndress:</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Does this attire deemphasise\nmy sexuality? </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Does the attire help me focus\nless on myself and more on God? </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>If you can answer “yes” earnestly\nto those both questions then go ahead and wear it. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>By the way this is the reason\nwhy most people are comfortable in adorning casual attire rather than rocking\nup in overly formal wear at church. In most cases, encumbering formal wear like\na suit or anything similar for females, tend to keep the wearer more\nself-conscious and self-absorbed than modest yet casual apparel that\nessentially divests attention from self.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3> Principles of Modesty are for our edification </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>This is very important. Having\nasserted the objective principle of modesty I have to state that the principles\nof modesty and all education on how we should conduct ourselves are for our\nedification and the edification of those we have influence over. These\nprinciples are not for sizing up or measuring the spirituality of others. In\nother words, the biblical principles of modesty are for our benefit and the\nbenefit of those we have access to influence positively. These principles are\nNOT for policing fellow mortals and curating their spirituality based on the\nshortness or lengths of their skirts or on whether their attires meet our rigid\nand formalistic human standards. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h2>The principles of modesty are a shield and not a weapon.</h2>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Consider this, “The foul spirit of forming negative and uninformed opinions about others is the outcome of the “judge” over estimating their importance and esteeming themselves better than the “judged” in a convoluted paradigm of comparative holiness.” (<strong><a href=\"https://expound.org.za/why-do-we-judge-others/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" aria-label=\"Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy, Expound: 2020 (opens in a new tab)\">Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy, Expound: 2020</a>)</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In conclusion, wearing a tie\nand a suit or whatever the equivalent are for females does not make anyone\nholy. Holiness is an outcome of: rather than a means to salvation. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Don’t hesitate to share your\nthoughts below. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Recommended Post: </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong><a href=\"https://expound.org.za/why-do-we-judge-others/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" aria-label=\"Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy (opens in a new tab)\">Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy</a></strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Does wearing a suit and necktie make you holy? Mental hygiene on church and dress','','inherit','closed','closed','','99838-revision-v1','','','2020-03-14 22:23:42','2020-03-14 20:23:42','',99838,'https://expound.org.za/99838-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99843,1,'2020-03-14 22:29:08','2020-03-14 20:29:08','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99839} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/churh-and-dress-code-suit-and-neck-tie-bondage-1024x364.png\" alt=\"Suit and necktie bondage. Church and dress code\" class=\"wp-image-99839\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>I can barely imagine any issue\nthat is as half as decisive as the issue of dress and music in Christendom. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The point of departure for\nthis post is captured in the title, “Does wearing a suit and a necktie make you\nholy?”. “Suit and necktie” are chosen for immediate resonance and are by no\nmeans used to disenfranchise the females from the discourse. By extension, the\nquestion interrogates the issue of what holiness really is and whether or not\nlegalistic impositions on conduct for corporate worship do hold water. The\nquestion that also arises, inescapably is, what attire is acceptable for\nchurch? Should such a question even arise?</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Two framing contentions.</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:list {\"ordered\":true} -->\n<ol><li>Some Christians feel people need to come dressed at their “best” when they come to church for they come to meet their King and as such they have to be in their best (formal) attire and conduct.</li><li>Some feel the issue of attire is a non-issue as the defining principle of true worship is worshiping God in spirit and truth.</li></ol>\n<!-- /wp:list -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<strong> Let’s delve into a few insights and then conclude a few biblical guidelines</strong>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Let’s deal with the first\nframing contention that asserts that we should come to church at our best\nattire (and in most cases “best” is misused as synonym for “formal”) as we are\ncoming to meet our King, as a matter of fact, the King of the Universe. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>This notion seems to curry favor with a lot of average Christian thinking that has been regrettably entrenched as gospel truth. The argument that when we come to church we are coming to meet our King and thus we should be in the best (formal) of our attires only holds water until we appreciate that the very King is our Father. Do you really need to dress up to meet your Dad? God is many things to us but His defining principle for our relationship with Him is that He is our Father, for we are His sons and daughters.  At this point there is no need to deconstruct the “formalistic” spat further, its flawed framing is sufficiently and defectively untenable. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Secondly, God is omnipresent. This denotes that He is present everywhere without necessarily having to be physically present everywhere for He arts in heaven. The nub of this fact is that we live in the presence of God in our homes, in whatever business we do in our kitchens, bedrooms, bathrooms and elsewhere (everywhere) God is ever present. We do not go to church to meet God primarily, although we ultimately do as He is the center of what we go to church for. Nonetheless we go to church primarily to fellowship with fellow humans, of course in the presence of an ever present God. Thus; most of our notions of decorum and propriety are informed more by culture and human expectations which have nothing at all to do with God. Nothing is sad as seeing humanity anoint mere tradition on the throne of gospel truth and generations swallowing the formalistic palaver as if it were a thus saith the Lord. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In order to exercise mental\nhygiene on this issue, the formalistic tribe who are driven by a lopsided ratio\nof zeal to knowledge must interrogate the basis of their positions on this\nissue. In most cases the dogmatic overbearing disposition stems from mere\nsocialisation. There is no wisdom in reason that is circumscribed within the\nconfines of socialisation and taps not from the rich and diverse cultures and\nexperiences outside its place of birth and death. A fixation on mere tradition\nis what led to the Jews crucifying their own messiah. Perish the thought of\ndead formalistic traditionalism. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The biggest currency for true\nfellowship and Christianity is social literacy or social intelligence; which\nderives from Christian love and high levels of tolerance for the next human\nbeing. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3>Biblical guidelines on dress</h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>&nbsp;1 Peter 3:3-4 </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>3 Your beauty should not come\nfrom outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold\njewellery or fine clothes. 4 Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the\nunfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s\nsight.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph {\"align\":\"left\"} -->\n<p style=\"text-align:left\"><strong>A few takes-homes</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3> While the preferential aspects of modesty are subjective, the principle is objective </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>One fundamental principle of\ndress across the bible is modesty. Then there are those of us who will seek to\nsubjectivise and relativise the issue of modesty until there is nothing left to\nwork with and thus inevitably undermining the wisdom of God in giving&nbsp; the principle. While superficial and\npreferential aspects of modesty can be debated, the core fundaments of the\nprinciple are sufficiently objective. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Modesty fundamentally means that whatever is chosen as dress or attire should not emphasise sexuality. If you are struggling with what this means and boils down to practically, I have no doubt in my mind that God will help you if you are sincere. Prescriptivism has been one major problem around the issue of dress and to venture into prescribing mechanically what to wear or what not to wear is to miss the point by a huge stretch. My view is that Jesus has no struggle whatsoever in dressing his children up  to His satisfaction. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The best way to assimilate the\nprinciple of modest is to ask a few questions when dealing with the issue of\ndress:</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:list {\"ordered\":true} -->\n<ol><li><strong>Does this attire deemphasise my sexuality? </strong></li><li><strong>Does the attire help me focus less on myself and more on God? </strong></li></ol>\n<!-- /wp:list -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>If you can answer “yes” earnestly\nto those both questions then go ahead and wear it. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>By the way this is the reason\nwhy most people are comfortable in adorning casual attire rather than rocking\nup in overly formal wear at church. In most cases, encumbering formal wear like\na suit or anything similar for females, tend to keep the wearer more\nself-conscious and self-absorbed than modest yet casual apparel that\nessentially divests attention from self.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3> Principles of Modesty are for our edification </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>This is very important. Having\nasserted the objective principle of modesty I have to state that the principles\nof modesty and all education on how we should conduct ourselves are for our\nedification and the edification of those we have influence over. These\nprinciples are not for sizing up or measuring the spirituality of others. In\nother words, the biblical principles of modesty are for our benefit and the\nbenefit of those we have access to influence positively. These principles are\nNOT for policing fellow mortals and curating their spirituality based on the\nshortness or lengths of their skirts or on whether their attires meet our rigid\nand formalistic human standards. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h2>The principles of modesty are a shield and not a weapon.</h2>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Consider this, “The foul spirit of forming negative and uninformed opinions about others is the outcome of the “judge” over estimating their importance and esteeming themselves better than the “judged” in a convoluted paradigm of comparative holiness.” (<strong><a href=\"https://expound.org.za/why-do-we-judge-others/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" aria-label=\"Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy, Expound: 2020 (opens in a new tab)\">Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy, Expound: 2020</a>)</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In conclusion, wearing a tie\nand a suit or whatever the equivalent are for females does not make anyone\nholy. Holiness is an outcome of: rather than a means to salvation. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Don’t hesitate to share your\nthoughts below. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Recommended Post: </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong><a href=\"https://expound.org.za/why-do-we-judge-others/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" aria-label=\"Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy (opens in a new tab)\">Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy</a></strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Does wearing a suit and necktie make you holy? Mental hygiene on church and dress','','inherit','closed','closed','','99838-revision-v1','','','2020-03-14 22:29:08','2020-03-14 20:29:08','',99838,'https://expound.org.za/99838-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),(99844,1,'2020-03-14 22:29:38','2020-03-14 20:29:38','<!-- wp:image {\"id\":99839} -->\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"https://expound.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/churh-and-dress-code-suit-and-neck-tie-bondage-1024x364.png\" alt=\"Suit and necktie bondage. Church and dress code\" class=\"wp-image-99839\"/></figure>\n<!-- /wp:image -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>I can barely imagine any issue\nthat is as half as decisive as the issue of dress and music in Christendom. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The point of departure for\nthis post is captured in the title, “Does wearing a suit and a necktie make you\nholy?”. “Suit and necktie” are chosen for immediate resonance and are by no\nmeans used to disenfranchise the females from the discourse. By extension, the\nquestion interrogates the issue of what holiness really is and whether or not\nlegalistic impositions on conduct for corporate worship do hold water. The\nquestion that also arises, inescapably is, what attire is acceptable for\nchurch? Should such a question even arise?</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Two framing contentions.</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:list {\"ordered\":true} -->\n<ol><li>Some Christians feel people need to come dressed at their “best” when they come to church for they come to meet their King and as such they have to be in their best (formal) attire and conduct.</li><li>Some feel the issue of attire is a non-issue as the defining principle of true worship is worshiping God in spirit and truth.</li></ol>\n<!-- /wp:list -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<strong> Let’s delve into a few insights and then conclude a few biblical guidelines</strong>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Let’s deal with the first\nframing contention that asserts that we should come to church at our best\nattire (and in most cases “best” is misused as synonym for “formal”) as we are\ncoming to meet our King, as a matter of fact, the King of the Universe. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>This notion seems to curry favor with a lot of average Christian thinking that has been regrettably entrenched as gospel truth. The argument that when we come to church we are coming to meet our King and thus we should be in the best (formal) of our attires only holds water until we appreciate that the very King is our Father. Do you really need to dress up to meet your Dad? God is many things to us but His defining principle for our relationship with Him is that He is our Father, for we are His sons and daughters.  At this point there is no need to deconstruct the “formalistic” spat further, its flawed framing is sufficiently and defectively untenable. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Secondly, God is omnipresent. This denotes that He is present everywhere without necessarily having to be physically present everywhere for He arts in heaven. The nub of this fact is that we live in the presence of God in our homes, in whatever business we do in our kitchens, bedrooms, bathrooms and elsewhere (everywhere) God is ever present. We do not go to church to meet God primarily, although we ultimately do as He is the center of what we go to church for. Nonetheless we go to church primarily to fellowship with fellow humans, of course in the presence of an ever present God. Thus; most of our notions of decorum and propriety are informed more by culture and human expectations which have nothing at all to do with God. Nothing is sad as seeing humanity anoint mere tradition on the throne of gospel truth and generations swallowing the formalistic palaver as if it were a thus saith the Lord. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In order to exercise mental\nhygiene on this issue, the formalistic tribe who are driven by a lopsided ratio\nof zeal to knowledge must interrogate the basis of their positions on this\nissue. In most cases the dogmatic overbearing disposition stems from mere\nsocialisation. There is no wisdom in reason that is circumscribed within the\nconfines of socialisation and taps not from the rich and diverse cultures and\nexperiences outside its place of birth and death. A fixation on mere tradition\nis what led to the Jews crucifying their own messiah. Perish the thought of\ndead formalistic traditionalism. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The biggest currency for true\nfellowship and Christianity is social literacy or social intelligence; which\nderives from Christian love and high levels of tolerance for the next human\nbeing. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3>Biblical guidelines on dress</h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>&nbsp;1 Peter 3:3-4 </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>3 Your beauty should not come\nfrom outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold\njewellery or fine clothes. 4 Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the\nunfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s\nsight.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph {\"align\":\"left\"} -->\n<p style=\"text-align:left\"><strong>A few takes-homes</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3> While the preferential aspects of modesty are subjective, the principle is objective </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>One fundamental principle of\ndress across the bible is modesty. Then there are those of us who will seek to\nsubjectivise and relativise the issue of modesty until there is nothing left to\nwork with and thus inevitably undermining the wisdom of God in giving&nbsp; the principle. While superficial and\npreferential aspects of modesty can be debated, the core fundaments of the\nprinciple are sufficiently objective. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Modesty fundamentally means that whatever is chosen as dress or attire should not emphasise sexuality. If you are struggling with what this means and boils down to practically, I have no doubt in my mind that God will help you if you are sincere. Prescriptivism has been one major problem around the issue of dress and to venture into prescribing mechanically what to wear or what not to wear is to miss the point by a huge stretch. My view is that Jesus has no struggle whatsoever in dressing his children up  to His satisfaction. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>The best way to assimilate the\nprinciple of modest is to ask a few questions when dealing with the issue of\ndress:</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:list {\"ordered\":true} -->\n<ol><li><strong>Does this attire deemphasise my sexuality? </strong></li><li><strong>Does the attire help me focus less on myself and more on God? </strong></li></ol>\n<!-- /wp:list -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>If you can answer “yes” (earnestly) to those two questions then go ahead and wear it. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>By the way this is the reason\nwhy most people are comfortable in adorning casual attire rather than rocking\nup in overly formal wear at church. In most cases, encumbering formal wear like\na suit or anything similar for females, tend to keep the wearer more\nself-conscious and self-absorbed than modest yet casual apparel that\nessentially divests attention from self.</p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h3> Principles of Modesty are for our edification </h3>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>This is very important. Having\nasserted the objective principle of modesty I have to state that the principles\nof modesty and all education on how we should conduct ourselves are for our\nedification and the edification of those we have influence over. These\nprinciples are not for sizing up or measuring the spirituality of others. In\nother words, the biblical principles of modesty are for our benefit and the\nbenefit of those we have access to influence positively. These principles are\nNOT for policing fellow mortals and curating their spirituality based on the\nshortness or lengths of their skirts or on whether their attires meet our rigid\nand formalistic human standards. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:separator -->\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"/>\n<!-- /wp:separator -->\n\n<!-- wp:html -->\n<h2>The principles of modesty are a shield and not a weapon.</h2>\n<!-- /wp:html -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Consider this, “The foul spirit of forming negative and uninformed opinions about others is the outcome of the “judge” over estimating their importance and esteeming themselves better than the “judged” in a convoluted paradigm of comparative holiness.” (<strong><a href=\"https://expound.org.za/why-do-we-judge-others/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" aria-label=\"Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy, Expound: 2020 (opens in a new tab)\">Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy, Expound: 2020</a>)</strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>In conclusion, wearing a tie\nand a suit or whatever the equivalent are for females does not make anyone\nholy. Holiness is an outcome of: rather than a means to salvation. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p>Don’t hesitate to share your\nthoughts below. </p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong>Recommended Post: </strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->\n\n<!-- wp:paragraph -->\n<p><strong><a href=\"https://expound.org.za/why-do-we-judge-others/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" aria-label=\"Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy (opens in a new tab)\">Judgementalism: The Scourge of Chronic Introspective Illiteracy</a></strong></p>\n<!-- /wp:paragraph -->','Does wearing a suit and necktie make you holy? Mental hygiene on church and dress','','inherit','closed','closed','','99838-revision-v1','','','2020-03-14 22:29:38','2020-03-14 20:29:38','',99838,'https://expound.org.za/99838-revision-v1/',0,'revision','',0),